The Kpopalypse 2019 survey of caonima action – THE RESULTS!

The results of the latest Kpopalypse survey are here!  Read on to find out the trufax!

Question 1: Hi! How are you? Answer in as much or as little detail as applicable.

The traditional starting question that all regular Kpopalypse surveydoers know and love.  Selected answers below, and my responses.

I’m ok. A bit worried about my cats. [mega wall of text edited]

I would like your advice on something. I tried to ask about it on the last Qrimole but while I was writing basically a dissertation at 1 and a half in the morning my cellphone failed me and died losing every single word I had written so far (I wasn’t done but it was, let’s just say, a lot). So, let’s do this hereeeee (I’m sorry).

I have a dear friend of mine… [oh good lord, the text walls – edited] I don’t know what to do anymore.

I know I should probably wait for her and when she is ready she will contact me herself but:
1) I’m very worried and I really think that if you are depressed talking with friends is way better than be on your own. What if her parents don’t know anything and think that she still talking and seeing her friends?? I don’t know if the reason she doesn’t want to talk to me anymore is that she is too depressed or because now that I got my master degree I’m not in the same situation as her (in reality nothing changed, I’m unemployed, still a failure here!)
2) What do I do if she never contacts me again? What if she’s trying to do the fade away? There’s a very little part of me, a very selfish one, that after 15 years of friendship wants at least an explanation. I know, as much as this situation makes me cry, she is probably hurting a thousand times more than me.

All my friends have given up, or think that if she wants to contact us she will on her own, but no one was as close to her as I was and I don’t want to give up on her or on us.
Is it very very selfish of me? Please help, I’m bawling here.

I didn’t want this paragraph to be only sad news so, on the positive side, my cousin (who I’m very close to) is getting married and I’m his witness, so I’m going to England in December (sorry, I know you don’t care about marriage, so it’s not super good news). I’ve always liked his girlfriend very much (she is smart, talented and funny), and they are very cute together. Moreover, I thought that while I was in England it might be a good idea to go and see Ian McKellen (Gandalf, Magneto etc), who I love and I want as a grandpa, on stage. So I’m also going to do that!

How are you? I hope, as always, that Stiglitz and your girlfriend are ok ^^

We’re good!

Sorry about your cats.  I can’t offer medical advice, in my experience vets just try random shit and pray.  What I can say is that in my experience the best remedy from feelings of loss from losing a cat, is getting a new cat.

Your other thing – bottom line is you can’t force this girl to do shit.  Maybe she’s just grown apart from everyone?  That would seem to make sense if she hasn’t been writing you back.  I mean I’m sure nothing’s stopping her.  You could ask the parents about it… but I wouldn’t.  If she was “in trouble” she would have found a way to let you (or someone) know, but this just sounds like the typical “growing apart” that people do as their paths in life change.  It’s also possible that she’s fallen into a hole of depression etc but you can’t do much about that either, really you’ve already done all that you can.  You can’t force change on others, people need to want to make a change themselves.  I wouldn’t attempt to contact her again, if you must make any further contact at all, I’d try calling the parents.  Don’t go into the whole story, just ask how she is and see what they say, don’t go into any detail, just mention she hasn’t been in touch for some months and that you’re concerned.  Then just accept whatever they say to you, it would give you some closure on it.  I’m amazed you haven’t tried that yet.

I’m tired and stressed. I have an SAT coming up in about a week that apparently determines the rest of my life. Also I feel insecure because the guy I had been holding out for a year on starting dating a girl less cool than me.

If you want something you gotta move quickly to stake your claim.  Not a reflection on you, maybe he didn’t know you were an option.

I’m great! Passed the retake of my exam, got rid of the anxiety about potentially having to repeat the class.
But honestly wondering if I’m falling out of kpop and stanning groups.

Nothing wrong with having tastes that change.  Most people who get into k-pop don’t stay into it forever.  I’m just into it like I’m into all music because I’m a musician by trade, plus I enjoy writing and k-pop always has stuff to write about.  A lot of my readers don’t give any fucks about k-pop really but just read for the writing… especially older readers in my home country where my sense of humour isn’t quite as lost in translation as it is to very young readers or readers in other countries.

