It’s time for QRIMOLE!  Let’s take a look at more questions for Kpopalypse!

Kpopalypse, please tell me if I’m crazy, or if you too can see that this is some of the most excessive photoshop in a while for a high profile group:

Not even oiled up newborns have skin texture like that, and this man is 25.
I said that it looks like they completely blurred his skin and added texture after, and got downvoted into the depths of hell. That this is what a professional photoshoot looks like. Asked someone I know in real life, they agreed with the downvoters.
I wish I could avoid this, but it’s BTS so gushing about 6 more images like that will dominate every common kpop space in the near future.
I’ve seen a lot of kpop pics and the vast majority aren’t as jarring as this one.

At first glance to me, it looks airbrushed.  Airbrushing is what they used to do to professional photos before Photoshop.  Of course with Photoshop you can airbrush electronically now, and basically paint on textures, smooth everything out.  Every professional photoshoot is manipulated and touched up, and normally the manipulation is a bit more subtle, but they really went crazy with this one.  Where the neck meets the t-shirt looks especially weird, but so is the rest of it, especially around the eyes.  I’m surprised they didn’t accidentally give him an extra finger or something, I’ve seen that one before.

theres something about this song that I rlly like but my stupid adhd brain cant put a finger on it

It’s a j-shit so not even going to link it.  I don’t know why anyone would like this.  Next!

Hello! I have a problem. I really love music, I love listening to it, I love playing guitar, and I really want to write music. The problem is I don’t know where to start. I’ve written a few crappy songs with just lyrcis and some interesting chord progressions, but I’m just so bad at writing a melody for my lyrics. I really don’t understand how to do it, I think the problem is I don’t understand enough about guitar / music to just improvise a melody over chords. Do you have any suggestions on how I should go about this? Should I experiment or use some sort of online resource? I have so many ideas on what a song would sound like – but I have no idea on how to write it out and actually garner the skills to make it sound like what I want it to sound like especially with different instruments.

I don’t really know any good online resources for this, I know there are a lot, but specifically geared towards pop music – not so much.  That’s why I’m writing my own!  Hopefully my music theory series can help you a bit here.  Episodes 9 and 10 in particular cover areas relevant to your question that you might find useful, I’d suggest read over that and then ask again if you have more specific questions.

Are you into Eurovision?

No.  It’s really popular in Australia (for some weird reason we’re even allowed to enter acts into it, like wtf I guess they don’t take the “Euro” part too seriously) but I don’t watch it or follow what happens.  I inevitably hear about it anyway because my friends all post about it on social media.

hows the pandemic in Australia? 😀 I heard the area damaged by the fires is starting to grow back too! also for a cat dad you hardly post pics of your cat and I find that very offensive, plis fix that

In my part of the country things are pretty much completely back to normal, with the exception of no real travel, hospitality industry or large live shows.  Victoria, the big “problem state”, is starting to do better too.  Only about 450 people have died so far of the COVID here, we’ve been handling it pretty well.  Our current leader here is definitely an idiot, but fortunately the states have taken matters into their own hands and controlled things in cases where he wouldn’t because he’s so lazy and incompetent and would rather just watch football and pray with his church buddies.

Australian bushland is actually designed to catch on fire, the native eucalyptus trees have a lot of natural flammable oils.  That’s how the bush regenerates.  (Yes even the trees will try to kill you here.)  Australian Aboriginals have known this for a long time, and would do (and continue to do) controlled burnings to clear away tree litter long before our fire departments figured out it was a good idea.

There’s weekly cat content on my livestream plus other cat content from time to time.

do you/did you ever listen to cypress hill or papa roach? if so do you think kpop would ever release something like that. maybe a rock heavy rap song like rock superstar?

I always though Papa Roach were crap but I quite like Cypress Hill, although not all the time.  They sound better when they’re not putting guitars into their songs.  Very very few people mix rap music and metal convincingly.  I thought Iron’s “Rock Bottom” was a (very rare) good attempt at mixing these styles in the k-pop realm and it might be somewhat what you’re looking for.

hey oppa! it’s the girl who had trouble with that friend of mine a few qrimoles back. we arnt dating and honestly idek if we’re friends right now but that’s not what I wanna ask. I have a friend who was super mad that I chose my ex over her, even tho she chose her gf over me And she was friends with my ex for a bit. however she had no problem being friends with my ex’s best friend. is this hypocritical or am I looking into it too much?

I had to read this question about five times to work out what you were asking.  That alone is probably an indication that you’re overthinking things a little.  Maybe it is hypocritical but there’s probably reasons for it, everyone has circumstances that will waive certain standards that they uphold.  It’s good to recognise how people think and what you’re dealing with, but I wouldn’t let it bother you too much, we’re probably all a little fallible in this way.

oppa do you consider stray kids as artists? seeing as they’re mostly self producing

I don’t really think about it.  Even self-producing artists still have a lot of outside direction.  I mean, if Stray Kids decided to release something like “Metal Machine Music” I’m sure that JYP would veto it.  So there’s a line of control somewhere.  Rather than thinking of k-pop artists (including songwriters) as “artists”, I think of them more as “crafters”, who hone their skills in creating a product for us to enjoy.  Objectively it still is “art” of a sort, but I’m not overly invested in k-pop as an “artistic ideal”, it’s too grounded in commercial realities for that.

what’s ur ideal mv for twice

The best ones are “Knock Knock” and “Likey”.

Knock Knock is just bright and fun, everyone looks great, and the theme of the song and video are very obvious and very much in sync.

