Now that there’s a winner in the 2020 USA election, we could all use a soundtrack, right? If you’re looking for just those right tunes to play to celebrate victory, this is the right place to be!
It’s honestly been exhausting following USA election coverage. Honestly I haven’t really wanted to and would have just preferred to shut my eyes and wait for it to all end, but since every cunt can’t stop tweeting about it for the past two years, I guess I’ve had no choice. It’s just as well for you Americans that your President finally cleared things up.
Thanks for that, chief! I of course knew this would happen in advance, so I made sure to sign up to TheDonald.win (the replacement Reddit that Trump supporters made when r/TheDonald got kicked off Reddit for Terms Of Service violations) and post there asking what Trump supporters would listen to on the road to when their guy eventually won. I had some good suggestions in return, but no k-pop! Really, these people have no taste, no wonder the country is so politically divided. Anyway Kpopalypse is now here to help them, and you, celebrate victory! Let’s do it!
SPEED – It’s Over/That’s My Fault
Riding high off the back of T-ara’s huge successes in 2012, their company MBK went all-out with Trump-like confidence in 2013, serving big budget videos for their boy group SPEED, and this duo of great tracks were the result. Key lyrics to get Trump supporters in the party mood:
It’s over It’s overI take it now it’s overIt’s over It’s overYou gonna be it’s over– SPEED: It’s Over
It hurts but it hurts too much – this is a foul
Because of my wrongs, I am being punished
I regret several times a day
When night comes,
tears don’t stop so I cry (I cry)
– SPEED: That’s My Fault
I think these lyrics would make a much better Trump tweet.
Girls’ Generation – The Boys
Trump famously told the right wing extremist group Proud Boys to “stand back and stand by”, maybe given the disputes in the counting process he will be tempted now to “b-bring the boys out”.
I know life is a mystery
I’m gonna make history
I’m taking it from the startCall all emergencyI’m watching the phone ringI’m feeling this in my heart
B-Bring the boys out– Girls’ Generation: The Boys
We all hope that it doesn’t come to this and Trump does not feel the need to “call all emergency”.
F-ve Dolls – You Cheated
You deceived me, you played with me
You stole my innocent heart
You changed, you are different
I pray that you meet someone like you
– F-ve Dolls: You Cheated
Perhaps the issue with why Trump’s accusations of Democrat cheating in the 2020 election aren’t being taken seriously outside his own supporters’ echo chamber isn’t to do with the content, but the delivery. Consider this:
A slight rewording, using the touch of romance provided by F-ve Dolls’ lyrics, and Trump sounds a whole lot more eloquent. Who could refuse a recount based on the below?
Apink – Dumhdurum
I’ve been masquerading
Do I look better? But my heart is dying
Don’t worry, baby, I’m so fine,
Everything’s all right, I’m doing just fine
My heart is like dumhdurum
– Apink: Dumhdurum
Clearly a song that lyrically captures the emotions of Trump victory, it’s topped off by the fact that the song title is inexplicable. If “dumhdurum” is meant to represent the sound of a beating heart, why do the lyrics say “my heart is dying”? It’s a word as unsatisfactorily explained as “covfefe” and makes equal sense in context.
IU ft. Suga – Eight
So are you happy now?
Finally happy now, are you?
Well, I’m exactly the same
I think I’ve lost everything
– IU ft. Suga: Eight
Do you know how hard it is for someone to lose an election mid-term in the USA political system? It’s very rare due to the way the system operates to favour the person already in power, and you have to completely fuck up your presidency for it to happen. So this song, with more celebratory lyrics, is here to celebrate Trump’s “eight” years of presidency!
If nothing else I feel like he’ll definitely be delivering on this key item in his 2021 agenda.
I know this playlist is very short, but let’s not celebrate too hard, there’s work to do fixing the free world! Kpopalypse will return soon with more freedom and more posts for you!