Sill bummed about DC’s Melbourne show being cancelled, but in general life is good. Hope it’s going well for you, to!

Yeah I’m shitty about the cancellation still too.  Oh well, they better come back soon because they owe me.

my cat shit on the floor today and i had to go to target to buy carpet cleaner. also i think i need to see a psychiatrist. but i’m a lesbian and i stan loona so overall i guess i’m doing alright

I think there’s more positive than negative here.

I’m on the bus to school right now and it makes me mad how annoying it is to do this survey on the phone. My phone keeps autocorrecting everything and actually chiclitbok the Anwers is so difficult but that’s not even the worse part because i’m on the way to school and i happen to hate school. It’s Not because i’m too cool for school or something stupid like that but i always feel so tired whenever i’m in school. I never have any energy to work or focus or listen or stay awake or anything. It has nothing to do with my sleep because i sleep like 9 hours every night but i’m still tired. Like right now, i can barely stay awake to do this, it’s so annoying. And that’s not all, i always feel anxious going to school because i don’t have any friends which is honestly 100% my fault but it’s Still annoying. I can’t eat lunch at school because it’s too difficult to walk to the lunchhall and get something to eat because i’m scared i won’t have anywhere to sit, and that’s so annoying because now i’m wasting my money on buying something to eat instead of getting fred food. I used to have suicide thoughts before the summer break because my grades were horrible and i didn’t have any friends and also there were people in my class that hated me even though we had like never talked which annoyed me. Actually, I’m started to think people don’t like me because i’m so annoyed all the time. Anyways, i used to have suicide thoughts because i thought i wasn’t living for anything because no one cared about me and i didn’t have any goals in life so i didn’t see a point but now i actually have something i want to do so i only get suicide thoughts on the days when i’m feeling really emo anyways, that wasn’t the point. Actually, i forgot the point. I just needed to vent about how annoyed i am. Also, i’m sorry if my english is questionable at some parts, i don’t know what my phone has decided to auto correct.

Yeah sorry about the survey format, Crowdsignal read fucked me over with the question formatting.  Anxiety about school is pretty normal, I certainly had a lot of it in my school days and it was quite justified too as I was getting bullied a ton.  However I also didn’t have the introspection at the time to realise how I’d kind of set myself up as being a bullying target.  Wisdom of hindsight I guess.  Hope venting helped anyway, but ask yourself this – if nobody at your school is your friend, why do you care where you sit and what they think about you?

still reality tv show trash and absolutely drowning in schoolwork. so, overall pretty good, oppar, thanks for asking. also, im filing a case with my school about a cunt teacher of mine, here’s to hoping it makes him have a shit time for at least a couple months.

Awesome.  I wish I could have done this when I was in school.

I have adopted a pair of herring gulls that wait on the gutter outside my window for food in the morning, and bring me shiny objects in return. They recently had a baby, which now visits as well. The herring gulls are at war with the more aggressive black-backed gulls, and I inadvertently created a herring gull outpost in black-backed gull territory, which led to the herring gulls taking over the entire area. Seagull geopolitics can be complicated.

This is one of the greatest responses to this question I’ve ever read.

Physically? All good. My parents also miraculously still love me and my friends are still my friends so my personal life is just peachy too.

Where I’m not fine is professionally; I’ve begun doubting my abilities and whether I’ll be able to make it in my chosen career.
I’m a junior copywriter at an ad agency and this is my very first advertising job. Eight months in, and I feel like I’ve run out of creativity totally.

So recently, me and my partner (each copywriter gets paired with an artist) have pitched around 30+ ideas for an event to our Creative Directors and they’ve all been rejected. We could have dealt with that rejection until we realized that our immediate seniors (above us, below the CDs), who also joined in the rejection of our ideas, had added some window dressing to the EXACT SAME IDEAS and presented them to the Directors – and of course, they were accepted immediately because they’re personal friends with the CDs.