Likey is a different beast, one of the smartest videos that exists in k-pop, and as highly misunderstood as the song itself.  Events appear random but they are really not.  The following video does a good job of explaining what’s really going on.

have u reviewed got7’s if you do and n.flying’s rooftop? if not then what do u think about them

Probably, just look back through my roundups.  The serach bar on my website is pretty powerful, throw in a band name and song name and if you’re lucky it’ll take you straight to the roundup where those songs featured.

post cat pic bitch

no u

I wanna get into metal after hating it for years becuz of a shitty ex. I follow ur blog for a while now and I tried listening to some slayer but it was,,,,a bit too much for me. what bands/songs do u recc me to listen to that wud ease the process? I do listen to alot of rock and post punk music like deff leppard, linkin park, red jumpsuit apprentice and 3 days grace if that helps!

Yeah I wouldn’t have started with Slayer, as much as I like them that’s kind of going straight to the deep end of the pool.  I’d recommend Iron Maiden to a metal beginner because they’re quite melodic with a big focus on vocals which should appeal to someone who is more used to pop music, yet they’re also still heavy.

HOW TO STOP LISTENING T-ARA ROLY POLY? PLEASE HELP!!!

Sorry it’s been ten years since the song came out and I still haven’t figured it out.  Welcome to my prison cell don’t hog the TV thanks.

Do you think all the attention Irene gets for her looks, with all the positive and negative connotations it can bring to her, its the main reason for her to think she can get away with rude behavior or is this overly simplistic? I think that having such generally desired for looks can warp your interactions/relationships in messy ways.
Bonus question: Opinion of Ada Wong from the Resident Evil franchise or, if you haven’t played them, what do you think of Femme Fatales in media?

Well it’s a two way street with that “rude behaviour” shit.  Remember that idols HAVE to be nice to support staff all the time even when those support staff are fucking up.  I’d say it’s got nothing to do with how she looks but more to do with the twisted dynamics of backstage relationships.  Further reading here.

I haven’t played enough Resident Evil to know who Ada Wong is.  I don’t really have any opinion on “Femme Fatale” because my idea of what that even means is pretty hazy.

Hello lad, hope you are doing good.

I’m sure you have seen tons of bullshit over the years coming from korea and the kpop fans but this has to be the creepiest and also the most denigrating thing you can do to a kpop idol IMO.

Looks like the ladies are not just going to fulfill any kind of crazy kpop fan loneliness and fantasies, who knows? But also make them even more replaceable than the countless nct’s. Do you think this will be the future or lee soo man has just lost it?

Let’s wait and see how it pans out.  I’m sure it will be perfectly safe and won’t harm anyone.

do you reckon idols give a shit if somebody rub one out of him/her?

I think it would be more or less expected by everybody except for the exceptionally naive.  Some would be more naive than others.

Sowon – pretty naive.  Yerin – not so much.

Hi! I have been following you for a short while, and I am writing this question to tackle a very serious issue I encountered while surfing through your blog.
I am a great EXO fan and, while I appreciate all the kpop stuff and everything, the lack of drama content really left me empty-handed. Therefore, when I saw the drama reviews of Honey Popcorn, I couldn’t be any happier! And there was even a drama with Xiumin! I was completely hooked and, without thinking twice, I immediately checked if I could find it on any streaming website. And there was one! However, my face went from enthused to straight-up revolted when I noticed that something was wrong. There was no Xiumin to greet me, but rather a naked man fondling Yua Mikami’s breasts and perfoming intercourse!
This is absolutely disgusting, and you really should not bribe your readers like that, especially with such explicit content. You were my idol when I saw you reviewing a drama with Xiumin, but now you’re just a puke-inducing crusty old man. Shame on you!

Cheers,
An angry EXO-L

I don’t know what you’re talking about.  You must have just missed the scene with him in it.  Maybe watch it again a few times.

p.s you may enjoy more drama reviews here and here, and don’t forget to check out this wholesome Xiumin fanfic!

Not a question, but I thought you might find use of this image of Dreamcatcher’s Gahyeon pointing a toy gun at her head:

Okay, how about this:

My question:“Kpopalypse is a K-pop Blog for people who wash paper plates and immediately put it in a dish washer after washing it and then go all like “YAAAAS I’M QUEEEEEN!”
I don’t really mean to insult but this is my observation reading the blog.”
Mr. Kpopalypse, what do you have to say for yourself?

It’s hard to even feel all that insulted by something when I really have no idea what it’s trying to say.

Hi oppar,

Many people seem to be like Kpop gg direction so far because we now have Everglow’s La Di Da and Twice’s I Can’t Stop Me. While their existence don’t necessarily mean other ggs will jump the bandwagon, 80’s influenced Kpop may be one of the concepts we can expect to see in the not so distant future. However, somehow I can’t get into both songs in the first listens. Like this song is catchy but why I don’t love it immediately?

I do not have any musical background, so I don’t know how to phrase this correctly. But I have this hypothesis when I notice that both of them are using notes that played throughout the songs (?) and I can’t notice any difference in the arrangement during the chorus. It’s probably me, but I am used to listen to a song with more “crowded” chorus so that I am aware that this is the chorus. So, the lack of difference between the verses and chorus is what probably bothers me.

Anyway, is part of the 80’s songs style have that kind of arrangement so I have to accept this, or it’s probably me that habituated to certain song arrangement? It will be nice if you could explain this to me in order to make myself prepared for the future 80’s Kpop lol. I hope you understand my question lol since I’m not a native English speaker. Have a nice day! Thank you!

It’s a little difficult to work out what you’re saying, not because of any English language barrier, but because of a musical language barrier.  As my dad used to say to me when he was yelling at me to practice the piano more, “music is a language”.  I guess you’re just saying that the verse and choruses of the Everglow and Twice songs are similar?  I wouldn’t say that they’re very similar, not more so than most songs, but I think with very modern k-pop music there’s a real trend where the chorus sounds almost like it’s stapled on from a completely different song.  That’s a trend that will probably die soon and most songs actually are not that way, but I guess for someone new to pop music in general it might not feel like it.  Sorry if this wasn’t exactly what you were asking.

