Wrapping it softly – Kpopalypse’s big boobs in k-pop guide part 6

After a two year hiatus, the big boobs in k-pop series is back!  That’s right, it’s the post you’ve been waiting for, as Kpopalypse returns to analyse the important scientific trufax about big boobs in k-pop, for the advancement of human society and tiddy knowledge!

Over the last two years since the previous guide has been published, the boobs lists have generated a lot of hate from an increasingly “woke” k-pop internet, eager to prove to their online peers that they are above activities such as boob analysis and appreciation.  However at the same time, the lists have also been receiving increasing amounts of love, and as anyone who follows my search terms robot will know, underneath the “woke” pretense k-pop fans secretly search for k-pop boobs more than ever before.  After deciding not to do a boobs recap last year, I was inundated with feedback from people of all genders and sexual persuasions saying that they missed the boobs lists and wanted the series to return.  Far from the haven of creepy male fappers that it is often strawmanned as, Kpopalypse actually has a majority-female readership that are highly interested in boob science, and recent polling by Kpopalypse shows that an overwhelming majority of readers wanted the big boobs in k-pop guide to continue… so here it is!

Documenting large boobs in k-pop is a big undertaking and no list anywhere can ever claim to be truly complete.  However I try my best to cover all bases (well, mainly second base) and bring you all the trufax about k-pop boobs in the world today.  Note that this list will only cover girls not listed in previous episodes, so if your favourite hasn’t been listed here, you may wish to check the following posts to see if they were featured in a previous episode of this series:

Bring the girls out – a friendly and informative guide to big boobs in k-pop

Big boobs in k-pop part 2 – the boobs that Kpopalypse forgot

Big boobs in k-pop part 3 – private parts investigations

Pump up the pearly volume – big boobs in k-pop guide part 4

Just like TTs – Kpopalypse’s big boobs in k-pop guide part 5

If you still don’t find your favourite k-pop girl, she was probably left out to annoy you, or she just wasn’t busty enough to make the cut.  Feel free to complain about this in the comments below or on your social media of choice.

The usual rating system will apply.  Here’s a quick recap:

Size: the amount of raw TT on offer, before other factors come into play.

E factor: E is for enhancement – have boobs been pushed up, padded, taken from flattering angles, benefited from certain presentation in dance routines etc?

PS factor: PS is for plastic surgery, and also for Photoshop.  Have boobs been enhanced using these technological methods?

Fanservice: is a bird in the bush worth two in the hand?

Fapability: a combination of all of the above, plus a dash of completely unfair and biased subjectivity that comes naturally with being a blog author.

Without further ado, let’s get started!


 

KWON EUNBI (IZ*ONE)

While IZ*ONE might be in a bit of hot water lately due to the reality TV show that created them being rigged as fuck , what doesn’t appear to be fraudulent is Eunbi’s boobs.

Easily the most requested yet-to-be-covered entrant, Eunbi definitely shows ample pearly volume which is consistent over multiple photographs and settings.  However Eunbi boobs sightings are actually very rare, as she engages in very little flesh exposure.

Eunbi’s clothing choices favour lots of high collars, layering and accessorising, which all have the effect of enhancing volume, demonstrated by the photo above.  While perhaps not as busty as Twice’s Jihyo, Eunbi makes up the only slight shortfall with better presentation.

 

AHIN (MOMOLAND)

While some Momoland performers had to be held back from this episode due to a lack of research material, Ahin easily made the cut for this post and was also highly requested by readers, plus she was a consistent poller in objectification surveys.

In Momoland, Ahin is constrained by the group’s usually questionable stage wardrobe and generally doesn’t stand out much, but off the stage she actually shows very tasteful clothing choices and is able to display lower necklines than most performers while retaining volume.

While she’s obviously getting a bit of help from the undergarments, it’s clear that Ahin still has a lot of natural volume to work with, and she probably wouldn’t get her stomach wet in an ice bucket challenge.  It’s only due to the presence of more popular members in her group that she’s failed to be noticed until recently.

 

NAYEON (TWICE)

Twice girls are always a popular list request, but the fact is that most of them aren’t anywhere near busty enough to even qualify for coverage (Sana?  Are you fucking kidding?).  This post is “big boobs in k-pop” not “small to medium boobs in k-pop that readers just happen to like a lot”.

Even Nayeon really isn’t all that busty herself despite being one of the bustier members, achieving her results largely with the help of push-up bras and clever clothing choices.