To add insult to injury, our bosses went off on us because they thought we hadn’t “shown enough initiative”

I’ve been staying at work till 1 am for the past two weeks writing down ideas with my partner, only to receive outright rejection or monosyllabic noncommittal responses. I wasn’t feeling bad about them criticizing my creativity, but implying I have no work ethic and don’t care about my job hurt. All this because I have resting bitch face and don’t react much?

I get it, advertising is tough and you need thick skin to survive yada yada, but what even is the POINT of this constant demoralization? We’re all going to die soon from climate change anyway, might as well be nicer to each other…..I’m just so tired. I have no new ideas and recently I’ve begun making spelling and grammar errors which I never used to do. I feel so burnt out.

I just don’t think I’m made for such a high-stress industry. I’ve never been good at “selling” stuff to people anyway, maybe I should stick it out for another 4 months to finish a year and then make money writing furry erotica or something, literally do anything where I don’t have to work 14+ hours straight daily at the least – I just don’t know.

The problem isn’t the industry, the problem is your specific workplace.  You’re not running out of creativity, you’re having it stolen from you, which is of course not making you feel like being creative is valued.  If you want to stay there, skip over the heads of your immediate superiors and talk to the bosses… but if I were you, I’d start looking for other work, and when you find it, which you will, be very mindful of the politics there and make sure that you apply the right levels of “relationship maintenance”.   Never neglect politics in the workplace.

Hello, quite good actually since Ive just came back from my vacation! Just wondering though, do you have any advice to stuck through a stressful and toxic job because it pays well and has good benefits?

Yes, look for other work (while still working).

I am tired but good. It’s cha boi again, Mr. “Airline Pilot Anxious About His Promotion to Captain.” I have been a captain for about a year now, and I feel like I’m finally getting the hang of being in command. My airline is having me fly as much as they legally/contractually can, and that’s been keeping me very busy.

That being said, I’m in the process of applying to bigger airlines and getting a move on with my career again! I’m actually traveling to a meet and greet with one airline today that’s kind of a proto-interview. If all goes well, maybe senpai will notice me and invite me in for a real interview. Wish me luck!

Let me know when you’re in my town.  Maybe you can fly me out to the next k-pop concert that I go to that gets cancelled at the last minute.

Hey Kpopalypse oppa, I’m good! A couple of weeks ago I moved to China for university which means the concentration of Korean skin care products (yay!!) and crazy K-entertainment fans (oh no!!) has significantly increased in my life as my geographical distance to Korea has decreased. The university is great, the people are great, the food is great, only the teaching style seems to be quite different from what I’m used to back home – in my home country in Europe at university students are given a lot of freedom; if we fail a course because we didn’t show up or something it’s our own fucking problem and our own responsibility, but here the professors nanny us like crazy and it’s seriously getting on my nerves… today my professor even texted all of us telling us not to go out or go to bed too late since we have class in the morning. I think the last time I heard even my mother say something like this to me was over a decade ago. What is going on. Cultural difference, that’s what’s going on.

Glad I don’t live there.  Glad to see my site isn’t banned there yet, it must be because I stan China so hard.

I’m good. My cat licked my keyboard. Does your cat lick your keyboard?

No, it’s actually one of the few things she doesn’t lick.  Probably because my keyboard glows, maybe she’s afraid of it.