Hi kpopalypse, have you heard of the philosophy of antinatalism? If so, what are your thoughts? I

I had to look this up.  I think any philosophy is fine for yourself, but when you try to enforce it on others then you’re no better than any annoying religious zealot.  Still, I’m not interested in having children and I find Doug Stanhope’s anti-baby routines very righteous.

I hope you’re happy and well!
I just wanted to vent some stuff out of my chest in this *public* space.
So, I don’t feel like living, and, also, I don’t feel like I could kill myself. I’m just sorta numb.
I’m finishing college and starting my professional life, but I feel too pressed to do well and be successful that I’ve been torturing myself psychologically.
I don’t feel like I’ll be anything in life, and I feel bad that I keep trying even though I’m set to failure.
I don’t like most people and I couldn’t care less about my appearance and/or being happy.
I’ve always been like this, but I feel like it’s gotten worse recently. Nothing really motivates me, and I’m just going through the days, crying silently.
Anyways, just wanted to know how to not suffer so much and be a better person, because I’ve been feeling like sh*t in my own skin since forever.

Most of your issues, that you feel numb to everything, unmotivated, don’t think you’ll achieve anything etc – they all rub up against your one other big problem, which is that you feel pressure to do well and be successful.  If you’re feeling that burned out by life, why does success and doing well actually mean anything to you and have such a grip on you that you feel pressed?  I think the problem you’re experiencing isn’t one of being sick of life, but one of realising that this autopilot value system you hold that desires hard work and success isn’t actually one that’s compatible with the way you want to live your life.  It’s like you’re stuck in a B-tier k-pop group trying to achieve perfection and success at impossible odds while it’s destroying your soul, maybe instead of throwing in the towel on life you should consider joining an independent group where there’s no pressure and the value system is completely different.  You need to change something.  I can’t tell you what it is exactly, but I can tell you that releasing the pressure (whther you’re putting it on yourself, or others are) will do you a world of good and give you a clear space to think about your options.

Not a question, just wanted to let you know that I’ve really come to appreciate the constancy and consistency of the content on your blog over the years. I was sad to learn that the Kpopalypse radio show came to an end this year, due to time zones I usually listened to either the Kpopalypse bootleg recording or on the app as a quick and convenient way to catch up on new releases. At least the round-ups are still continuing and I know that your determination levels have not waned with the passage of time. Thank you for continuing to feature not only idols but also non-idols, ex-idols, indie musicians, and all kinds of interesting or “interesting” people who make up part of this industry and interact with it in one capacity or another. Scandalous or trendy bullshit come and go, groups debut and disappear, but I’m thankful that I can always go to kpopalypse.com and know what I can expect to see here. Thanks, a caonima

Thank you – I do my best!  I’m sorry the radio show had to end as well but it was very necessary, however the livestream does replace it to an extent because I do a mini live roundup on that each week.  The roundup posts will of course continue!

Hey Oppar! I’m not really sure if it’s just me, but why are LOOΠ∆’s post-debut songs (except Hi High obviously) so… not LOOΠ∆? I thought it would be the change in image, but… that’s more on a visual level, so I wondered what seemed to be off about their new songs post Butterfly… I mean atleast Butterfly still had that LOOΠ∆-esque auditory aesthetic but I couldn’t just quite get it… like I know 1/3 leans heavily on early Lovelyz sound and “classical” music orchestration, OEC has their space-motif, while yyxy has… beats(?) ╮(. ❛ ᴗ ❛.)╭ in Hi High, all these elements are there (and VERY underappreciated) while in Butterfly there’s atleast the “vibe”. Then here comes So What and Why Not both being totally outta left field! And I’m not sure what’s so off about these two besides the change of songwriters… I mean TWICE had different songwriters but it still seemed TWICE so what gives?
tl;dr: What makes LOOΠ∆ sound LOOΠ∆ and why the 2020 comeback songs don’t seem to be like their own?

Different songwriters wrote the new stuff, and that’s certainly part of it, but it’s never the whole story.  The other part is, what instructions are those songwriters working with.  Twice’s songwriters are probably given instructions on a template or feel to work with, whereas I think Loona just handed the keys to the kingdom over to SM’s songwriters and said “modernise us”.  I mean, who in k-pop is going to boss around Lee Soo Man.

Do you think Lee Soo Man is trying to take loona’s sound/test out itzy lite for his new GG as some people have suggested?
They are a competing GG if he was trying to make an ‘international appeal’ themed group like NCT failed to be, and he does have history investing in groups just to take them off the market.

I don’t know if it’s that underhanded.  Maybe he just stans Loona like the rest of us.

Yo. I said once that I disagreed with about 99% of what you write, but I’ve recently done some deep-diving on your blog (been spending more time on the toilet lately) and I have to update that percentage. I think it’s closer to 75% really, maybe even 60%. I still think you’re a degenerate, but I’m a Catholic so I think everyone is degenerate (probably because I’m projecting), but you’re a funny fucking guy and you’ve got a brain capable of critical thought, which puts you above 99% of the world (including me).

So there’s that. Anyway, on to my idiotic question.

Is there a musical (theory-related) reason why I like Loona’s pre-debut shit way more than their post debut shit? Or is this all just personal taste?

I mean, some of their pre-debut stuff isn’t flat out amazing, but I liked pretty much every song and I thought a good 50% of it was really fucking good. But then they debuted and Favorite (not gonna bother trying to remember which letters to capitalize here, that shit is for geeks) and High Hi (or is it Hi High? some geek can correct me here) were good, but not great. Then all these Butterfly teasers had me thinking that song was gonna be dope, but it turned out that was all intro shit and the song itself was just okay. Not bad, but kind of mediocre.