Twice don’t always get the outfits right (especially these days) but when they do Nayeon definitely shines, providing plenty of pearly volume for concerned fans to wrap softly.

 

HASEUL (LOONA)

I haven’t written about anybody in Loona here since I pointed out years ago on this list how Blockberry were inappropriately sexualising the fuck out of their most underage members (as if the “Love Choerry Motion” video isn’t the most painfully inappropriately sexual k-pop video this side of April’s “Dream Candy“), but I deleted that because I was sick of getting one email per day from a different Loona stan who couldn’t handle the truth that maybe Loona’s agency isn’t a bastion of wholesomeness.  Sometimes it sucks to be a scientist, now I know how all those climate scientists feel when they listen to Bolsonaro, but even he doesn’t stoop to the logic of “you’re talking about climate change, therefore you must be responsible”.

On the other hand, Haseul is someone who Blockberry probably could be sexualising, but mostly don’t, because they’ve been too busy making Olivia Hye do the splits or whatever.  If Loona fans want something to be mad about, forget about that stupid ballad album that their CEO rightly binned because it wasn’t good enough, and start bemoaning the lack of Haseul photoshoots.

Actually most of Haseul’s “busty” photos are at least 50% bra and padding, but she’s pretty good at it so whatever.  Nobody else in Loona really qualifies for this list at this stage so I thought I’d just focus on her a bit because she was a “no reason” sidebar girl and that affords special privileges, plus the short hair look is amazing – the new Eunjung.  You could stan worse k-pop girls.

 

YERI (RED VELVET)

Yeri is really only here by popular demand, I wouldn’t have even noticed her otherwise.  Wait, these photos ARE Yeri, aren’t they?

It’s pretty impossible to tell from any Red Velvet stage what is really what with Yeri’s boobs because her fanservice is at sub-zero temperatures and everything’s always so layered up, a common trait for SM Entertainment females.  There could be anything in there.

Really, she’s in this post too soon, I should have given it a couple more years, but you guys all really wanted her here so you’ll just have to accept my mediocre review due to a general lack of research material, which we may or may not ever get.

 

GAHYEON (DREAMCATCHER)

K-pop’s resident “metal but not really” group has six very skinny individuals who definitely don’t quality for this post, and one who does.  Gahyeon’s weight tends to fluctuate a bit and this obviously affects boob volume levels, but at her best (thiccest) she definitely meets required standards for post inclusion.

However let’s not get too carried away.  Photos such as the one above clearly show that the sides of her body are relatively constrained, which isn’t usually the case.  This is indicative of careful body and clothing positioning, and there’s definitely a lot of support happening under that dress, far from the flowing and elegant feel that the photographer presumably was going for, she looks like she’s almost having trouble breathing.  No doubt she’s also had a Photoshop workover in this official photograph.

On stage is where Gahyeon really shines, and she benefits from her group’s darker thematic elements who often demand corsets, frilly necklines and other accroutments that are very volume enhancing.  While this type of fanservice is not typically appreciated in k-pop it certainly adds a few points to Gahyeon for the purposes of this list.

 

SEOHYUN (GIRLS’ GENERATION)

It’s a real oversight that Seohyun hasn’t been in one of these posts until now.  Hopefully this lack of coverage didn’t negatively impact her career.

Or maybe it isn’t an oversight because she’s not that busty, really.  She just has a very small frame, so as soon as she wears any undergarments at all they tend to add about 50% volume just from the fabric.

She’s maybe put on a little bit of weight lately (and looks far better for it, like all k-pop women do), but even when Girls’ Generation were in their prime and she was known as the second-most busty behind Sunny, she really wasn’t.  It’s just the contrast of the very small shoulder span and the clothing choices.  I’m pretty sure about that.  Of course it doesn’t help my hard-working research team that Seohyun never does anything even approaching fanservice, like, ever.

 

BOMI (GIRL CRUSH)

Actually all four members of nugu “adult oriented” k-pop group Girl Crush are quite busty, but I’m only going to put one of them in this post so I can stretch the boobs posts out for at least three more episodes.  Gotta get that web traffic somehow, now that in this “woke” day and age everyone is too much of a pussy to link to my shit on their social media lest someone cancel them.  Don’t worry, I know you all read these posts in secret more than anything else I write, my web search data doesn’t lie.

I’m going to take a punt and say that Bomi’s boobs are real (at least for now), because they respond much as real boobs do when trussed up into something like the getup above.  Which if true, is pretty impressive.