Hi! I’m tired as fuck, and especially tired because I’m dealing with a crappy roommate. I know I can complain/rant/ask for advice here because I go to a white-as-fuck university where the only kpop group people listen to is BTS. Anyways, I have a craptastic roommate. I’m living in a dorm room shared with three other people, and luckily she isn’t on the side where me and my “roommate” roommate (let’s call her Y) live, and instead crappy roommate is on the other side with other roommate “T”. And unfortunately, I can create a mile-long list of everything wrong with crappy roommate. She disagrees with almost everything I say, for example she stated multiple times that she thinks that clam chowder is superior to Mexican food (I’m from California), despite me never saying anything “bad” about calm chowder, and just saying that I like Mexican food. Secondly, she is always talking about how much better she is than us. Whether that be with knowing politics, mathematics, or just general knowledge, none of us can be better than her in anything (when that is not true.) When roommate T and I talk about being in the school band in our elementary days, crappy roommate interrupts and brags about how she played piano in the 2nd grade. Crappy roommate also brags about how she’s better than T, Y and me in math, despite roommate T being in higher math courses than her. Crappy roommate is also completely unaware when she starts flirting with boys, and she started flirting with the boy roommate Y liked and hurt Y’s feelings. She interrupts possibly every conversation I’m in, or any conversation my other roommates are in as well. I was talking to the president of my damn university at an event and she interrupted me. She’s incredibly hypocritical as well, for example I’m not allowed to move her leg when it is in the way when we’re in a small space but she’s somehow allowed to shine a fucking flashlight in my eyes when I’m trying to sleep (I was considering nine types of homicide at that point.) She doesn’t know how to take “no” for an answer and tries to butt in anyways (this resulted in her burning her wrist on a pan and no longer being invited to roommate ramen night). She’s made shady comments towards me that could appear racist, and even more racist if I was a person of color (despite her bragging about how liberal she is and how she hates Trump), and she also sometimes brings up the fact that I have family members dealing with problems with alcohol to others (I told her to stop on that front, but she still mentions it from time to time.) She doesn’t know how to listen to us at all and is 100% socially awkward, which does not jive well with my 100% social anxiety, especially when she interrupts me during conversations. I’m not the only person who has issues with her, as roommates Y and T are sick of her as well. Roommate T seems to believe she’s on the spectrum. We have a lot of time between the three of us (Me, Y, T) because crappy roommate is always out super late doing god knows what (she never sends us updates) and she comes back loud at 2am (despite quiet hours starting at 10), waking the three of us up. Whenever T of Y go out with her, she always has to bring her guy friend and T/Y end up third-wheeling her and her “guy friend”. It has reached the point where T and I want to bring up these issues with her, because a lot of the time she hurts our feelings. How do we bring up these issues to her and resolve the situation?

Thank you for running this blog kpopalypse! I started reading in about 2015/2016 and your blog really helped me through high school (I had some of my questions answered by you in qrimole and during other events), and I really appreciate everything you do for this blog, as it has certainly helped with my self-esteem. I really do hope your rest of the year is super awesome and wonderful!

Cheers and thanks for reading!  Your roommate probably isn’t going to change.  Firstly I’d recommend being completely blunt about what annoys you with her.  It’s entirely possible that she isn’t aware how much she’s pissing you off, so just sit her down (with the others there too) and set some boundaries.  If that idea falls flat, then just try to be there as little as possible would help (maybe there’s someone you can swap rooms with or someone with a spare room, talk to the admin about it if you need to) or you could also try revenge which could actually be a lot of fun if she’s being completely unreasonable… but then I’m a cunt.

go fuck yourself

This response was from Poland so maybe it’s my gf’s relatives hahahaha

Also, no u

Hi, I’m here against my will answering this survey because my girlfriend thinks this is the right way to spend an afternoon. She might be right but I’m not sure yet i’ll know more by the end of it I’m sure.

Of course she’s right.  Listen to your girlfriend, she clearly knows best.

Good, thanks. Recently tried getting into Kpop again after a hard day of work because I thought it might be worth finding something to pass the time waiting for my friend to finish getting ready and remembered why I dislike it so much. Now I’m here.

Glad you could make it!  I’m always happy when people who don’t like k-pop continue to read my writing anyway.  I think it shows exceptional tolerance and good character.

Good! Having an amazing holiday in Japan with my boyfriend. He’s cycling around the world, but took 2 weeks out to spend this time with me so it’s pretty precious.


hi i’ve been great! thank you for asking. i hope you’re doing well.
i just got hired yesterday. it’s not my dream job but it will pay the bills (because who else gonna buy me those tickets to k-pop concerts???)
any good advice what to do when your new job isn’t the love of your life?

Enjoy being rich, save money, look for a job you like more.

my sister just arrived in Australia on Sunday for work. I am somewhat concerned that she will be in some way poisoned or killed by the local fauna. any tips to not dying?

  • Don’t put your hand into anything that you can’t see the bottom of
  • Yes it’s cute, but don’t walk up to it, also have an escape route planned
  • If a spot looks like it’s a nice place for a rest, be aware that other creatures probably had the same idea
  • If leaving urban areas carry at least 4 litres of water at all times
  • Exercise hazmat levels of sun safety

Good luck!