I didn’t like So What as a whole at first, but the parts that I did like grew on me a bit and overall I’d say it’s not a bad song, but it’s closer to bad than anything else they had done up to that point. And now Why Not kind of makes me want to answer: because your music is progressively getting worse. The rap shit is pretty hilarious at this point. I mean, Heejin is a 90 lbs girl who has a fucking phobia of pigeons, how can I take her seriously as some badass rap girl? There were parts of Why Not that were promising, but it felt like a first-draft. Empty.

Anyway this is getting too long. It’s probably just personal preference anyway, there might not be any reason for it at all. Maybe theory-wise this is all just the same three ingredients prepackaged in a different way and I’m just bitching about McDonalds vs BurgerKing but I really feel like the music of Loona went from pretty unique to pretty bland pretty fast.

Peace out.

Here I was thinking that you were going to come up with something really different because of that awesome catholic intro, and then you just asked kind of the same question everyone else did.  It’s personal taste obviously, but music choices drive taste, so it’s a music theory reason too.  You probably just like more focus on melody in songs and less shouty nonsense.  That’s understandable, especially if you’ve had a Catholic upbringing, my mother told me that her Catholic upbringing was filled with shouty nonsense and that’s partly why she renounced Catholicism as an adult.

Is there a specific musical term for the “cymbal on beat 2” thing that is used in songs such as Momoland’s “Wonderful Love” or MINX’s “Love Shake”? Also wondering if there is a reason as to why it’s used in choruses or is it just coincidence? I personally feel like it creates a better divide between the chorus and pre-chorus (or bridge). Is this actually more common in other K-pop songs but just placed more subtly? If not they should put more cause I find it pretty neat when done right.

No, it’s just literally called a cymbal on beat two.  It’s there to really emphasise the crash by delaying it that extra beat to build the anticipation, in pop music it’s meant to sound very hyper and a little cheesy.  Obviously this fits into a musical section more when a songwriter wants to make a big bright impression, such as in a chorus.  If you want to hear it in a non-pop context, Metallica’s drummer is also notorious for it, crash cymbals on beat two are in almost every Metallica song in existence.

1. Over the decades, have there ever been any music artists whom you believe got a lot better AFTER they “sold out”?

2. If someone pointed a gun at your head and forced you to listen to a 90s Britpop artist for 2 hours, who would you choose? Or would you rather take the bullet?

3. Not a question, but I must say that I’m very surprised that you’ve never drawn any parallels between CLC’s “No” and Depeche Mode’s “Blasphemous Rumours“. To my ears at least, the music that plays during both songs’ verses sound very similar, and it almost sounds like CLC are about to sing, “I don’t want to start any blasphemous rumours, but I think that CUBE’s got a sick sense of humour, and when CLC dies, I expect to find them laughing” during the chorus. (For the record, I really love both of these songs, and I’m not trying to accuse CLC of plagiarism)

1. An impossible question to answer as what’s defined as “selling out” is so subjective and varies depending on who’s talking and what their preferences are.  It usually has absolutely zero to do with the actual money-making intentions of the artist, and a lot more to do with what certain individuals believe is “good content”.
2. I’d probably pick Pulp, they were the only one of those groups who had any good songs whatsoever (and even then they were hit and miss).  Certainly the only one with any sense of fun.  Oh and The Verve’s “Bitter Sweet Symphony” is actually really great, pity it’s the only good thing they ever did.
3. The songs don’t sound very similar to me at all.  The vocal meter is kind of similar but the melody is way off, and the rhythms and production style are certainly very different too.

In my caonima survey submission when asked how i was going, i wrote about how i had to break up with my boyfriend of 2 years via discord, because we live on opposite sides of the city and it’s 2020, after I realised, holy shit i think i’m a lesbian ? … long story i avoided intimacy beyond kissing with him and i dont think that’s something a girl who likes boys and has a boyfriend does (heavily paraphrased because i cant remember shit because i drank too much goon in high school). was kind of disappointed i wasn’t included in the post. i mean i wasnt expecting you to give any decent advice, but much like you, i like attention. anyway here’s an update on the situation: my ex boyfriend is talking to a guy now and they both like each other so im glad i didnt ruin him for life since what hurt most about leaving him is i didnt want to break his heart.

Glad things are working out!  Hopefully my question about sexuality in that survey helped you figure out your own sexuality.  Sorry I didn’t include you but I really do get bombarded with stuff so I can’t feature everything I receive.

Yo. It’s the 99% percent guy again. I did have another question. What’s the deal with Australian people and “Bruce”?

Sorry I have no idea what you mean by this.  Also, the world’s most famous Bruce is an American, so I ask you, what’s the deal with American people and “Bruce”?

Hi Kpopalypse,

Rather than waiting for a disgruntled employee, I sincerely wish that four to five decades later, when Mina and I are both retirees and senior citizens*, Mina would write a memoir detailing her life as a K-pop idol, and maybe she would dedicate a chapter or two to talk about all those lesbian fanservices she performed – I mean, I really want to know what was in her mind when Sana grabbed her butt  (Apparently I’m the only person who realize she committed sexual assault in front of a camera. 😅) Let’s just hope JYP Entertainment won’t sue her for libel/breaching her NDA by then.

My point is that fellow who asked you a physics question might be thinking you actually had a Bachelor of Engineering in Acoustical Engineering from an accredited university (which implies you had studied years and years of physics, chemistry and mathematics) and is a Professional Engineer…… Seriously dude, you really should reword that sentence in your FAQ.

I also agree to that female reader who wants to be a mathematician: the math taught in elementary and high school is the lowest form of it – Mathematics is not about computing stuff (computer algebra systems can do this faster than humans), but to think logically and creatively. That’s why I almost laughed myself to death whenever someone is saying Hyewon from IZ*ONE is good with Mathematics, because I have 75-80% confidence that if I ever show her my old assignments and exams from my first Discrete Mathematics class**, she might end up thinking all the Mathematics she learned before is a huge lie, like I once did. 🤣

And I have yet another hypothetical question for you: Assuming SM/YG/JYP/BigHit Entertainment is going to sue you for libel in South Korea*** (ever heard of Strategic lawsuit against public participation (SLAPP) and Libel tourism?), but they’re willing to settle the case outside the court for 500 thousands Australian Dollars, if you’re willing to shut down your blog and publish an apology. Will you take the offer?