Oh and Bomi’s measurements are apparently 36-24-35 which I’m sure is useful information to somebody out there.  You’re probably all already aware anyway – you know when a group is really just there for the fappers when you look up any one of the members on YouTube and it’s all fancams that are on an annoying 90 degree tilt that makes you nauseous to watch.  I know they do that to increase the amount of pixels used but it’s all for nothing if the result makes you puke.  I’m not going to watch it on my shitty small phone screen, and I’m not going to turn my desktop on its side, so get fucked.

 

RUI (H.U.B)

At first I thought that Rui was quite possibly big on plastic surgery, but after closer examination it became clear that her assets are quite natural and that the enhancement displayed in her Maxim shoots is mainly Photoshop plus very careful use of angles.

This conclusion was assisted by the truckloads of beach footage of Rui that exists and which was able to be pored through at great length in preparation for this post.  Rui definitely isn’t one for shying away from fanservice, and if babes at the beach are what floats your boogie-board then perhaps Rui should be on your bias list.

Personally I don’t like the beach at all, and every time I look at her that awful song of hers from last year gets stuck in my head, this really interferes with my fap rhythm so she definitely gets points deducted from her fapability score for this.  However there’s no denying that Rui is objectively a very fit and able contender for this list regardless.

 

HYEME (RANIA)

As the 67th member of Rania’s constantly rotating lineup, Hyeme is a pretty attractive person and it seems people have noticed, with her picking up a lot of work over at men’s publication Maxim lately.

It’s hard working out what’s real and what’s not though.  I can’t really imagine she’s had no surgery whatsoever, just because I don’t see people looking like this naturally every day.  Also since most of her public work is either for Maxim or Rania (which is basically just Maxim to a beat) we can’t necessarily trust the images presented to not be altered.

Being this ridiculously attractive is probably unfair on most members of the human race, so fortunately when she’s not in model mode she looks like the above.  Oh wait, that’s still really attractive.  Oh well, sucks to be ugly I guess.

 

YUA MIKAMI (HONEY POPCORN)

There are girls with bigger boobs in k-pop than Yua Mikami, but there aren’t girls with bigger boobs in k-pop than Yua Mikami who do what Yua does with her boobs.  Obviously as far as fanservice goes, Yua Mikami represents the gold standard.  She consistently demonstrates an acute awareness of what her audience wants, with clothing choices that run the full cute/sexy spectrum, and her willingness to go the extra mile to demystify her appearance has made research for this series very easy.

Yua does tend to don a fair bit of push-up for photos, but even when playing her curves down (such as in the picture above) she still out-busts a great majority of k-pop stars, and remains the only k-pop performer to cause controversy in Reddit/kpopfap for being too hot to handle.  Obviously her assets were easy to confirm, and while I can’t show you any evidence of this here, there’s a reasonably exhaustive recap of the most scientific peer-reviewed research here, here and here.

Yua’s Honey Popcorn groupmates obviously don’t qualify for inclusion in this post, but when you’ve got Yua Mikami in your team then that’s really more than enough for anybody.  Let’s keep it fair on the other k-pop groups, folks.

 

ELLIN (CRAYON POP)

Gosh, Crayon Pop’s Ellin sure hid her light under a bushel back when she was in the group.  Oh lordy does she have some tiddies, no wonder she’s so easily able to successfully scam incels as a livestreamer, in fact I might give her some balloons right now fuck it…

Oh, hi Way.  Gosh what a surprise to see you here.  Erm, how are you?  I’m good, I’m not doing much.  Hey it’s a nice day for a walk isn’t it.  I might go outside and stop writing about boobs now.  Wait, did I say writing about boobs?  I meant, um… writing about blossoms, like Ellin’s blossoming career as a broadcast jockey.  Yes anyway, must run, bye now!

 

11 thoughts on “Wrapping it softly – Kpopalypse’s big boobs in k-pop guide part 6

    • People have tried to post my content over at Reddit/kpopfap only for it to get banned because it doesn’t follow the rules. So I’m not in any great rush to incorporate any of their content here, linking shit is a two-way street.

  1. Great list as always, for the next one would you add Seugyeon from CLC (you aldready mention her but like Qri she get a boob job and her fanservice increased) and Somin from Kard(she’s not afraid to show her cleavage) ?

  2. > This post is “big boobs…” not “…that readers just happen to like a lot”
    Thank fuck we get that straightened out with the Editor’s cut of les articles d’objectivation.

    Still not sure why some of the entries are here but I can’t complain, we get a well-rounded ( . )( . ) post instead of yet another popularity ranking which looks like all the others.

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