Fine. Shocked I’ve been reading this blog for one year now. Time really flies. I mean, next year is 2020. Everytime I think about it I think how we are in the Future and how it does not feel like it. Now I’m not so fine. Existencial crisis. Will these stop after I turn 20? I hope so.

Thanks for reading!  Time stopping is statistically unlikely.  Also, readers will be looking forward to my 2021 lists and I don’t want to let them down.

I’m doing alright. I just started high school and to be honest it’s pretty hard to know what to do. I’ve made a few friends, I have people to sit with at lunch, but I just feel like nothing has really clicked yet. I’m considering joining a couple clubs, but when my interests are mostly academic (learning languages), it’s tough to fit in to the formula that everyone has to do a sport and an extracurricular. On an extra side note, my geometry teacher is a rude idiot. If you don’t write down one step of work (or forget to write an equals sign), she’ll count the whole problem wrong, even if you arrive at the right answer. She also will shame kids who talk and go on long rants when she could just tell them to be quiet and keep teaching. I do have faith that things will continue to improve, but I do think I need to rethink a few ways I’m doing what I’m doing. Thanks for asking, how are you?

Having an asshole teacher really sucks, just keep smiling through because teachers get paid fuck all and the ones who take every little thing out on their students usually do that because they have shitty personal lives.  Don’t worry too much about friends, that stuff will develop in time.  If there’s no club geared toward what you want, maybe start one?

I’ve been so obsessed with figuring out what is “real” in regards to kpop idols, and what’s just part of the production. It’s come to the point where I don’t know anything anymore, and I keep flip flopping between “it’s all fake. Everything.” And “They’re real people who show the good parts of their personalities to the camera.” I don’t know how to draw a line (or where to draw it) and it’s driving me crazy. It feels like i’m constantly being lied to, but also like I’m being shown the truth at the same time. Like a smoothie that’s been blended together so I can’t see the individual ingredients anymore. It’s really frustrating, and I know I’m looking too deeply into it, but I ant stop obsessing over it.

It’s like how airline hostesses are really nice to you when you’re on the plane.  Sure, you may smell, but they’re not going to tell you.  That doesn’t mean they’re not nice people, and that they don’t enjoy the job, but it doesn’t mean that they are, either.  They have a professional persona, so that’s what you see.  The amount of fakeness and how much they need to alter their personality to fit in with the job requirements isn’t a hard-and-fast answer because it will vary depending on each individual.

Hi, I’m fine, or at least I think so.
I finally got a boyfriend and that makes me feel incredibly happy after such a long time.
I hope you, your kitty and your GF are well too.

Congratulations!  We’re good, I can hear my gf annoying my cat in the other room as I type this.  Life is as it should be.

Not too great, my health is pretty bad at the moment (type one diabetes and biipolar is a terrible funky mix) and I need to find more work. Even if things are bad at the moment, they’ve definitely been worse before- so I’m more pissed off than sad I guess.
Otherwise I’m pretty happy with my friends, family and interests.

Also as someone whose pretty active on twitter, youtube and reddit it’s so weird how kpop fans (sometimes specifically army which I also am) are seen as the worst type of fans lately?? Like I thought the internet had grasped trolls were trolls a long time ago and just because someone has a particular icon or says they’re a fan of some group doesn’t mean they are representative of them as a whole? Idk where I’m going with this since it’s like 3am. I guess sometimes I’m so used to the people I follow or interact with being pretty cool so I forget that there’s so many people that just froth at the mouth if you mention kpop because the internet told them it’s the worst most annoying thing ever.

Anyway I hope you’re doing pretty good, I forgot about magpies the other day and nearly shit myself when walking to the bus so thanks spring.

K-pop fans do themselves no favours with the general public by being very one-eyed about what they’re into and very intolerant of everything else, but of course that’s a stereotype.  Stereotypes exist in the first place because there IS always a grain of truth to them, but there’s always plenty of people outside the box too.  The best thing you can do is not be “that” fan, then everyone you interact with will have at least one example of an ARMY who breaks the mould of batshit crazy thought patterns that ARMYs are known for.