* I’m just a year younger than her, so if she publishes the book, I think I can still read it. Not sure about you though…… 😛
** As a matter of fact, approximately one-third of my class failed the course, and I barely got a C+.
*** In South Korea, even true statements can be considered libel

I’m not rewording shit.  “Audio engineering” is a title of a degree that I have, it’s not my fault that people might confuse it with “engineering” or “acoustic engineering”.

I know there are twelve girls in Loona and that’s about as far as my maths goes.

I’d take the money, close down the blog, apologise, pay off my mortgage, then open up an identical blog anonymously.

I think you’ll appreciate this:

They’re doing it wrong but they still look okay at it so I’ll let it slide.  I really notice how many diagonal movements are in that dance compared to the more horizontal and vertical movements of Roly Poly when I see one with the music of the other.

just submitting Wona for nugu alert or wherever she might fit

I’ll just stick it here because I don’t know where else it might fit and I’ll probably forget to cover it later anyway.  I don’t mind it, it’s kind of trippy.

A thought has been bugging me these past days. I think that the ultimate aim of Korean idol training system is not to train idols to perfection but rather train them to be submissive, completely submissive. A submissive trainee is much more valuable to the company than a talented one. The company can maniuplate them into signing slave contracts more easily. They can get away by paying them minimum wage and many times much lower than the minimum wage. They can force them to undergo plastic surgery, can get them to perform sexual services for clients, work them to exhaustion. No arguments, no fuss, just keep milking them and throw them after their contract ends. What are your thoughts on it?

Agreed.  So much of the idol system is designed to do exactly this.

is there any k-pop song (or not) recommendation that sounds similar to Abba – Dancing Queen?

Not specifically no, the closest you’ll get to that is other ABBA songs, and the closest k-pop you’ll get to that is k-pop songs with vague ABBA influences (which I’ve mentioned before).

Hi Kpopalypse, I hope you won’t mind this question. I always just tolerated pets and haven’t had the chance to form a deep connection with a pet. I thought I’m a heartless bitch. But now that my partner’s dog is dying I actually cried. I didn’t expect this reaction from myself. But I feel like I cry more because I feel the loss for my partner. I guess the question is how do you support a grieving friend? How do you console them and be sensitive to their needs. Thank you if you’d ever answer this.

Just let them know you’re available if they want to talk about it, I think that’s the best thing.  Other than that I wouldn’t do anything overly specific.  Everyone grieves in different ways and has different needs when they do so, so it’s best to leave the ball in their court.

So I understand why you’re not in Jpop because of how annoying accessing the music is (even if it’s good). What about pop music from China? I’m not into Chinese music btw. I just found out the other day that Everglow was by Yuehua Entertainment, a Chinese company. Which made me realise China is more into expanding horizons unlike Japan and might also be competitive like Korea. Anyway if you are into it, would
also appreciate some recommendations. I loved Everglow’s La Di Da.

I don’t follow Chinese pop enough to really know.  I guess with China well and truly taking over from the USA as the main global superpower at this point, we’ll probably be hearing a lot more Chinese pop in our future and then you guys will probably all be recommending stuff to me.

Can Bom be reviewed again in your new boobs post? I think this is enough content to justify it.

No, because it’s too slippery a slope.  Let just one request like this through the gates and then EVERYONE “oh review person x again, they just did a thing and their boobs look different” no no no no no fucking way.  Did it once with Qri, never again unless you’ve got that $500,000 from Lee Soo Man handy.

Thanks for the video though.  Bom still the prettiest in 2NE1 and this video is more fanservice than her entire career up until this point.

Hi there oppar!

I don’t really have much to say or a question per se, but I came across this article and had to think about the frenchface thing you once wrote. If you wonder why some people think it’s inappropriate, a recap: the stereotypes are only based on Parisians and that it’s basically a form of whitewashing.
From my experience, people can get offended by frenchface but mostly because they are confronted by the stereotypes they hold (yikes). Very few adress the racism and disrimination suffered by wrongly portrayed groups (or the groups that are purposely left out). Paris, and France to some extent, is much more diverse than most anglophone media show. To see SK groups use these stereotypes shows – imo – the lack of research and interest in the culture they “draw inspiration from”. This is something from which the SK entertainment in general seems to suffer, regardless of the culture appropriated. Comedy shows, reality tv and so on, all incorporate elements of cultural appropriation.
Personally, I think that’s a universal thing. Every culture appropriates. I, as Western audience, should not be calling them out on something that happens here in the media landscape as well. I believe it’s way more important to call out the cultural appropriation that happens where I live. The reason being -imo- too obvious to explain. I really dislike the hypocritical stance some fans take on these issues. Before accusing someone of something, you should first look at yourself.
Or as a well-known proverb says: “One should dare to look in their bossom’s first”

Excuse me for the (extremely) literal translation, but I find it a good way to call someone a hypocrite. Also, sorry for the rant. I tried to structurize my text but I was annoyed by the KPop fandom and wanted to vent somewhere.

I think that anybody from culture A, looking to do something in the style of culture B, is always going to get things wrong, every single time, without exception.  Expecting anything less is silly, cultures are too multi-faceted and deep for an outsider to really be able to understand the inner workings of it all in a day, or even a decade, much less then reflect it accurately in a TV show with slim time constraints where there’s also sponsors who have to be pleased, an audience who has expectations and dozens of other competing interests.  The reason why people get this sort of stuff consistently very wrong time and time again is because the motivation for getting it right vs the motivation for creating some kind of entertaining artifact that placates all of the other interests and investments is near zero.  Rest assured that it will always be this way and nothing will ever change.  The sooner that people stop expecting an apple to be a motorcycle, the happier everyone will be.

