It’s time for Kpopalypse to look back on his predictions for 2021, and make all new predictions for 2022!  Come with Kpopalypse for a look into the crystal ball of k-pop!

Before we delve into the destiny of 2022, let’s take a look at 2021 – at around this time last year I made a lot of bold predictions with my notorious super Boram ESP powers! How well did Kpopalypse do?

RESULTS OF 2021 PREDICTIONS

BTS remain large but also continue to implode – CORRECT.  In 2021 BTS are still as massive as ever but show all the signs of burnout, at least a few years back they had the energy to write some of their own music.

Aespa do just fine – CORRECT.  Despite lots of doom and gloom about “oh no [insert completely fake ‘concern’ here] what a huge mistake SM is making” Aespa suffered zero setbacks of any type.

Changing of the guard – CORRECT.  Gfriend and Lovelyz both called it quits a lot quicker than most people suspected they would, while new groups like Aespa, Itzy, Everglow and others started taking up a bigger space of k-pop fan consciousness.  As for the boy groups…

Boy groups come back strong – CORRECT.  Most of the men just kept right on moving, and the quality of comebacks was above average as certain annoying new trends in boy group music gradually started to move past their peak phase.

Blackpink continue to PAVE THE WAY – CORRECT, there was no real threat to Blackpink domination in 2021 as their star continued to rise.

More of those fun “cultural” k-pop controversies appear – CORRECT.  Gfriend’s Sowon lead the charge, earning herself a coveted Kpopalypse POSITIVE post for her excellent fashion sense, but she wasn’t the only one.

Fandoms experience backlash – CORRECT.  Toxic fandom behaviour was written about in some new places in 2021, cementing fandom idiocy into a well-known global meme.  Certain fandoms then savagely turned on the authors of these articles in a doxxing cyberbullying frenzy, thus proving that everything that was written about them was true.

Coronavirus continues to mess shit up – CORRECT.  With Delta and now Omicron, we’re not out of the woods yet and won’t be for quite some time.  Expect your favourite k-pops to keep getting infected, and for them to in turn continue to infect our ears with horrible Coronavirus-themed songs.

Yua Mikami comes back to k-pop – CORRECT… kind of.  The Honey Popcorn comeback we all crave didn’t happen with Yua promoting some godawful j-shit nobody cares about instead, but she did do a Twice dance video, proving that the fire still burns within her for the k-pops.

Apink surprise us all – CORRECT.  Who expected Apink’s Chorong of all people to be accused of being a cigarette smoking, soju drinking Northface-wearing ijlin?  Not anyone who stanned the group over the last decade that’s for sure.

IU gets into shit again – INCORRECT.  IU had a squeaky clean year controversy-wise, it was unfortunately only her songs that were shit in 2021.

K-pop agencies reform, somewhat – INCONCLUSIVE.  No news might be good news, or it might mean that agencies are just getting better at hiding the dirt.

Wait, did you say Han Seo Hee?  Again?  Really? – CORRECT, Han Seo Hee came back with a YouTube series that was so hot to handle that the second episode didn’t even last long enough for anyone to send me the video of it.  Oh and then she went to prison.  Finally.  Again.  I’m ready for that interview when you come out, Han Seo Hee.

Itzy git gud – CORRECT.  Well okay the songs were garbage but they certainly got more popular and that’s what matters, right?

More virtual idols – CORRECT, almost every agency foisted a terrifying CGI avatar or virtual creation onto their audience this year.

Some big changes in the k-pop online world – CORRECT, infamous pro-snake site Netizenbuzz finally collapsed.  Yes they’re still publishing articles with a revised facelift, but when a site that’s all about the importance of netizen comments decides to remove all of their netizen comments, functionally they’ve stopped existing.

Kpopalypse continues to be a cunt – CORRECT.  Does this one even need any explanation?  Certainly not for fans of [insert just about any k-pop group with a fandom here].

 

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So as usual Kpopalypse predictions were mostly correct thanks once again to SUPER BORAM ESP – James Randi lick my runny turds!  Now it’s time to see what Kpopalypse forsees for 2022!  Super Boram ESP powers are now activated!

KPOPALYPSE’S PREDICTIONS FOR 2022

Twice loses members – the fact that any nine-member group can last this long is nothing short of a miracle…

Loona do it tough – …and that’s nothing compared to what it takes to keep a twelve-member group together.

Girl groups come back strong – after a very disappointing 2021 with few female idol groups doing anything of worth, 2022 will be a different ball game.

Blackpink pull their finger out… finally – we might actually get a song in 2022.  This is the boldest prediction in this list.

BTS start backsliding – when you’re at the top there’s only one way to go and that’s down.  Fasten your seatbelts as we may be entering some turbulence.

A new legal fight emerges – someone is pissed off, and they’re coming out with all guns blazing, it’ll get messy even by k-pop standards.

NFTs for everyone – they might not be very environment, but that won’t stop certain agencies going full-tilt into the crypto-sphere.

K-pop events get back to normal… kind of – there’ll still be coronavirus, but with global isolation fatigue and businesses crumbling, the k-pop world will just decide that they care about killing people a little less than they did last year.

Idol health takes centre stage – some sad events will ensure that the spotlight gets shone again on the same industry practices that I’ve been repeatedly pointing out since 2013.  Hopefully something besides talk will happen this time, but probably not.

Drugs?  Yes please – with all this poor health going on, idols will do what they have to do to get through it.

Wacky endorsements ahoy – with the idol industry struggling to pay the bills harder than usual, expect some very strange endorsement activity in 2022.

A long-neglected group gets large – it doesn’t happen very often, but a group that have struggled to make it big so far finally gets their time.

Wonho delivers more than expected – the most fanservice-friendly man in k-pop takes his game to the next level, surprising even his own thirsty fappers.

More idol streamers/YouTubers – this type of activity will grow exponentially in 2022 as idols realise that they can make more money from ten minutes of video than an entire seven-year k-pop contract.

Some big k-pop exposes – more information comes to light about k-pop industry practices, including some that you didn’t even know existed until now.

Korean culture faces serious criticism – the “hallyu OMG so aegyo” tone of western publications starts to become tempered with caution.

Velvet dips her toe into k-pop – my “if I think it, maybe I can make it happen” pick for 2022.  Let’s be honest, she is born to be a k-pop.

Kpopalypse remains the biggest asshole k-pop writer in 2022 – reliability you can count on.

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That’s all the predictions for the next 12 months – expect them fondly! My final prediction is that Kpopalypse will return soon with more posts!