Hi, I’m fine and I hope you’re doing well. I’ve read the boob answer to this question on twitter and as a bi girl I honestly kinda feel the same. So thanks for providing A+ boob content~


Hi oppar! At the moment, I’m preparing for my taking of the upcoming licensure exams for civil engineers. Kpop and ur blog have been my go-to stress relievers at the moment. Thank you for being a great part of the community!

No problem, glad to assist!

Hi! I was fine for a while until today.
I was in a relationship for 4 years that broke apart 9 months ago, she tried two or three times to become friends again but I seemed to not be able to put my heart into it after a few days, last time seemed to work though, and I thought I was progressing and being able to chat normally for a good amount of time.
Last night I was having a few drinks with friends and she came up, (we both were part of that group of friends but she basically left when we broke up because I don’t have more friends and she thought I would stop hanging out with them if she stayed). I tried not to talk a lot for fear of acting weird and destroying the mood, but it seems like they basically ignored her and she left when she noticed it.
Today I got a biiiig ass text telling me that she clearly doesn’t belong in our circle now, that she lost them because of me and I’m ungrateful for that, and that I need to fuck myself with something big and rusty basically.

I thought I was doing an overall good job on trying to start getting along again, so yeah, I feel like shit now. Haven’t talked yet to anyone about it and you asked for it, so now suffer with me, cunt.

When people break off and say “let’s remain friends”, what they really mean most of the time is “let’s remain friendly“.  So there’s no point pursuing a “deep friendship” with them as it’s not going to be the same as before you started being an item and eventually it’s going to blow up in some weird way.  I get along just fine with my last few exes, who are honestly all great people, but we don’t hang out and talk for hours every weekend or some shit, and if we did I think things might get a little strange.  The way things work for me now is fine.

When I first got into your content, I thought that you were unnecessarily mean/patronizing at times. I think that I’ve really grown a lot lately and have become more certain of who I am and what my values are, and I want to thank you for helping me become quite a cao ni ma myself. I’ve realized that there are bigger issues in the world than being absolutely politically correct, and in honor of that, I have decided to respond to the gender question by saying that I am one of the Military Giant Cats from @GiantCat9. I hope you’re proud of me.

Yes – thanks for reading!

I’m about to start uni so I’m excited as fuck but also anxious as fuck lol. Also, my dentist wants to pull my wisdom teeth out uuuuggggghhhhh… I just hate my dentist, he always wants to do 10000 things together and as fast as possible and he doesn’t even try to make his patients feel at ease D: how will I ever survive oppar????

Just do it!  Stretching it out sucks more, it’s better to do things at once, then they’re done.

Not so great.

Have a huge procrastinating/motivation problem, I haven’t gotten any work done all week. Kind of betraying the trust of my boss, I’m getting away with this kind of shit because I’m doing this project solo. I go home every day cursing myself out but repeat the same nothing at work the next day.

I need to look for a new job at the end of this project (it ends in a few months, and I better have the final product ready by then), and for that I need to brush up my technical skills to pass technical interviews. But the time at home I feel like I have to spend it catching up on my work instead of practicing. I proceed to do no work, no technical skills practice, and am not even properly de-stressing by gaming or whatever, if I watch a variety show or something it’s just procrastination leading to a whole cloud of self-hate and “I shouldn’t be doing this” the whole way through.

I also have an SO (somehow despite being super nerdy and uninteresting), we’re each other’s firsts. We’re into like the 5th year of our relationship, and I can’t help but feel like we’re stagnating a lot. I think both of us are focusing on work (in my case, focusing on doing no work, I suppose), and we see each other on dates once or twice a week and that’s all. I feel we have few common interests, and I”m not sure even that we share the same values on many things because in our dates we talk about work and life and not really the kind of stuff that helps us bond closer, if you get what I mean? I know you think kpop is staged etc, but when I see group interactions and how many of them know each other’s habits, preferences, inside jokes etc, as well as couples I know in real life, I can’t help feel that something’s not right in our relationship. We don’t live together because we’re not rich (and to get affordable public housing, we have to get married, we stay with our family), so forget about things like intimacy too. Actually my SO used to send messages like “I’m horny” but it’s not like we could do much about that…now I don’t get anything like that and I don’t know whether my SO no longer likes me that way or just gave up for now until we get married. Speaking of that, you know how people say “I’m sure I’m going to live out the rest of my life with this person” and I really don’t know if I can say that. I also don’t like my SO’s mother, but that’s an issue for later on lol.