Hi Kpopalypse hyung, I’m a Korean guy in my forties.

“I think k-pop has exploded worldwide mainly due to production smarts improving plus the Korean government creating an environment where Korean pop could be exported effectively, something that other countries haven’t really bothered with.”

Could you please expand on this? I’m wondering how any government can possibly help promote its pop music overseas, and if that’s possible, why are other countries not even interested in trying as you claim?

“Korean food and fashion is increasing in popularity anyway.”

Do you think this also has to do with the Korean government?

These are genuine questions out of curiosity. I’ve been trying to see if there is anything that underlies the recent popularity of Korean culture; is it just a fad or not?

Ever since late 2017 when I went on to see what’s all the fuss about BTS, I’ve been quickly converted to a K-pop girl groups stan from a metalhead. (I do thank you very much for this conversion.) After certain amount of research I concluded myself that BTS has (luckily or inevitably) invented a concept of looking genuine and organic, just enough to be seen non-robotic in western fans eyes. But where is the Korean government coming in here in their story?

How about Blackpink’s success? The Korean court seems to have helped YG a lot by not punishing him and his company duly enough, but the government and the court are distinct entities. What about JYP girl groups in Japan? As you may know the Korea-Japan relation has deteriorated quite severely since 2017.

If anything, it looks to me that the government has been utilizing the K-culture’s success to its promotional advantage during official ceremonies and foreign visits. The current government recently invited BTS to an official ceremony. Such invitations had happened a lot more frequently with the authoritarian governments in 2008-2017 which, on the other hand, blacklisted many artists and actors, as you may have heard about.

A related question: was there a significant government’s role in the popularity of 80-90’s Hong Kong cinema and Japanese animation? It sounds odd to me whenever I hear someone saying that the Japanese music industry does not try to expand overseas due to its huge domestic market. Then what about the ever dominant British/American culture and their markets?

Being a Korean myself I might not be able to see what the Korean government has been doing overseas. Seeking an outside viewpoint is one of the reasons why I frequent your blog. (Of course, the main reason being your excellent reviews that match my musical taste.) Hyung, please advise.

One of the big things that Korean pop did to help export themselves effectively, was embrace YouTube and the Internet.  On the other hand Japan’s pop industry has shied away from this to a large degree because they don’t want to give music away for free, but Korea has worked out that the music itself isn’t really the end product, but the key to larger goals.  Try finding Japanese pop music or Chinese pop music on YouTube even these days – it can be done but it’s really difficult, and there isn’t a large plethora of channels serving diverse and frequent pop content very very consistently, week after week.  A “Jpopalypse roundup” as a weekly feature, or even a monthly one, would be nearly impossible.

I link this video a lot, it’s old but still relevant and it goes in depth a lot about things like this.

Of course other aspects of Korean culture tie into this, the Korean government is trying to sell an idealised “Korea” to people overseas as a “lifestyle package”.  If you want to know more about the Korean government’s role in this, try this article.

YG got off lightly for the Burning Sun scandal because there are too many people in positions of power involved.  Not naming names, but I’m talking about people VERY high up in the social strata in Korea, literally as high as it goes.  If they went down, YG would go down, as well as a lot of other much larger things that are connected to YG, including a lot of things that the Korean government has financial interests in.  It could actually get to a situation where the Korean government’s stocks and investments could become so damaged that they couldn’t afford to pay people’s pensions.  That’s why only a few people got done for the YG stuff and it never really went anywhere big, people did the numbers and worked out that the collateral damage would have been too high.

I don’t know enough about Hong Kong cinema or Japanese animation to be able to answer your other question.

I came across this article on kpop trying to create local markets in Southeast Asia and thought I would pass it along.

This might also be relevant to the previous question-asker.

Does the sound effect in the (instrumental) intro of NCT U’s Misfit have a name? I liked it, but can’t pinpoint what it is. I’ve heard it before tho.

Which one?  I assume you mean the noise that is before the “la la la” vocal stuff, which is actually also the same vocal stuff with a lowpass filter slapped onto it that gradually opens up and sounds more and more like the vocal that it is as it progresses.  Unless you’re talking about the guitar in the background, which is… guitar.

Hi oppar, I want your perspective as a straight man on this topic. Something I’ve been noticing recently is that a very vocal contingent of straight guys seem really perturbed by the fact that some women are attracted to more feminine men. Examples: whenever BTS content gets crossposted to normie twitter I invariably see some guys bitching about how girly they look and bemoaning the fact that women like them; Hyunjin from Stray Kids got posted to Pewdiepie’s subreddit once (granted that subreddit is probably all dumbass teenagers) and the comments were all people spazzing out over how girly he is and how it makes no sense for women to like him; a decade ago a lot of men would get psychotically angry about Justin Bieber’s looks. Why do you think this happens? I have a couple working theories: 1. It’s pure jealousy, like women who get mad that men their age are often attracted to younger women. 2. They have some latent bisexual tendencies that they’ve repressed and they lash out in a homophobic way because it’s uncomfortable to acknowledge “girly” men as sexually viable. 3. They’ve internalized all the messaging that tells them they need to be masculine/muscular/stoic/whatever to attract women and it irritates them to see guys that don’t meet those standards seemingly cheat the system. 4. They’re simply close-minded NPCs that see a man with some eyeshadow and concealer and their brains spaz out because it doesn’t suit the social norms they’re accustomed to. Have you noticed this phenomenon and if so what do you think’s driving it? I reckon you may have better insight into the psychology here than me. Cheers

Yeah I’ve noticed this and I think it’s mainly answer 3, but there’s probably a sprinkling of all the others in there too.  There’s always lots of focus in the media these days on the pressure women face to adhere to certain images, and that’s very true, these pressures are real and shouldn’t be discounted, they can often rule people’s lives in a toxic way.  However guys also face a great deal of pressure as well that is far less talked-about, because it’s less socially acceptable for men to talk about problems in general because men have to be macho and not talk about problems, that’s part of the conditioning, (it’s also part of what drives men to a suicide rate four times that of women) and also because it’s not politically correct to acknowledge that there are hardships unique to men just like there are hardships unique to women, men don’t perform as well in the “oppression olympics”.  However the pressures are very real, and those who don’t conform are sometimes harshly punished.  Often the social pressure is backed up with physical violence – although I’m not gay, I was “fag-bashed” in school frequently, because I had an effeminate appearance as a young teen, I had long hair and was skinny and not very masculine.  Most men if you catch them alone and off the Internet are not actually the dickheads that they act like in public, they’re just caving to the pressure to present a certain way because that’s how they’ve been told the world should be.  People generally accept the reality that they are presented.

Kpopalypse seonsaengnim, We really appreciate the Kpopalypse roundup – new k-pop releases, nugu alerts, how Kpopalypse introduces us to new kpop songs and kpop groups, etc. Maybe you answered this before, but I was curious how you find all of the kpop content that you review. The big groups are easy. I am more interested in how you find the middle and lower class groups. Maybe I am just stupid, but could you educate a cao ni ma? Depending on how much detail you want to go into, maybe it could even be its own blog post.

People send it to me.  I used to subscribe to a ton of YouTube channels (hundreds) and track them all, and to some degree I still do, but these days I get inundated with so many requests that I don’t even really have to search anymore. There’s a few people who even do dedicated huge lists each week, every roundup is literally only 50-70% of what I actually get sent just because I run out of time to make it any bigger.

you mentioned that stray kids have been pretty consistent this year, which i agree with -they’re one of the few groups that have released stuff i enjoy this year and i actually think they’ve always been pretty fucking good for a boy group, but i can’t really pinpoint why. could you please hit me with your best music theory nerd explanation as to why they usually don’t suck why most other kpop boy groups do? (also i normally can’t fucking stand bsides, so why is this one so good? is it the riff or melody line or whatever is it called in the background?)

Just a better melodic sense in general.  A lot of my issues with boy groups, and why boy groups in general tend to perform poorer in year-end lists compared to girl groups, is that the melodies are often just random warbling-around.  They just sort of sing in a sassy random way and throw in a few bluesy minor thirds and that’s supposed to carry the whole show somehow.  I see it time and time again, it’s just not that interesting.  Whereas with the girl tracks there’s often (but far from always) more of an attempt to craft an actual melody.  There’s exceptions to all this of course.

Sorry I didn’t think much of that B-side.

hello kpopalypse oppar,
i’m a very shy 18 year old. my birthday was last week and since then, i’ve been feeling quite honestly like shit. i’m terrified of growing up and having responsibilities to a point where i think its not normal anymore (none of my classmates who are 18 already have had it this bad), and i think it’s because teenage years are supposedly the best of our lives but i spent them studying and having like three friends. most of the time, when i’m not having any self esteem crisis, i consider myself a quite chill person who’s also decently interesting, but whenever it comes to talking to new people i’m stuck and i never know what to say. this has resulted in me never trying and basically having a lot less fun and experiences than my same aged peers, and now i’m scared that with university next year (i’m italian and our educational system is a. complete fucking garbage b. a stressful failure c. boring) it will be even harder to make new friends and have fun. on top of that, i dont have the economical resources nor the sheer talent to do any of the stuff i’m interested in, which means i will probably have to study some boring ass subject to get a boring ass job. i feel like i’ve lost all opportunities to enjoy myself and i’m off to total stress and boredom and it’s really dragging me down- any advice?

Anyone who tells you your teenage years are the best of your life, oh hell no.  I personally hated being a kid, I just felt dragged along through it all, I couldn’t wait to grow up.  Being a teenager was a slight improvement because at least I got more freedom but hormones made everything complicated and depressing plus the bullying got even more severe.  Twenties was acceptable but I think it was in my thirties when I really first thought “yeah life is pretty damn awesome”.  Today things are great.  Stick through the bullshit growing up stuff, it sucks and things do get better.  Freedom, autonomy and financial security make a lot of difference.  Also university is fucking cool – even if your education system sucks (don’t they all) it’s worth it just for the vastly improved social environment which actually makes it really easy to meet like-minded people.  Make sure you avail yourself of the vast selection of clubs and interest groups within University and find something cool to do, you will then meet cool people automatically.  Just don’t join a k-pop appreciation group or anything silly like that, you’ll be sorry you did.

I’m 24 and still a virgin. Now I come from a country which is sexually conservative so it’s not seen as a bad thing at all, but I feel bad since my friends already lost theirs & have also had relationships etc, which I haven’t. I was ignored throughout school & uni for being overweight, and now that I’ve lost some of it in lockdown I still don’t feel confident or pretty enough to put myself out there.

I’ve put my virginity status in my Tinder bio for full disclosure and I seem to match with Neo-Nazi types looking for “unspoiled” women only. The kind of guys I like are just really hesitant to take things further with a virgin for whatever reason.

It’s not the sex itself that bothers me that much tbh, just the feeling that I’ve missed out on those years of, well, “making mistakes” and thus figuring out how not to get fucked over in relationships – it’s one thing to see red flags in other’s relationships, but your own are a different matter, right? I just feel like I’m going to get screwed over by some sociopath who’ll sniff an overtly anxious, vulnerable woman to exploit from a mile away. Also I feel like I won’t be landing a halfway decent guy since they’ll want someone more experienced.