So talk about it like mature adults, and if we decide we’re not for each other, move on? Takes effort that I currently have no energy to provide, I guess (doesn’t it sound like such a nice excuse? lol). I want to fix work first because no money = don’t even need to think about anything else. Not looking to be rich, just to be able to afford middle-class stuff. Plus, I don’t meet any new people anyway. I do enjoy our time together and it’s not like we fight and hate each other, I just think we’re both not putting in the effort to progress the relationship…and maybe we’re both bad at communication, but I don’t know if my SO is perfectly happy with how it is now, and it’s just me who wants more. And I say I want more, but what am I doing about it? Close to nothing.

kind of 100% loser right? it’s not even hard to do what I’m supposed to work (work, practice, talk to SO), lots of people out there with no job/uncomfortable/low-paying jobs, no chance to improve themselves, nobody interested in them, but I’m just here being lucky and not appreciating it.

you don’t have to reply, in fact this is the first time I’m answering this survey, and idk why I chose to write this here instead of some reddit thread which might be more helpful but well. thanks for enduring above wall of incoherent text. if you reply, thank too, I’ll read it for sure.

I don’t get the procrastination bug that often these days but I used to.  I think the way to fight it is in little steps.  Don’t give yourself a huge goal or it’ll feel massive and you won’t tackle it because you won’t even know how to start.  Just try and do one little thing each day that you know you “should” be doing.  Then next time do another little thing, and so on.  Keep it small and manageable.  Then when you look back over a week, you’ll have all these little things you did that made you feel slightly better.  That’ll then motivate you to do more things, because you’ll remember how good you felt.  Try it and see how you go.

I’m pretty sick and kind of depressed about my dog. She’s 15 and the vet kind of gave her an estimate on how long she’ll live at max… it just made me feel worse and I have no idea how to prepare myself for the worst. I just don’t think I’ll ever be ready for when the time comes.

There’s no doubt that it’s going to suck when she dies, and you’re going to struggle with the emotions (whatever they are) when it happens.  Just remember though that there’s nothing like a new pet to cheer you up.

Hello! Looking forward to what silliness you’ve come up with… Also! I have now my Cambridge Proficiency certificate so I hope to be able to finish this without any major mistakes and show off my C2 level English! 😀 Let me know if I do? Pretty please?

You did good!  I wouldn’t have picked that you’re not a native English speaker.

I just got fucking dogpiled on twitter by army for saying Boy With Love is shit, so pretty fucking terrible, thanks.

ARMYs are mostly cunts, read this it’ll cheer you up.

Hi! My name is Axakal! I like your blog and I’m from Kazakhstan. Probably the sole reader from here.

Hello and thanks for visiting!  You were the only person from your country to do the survey, but you may to be interested to know that since its inception, Kpopalypse blog has had 5,127 visits from Kazakhstan, and 1,647 of those were in 2019.

Pretty okay. I’ve noticed that I reach a certain proficiency in most things I’m passionate about and then lose interest and move on to something completely different. I feel like this is probably the path to mediocrity but I also wonder if this is a way to be happy.

I think that’s just a normal human thing, not many people want to stay on the same path their whole lives.  Shit gets old eventually.

Hi, I just started to browse your blog, and I gotta say while your opinions are 50/50 to mine (as in, oh my great minds think alike/are you truly proud of being this fucking wrong) I rather enjoy reading your takes. Please do keep rocking on! btw is it really so easy to have a crush on your e-pal that has a below zero chance of working or am I truly pathetic and need to get out of the house and meet some people IRL

Glad you’re being entertained, which is certainly the purpose.  I’m not trying to get others to think like I do, better that they have a laugh at our divergent opinions.  K-pop fans aren’t very good at accepting different points of view in general, so my posts are partly an exercise in helping people to achieve this!