Generally, I don’t even think about all this & just throw myself into my career and hang out with friends, but lockdown is taking my mind places it normally only would go to at 4am on a sleepless night….should I be worried? Idk

– Confused Femcel

I’m a very honest person so I understand the desire for full disclosure, but it isn’t always tactically wise.  Take the “I’m a virgin” off your Tinder bio, stat.  If you leave that shit on there you’ll only end up appealing to creeps with a deflowering fetish and nobody else.  I would keep that shit completely under wraps if I were you, and avoid the topic whenever possible.  This isn’t about shame, it’s about pragmatism and attracting the person with the right attitude.  If someone directly asks you how much sexual experience you’ve had, “not a lot” is a good answer – after all it’s not a lie, and you can then make them feel rude for prying further.  Don’t worry, after the deed is done they probably won’t be too upset if you tell them at that point it was your first time.

Prettiness is very much in the eye of the beholder so don’t worry what other people might think.  I’ve been to several weddings where the girl getting married was someone who I wouldn’t stick my dick into in a million years, but she was certainly getting married to a guy who loved the shit out of her.  One person’s opinion isn’t important because there’s always another.  I think Bom in the video a few questions above is pretty and I think almost nobody agrees with me on that.  Just go out and do you with confidence, and things will eventually happen.

Am I imagining it, or is kpop getting worse? I’ve been following releases closely for a number of years now, and I swear the quality of the music is deteriorating. I’ve found this to be true both for really big groups, and my beloved nugus. (that, or I’ve just become older and grumpier. Always an option)

I’ll tell you in two months.

how do you feel about pc music? stuff like sophie, dorian electra and the sorts?

I don’t mind it when I hear it but it’s not really a go-to for me.

Hello again, Mr. Kpopalypse! Do you know some JAV drama with really fit men on it? Can you please name one of these dramas for me? I need it for scientific reasons.

I would say most of them.  The general selection of male JAV stars are actually reasonably fit guys – they’d have to be given that they probably don’t get much of a break from video shoots.  Just avoid anything with that same 70 year old dude on the front cover who seems to be in about 25% of all JAV videos ever created, and you should be fine.

I have 2 shih tzus. How come when one is leaning on my left leg and the other is resting on my right leg, they just start growling at each other???? Like it sounds like the gates of hell opening and then they start fighting each other. They literally just are asleep once second, and the next screaming “RrRrrrrRRRRRRRRARAAAAAA” at each other.

I’m sorry to hear about your bowel condition, I am no medical expert so I can’t really help you here but I hope it improves.

One of the things I find the most interesting about kpop is how it utilises certain aspects from a variety of different genres. While your opinion on some of these genres definitely seem to skew towards dislike (tropical house, trap etc.) I’m wondering about your opinion on reggae, where it seems to be more like a “it’s good if it’s done well”. What aspects of reggae do you think can improve a kpop song and what aspects should songwriters/producers stay away from? How about non-kpop groups who have infused their music with reggae e.g. The Police, Seeed?

Dub reggae is the good reggae.  Police and UB40 is the bad reggae.

I don’t know why but I always feel emotional when I listen to songs such as After School Blue – Wonder Boy and Bonusbaby – If I Become an Adult. Is it because of the melody? the instruments? is it the “pure” concept or something?

Can you give me a song recommendation that is similar to them?

I humbly come to the throne of Qrimole because I know you will tell me like it is and if I’m being a ridiculous cunt I want to know. I am a kpop ajumma, and I’m kinda legit ashamed of it. What does it say about me that I’m a 40ish years old woman and I’m attracted to these Asian women who are half my age? I blame Jihyo’s boobs, tbh. But I also really like the music, and yet I don’t ever usually tell people in the respective fandoms “Yes I am actually old enough to be most of these ladies’ mother but have you seen their thighs?” Kpop fandom already skews young unless you’ve been a fan since the 3.1415 generation, and I’ve yet to find anyone my age. PLUS I DON’T SEE ANYTHING WRONG WITH KPOPFAP. There I said it. It’s honestly kind of lonely to be a new+older fan of kpop, and seeing how others react to it make me want to just give it up altogether sometimes. So, what say you, oppar? Am I a gross kpop fan who should never come in contact with any girl groups whatsoever, or am I just a stupid old lesbian who needs to get five cats and watch the Blackpink documentary already?

Part of the reason why I do boobs posts, objectification posts, etc etc, is that k-pop is specifically designed to appeal to people sexually and that’s a huge part of the marketing, and I feel like that should be acknowledged and discussed openly, rather than pretending it’s not there.  After all how can you have a discussion about things like issue concerning sexual representation while denying that the sexuality is there in the first place?  It’s ever-present, no matter how much both the labels and fans want to hide it.  There’s nothing wrong with looking at someone in a video and saying “this person looks good”, or even “this person looks good, pardon me while I fap myself into oblivion”, I think it’s quite possible to do that AND to also say “this person deserves to have basic rights respected as a performer” and “this person deserves a fair monetary deal for their work”.  (The only real issue I have with r/kpopfap is that my posts don’t abide by their rules by sheer format, they won’t accept a “blog post” and I think they should loosen their rules around that if it’s strictly relevant to what they’re about.)  People who oppose objectification always draw a false dichotomy, as if by acknowledging the object, you’re somehow lessening the person.  I think that’s bullshit, I think it’s fine to acknowledge all aspects, and doing so is a much more holistic, mentally healthy way to enjoy k-pop media, or any media, than putting someone on some kind of pedestal of chaste perfection, which to me just reinforces the damaging, fake image that idol companies are (often) trying to sell.  Anyway I’m glad you’re enjoying the boobs posts and you’ll have a new one soon!

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That’s all for QRIMOLE!  This series will return in a month, in the meantime don’t forget to register to vo… oh it’s too late, never mind.

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