Alive so alright I guess. Started college and between classes and commuting I now have 12 hours days 😦 Other than that I’m about as okay as one can be when the whole world is going to shit.

A lot of people had responses like this, where they were worried about the state of the world in general, and specifically world politics.  Remember that just like k-pop, politics tends to go in cycles, and right now we might be in the “dubstep drop nobody asked for” phase of political thought, but eventually it will change around and upbeat bops will be popular again.  That’s not to say that the world doesn’t have problems but there’s also a lot of very smart and motivated people figuring solutions to those problems out.  There are also more people out of poverty globally and higher standards of living now than there ever have been.  Just the fact that you’re on the Internet worrying about these things is a good sign because we have more access to information and communication now than we’ve ever had, too.  Even previously unknown obscure information like who has the biggest boobs in Twice is now readily available to caonimas.  Remain realistic but positive – don’t listen to denialists, but also don’t listen to the “the world is all fucked, we’re doomed” crowd either, because that’s negative and toxic pathway to bad mental health and hopelessness… which is going to do you far more damage than Trump is capable of.  The human race isn’t going to just “give up”.  There’s every reason to be positive about the future.

Hi! I’m feeling like Kpop has been pretty dull this year. What’s the most unusual, but still high quality song you’ve heard this year?

I’m also approaching my late 20s and have never had sex. It’s not for any particular reason. Just hasn’t happened yet. I just wanted to put that out there so that any worried virgins out there know they’re not alone.

I’ll tell you about the song in three months.

No shame in not having sex.  While it’s great, it’s also not the life-changing be-all-and-end-all that it’s made out to be.  When I finally had it, it was definitely fun and enjoyable but I did have this tune play in my head for a while afterward.  Sex is fun and healthy good times but it’s also kind of put on a pedestal it doesn’t deserve in our culture.

decent. as of recent i’ve started listening to more rock/punk than kpop (actually, no kpop at all in the past few weeks. wow.), which is surprising as i’ve been into kpop for like 3 years. guess i’m legally barred from ever reading kpopalypse again, gtg delete my stan twt account. also i want to thank you for bothering to write about eric aka the potential bully. like, i guess i’ve always been cognitively aware that kpop idols are just normal people but that article kind of like,, made me face it moreso. my faves are just 20 year old dudes, pandering to fans. like, imagine having to act like a literal infant for your entire career. gross. why do people ever want to be idols in the first place (@12 year old me). they prob jerk off to kardashian type characters while their bandmates don’t give a fuck because they’re stuck w each other 24/7.

This is exactly why I thought posting the interview was a good idea.  Trust me that Kpopalypse has a ton of non-k-pop following readers, all readers are welcome!

Fuckin tired i have end of year fucking exams and a bird took the fattest shit ive ever seen on my car

I’m very disappointed that you didn’t submit a photo of the bird turd in the photo question.

I feel like a loser rn because I dropped out of uni (due to depression and anxiety) and now I’m struggling to find a job 😦

I dropped out of an IT course after I did my music one when I discovered that IT really isn’t my thing (or at least, the way they taught it wasn’t).  I was also pretty depressed at the time as my depression was undiagnosed/untreated at that point.  I did eventually find work though.  Being jobless is shitty but keep plugging away, the situation you’re in now is temporary, you just gotta ride it out and while you’re in it it may seem like you’re trapped but you’re not, just keep riding through and the clouds will clear eventually, usually when you’re not expecting it.

update time!!! i was the 3rd answer in the 2018 survey ( the one that starts w “shit!”) and im happy to report that i’m still alive!!! a few weeks ago i started college and it hasnt been as terrifying as i thought it would be. i got a scholarship for $26,000 a year (abt $38k aud), so my dad has been more chill and less strict. i found something i find interesting i can make a career out of! i’m majoring in marketing and probably minor in something to do with international shit. i don’t have any friends but i’ve made peace with it. i don’t know if i still actually want to be dead or if it’s just habit to think that.

Negative thought patters can take a very long time to change, because they are habit-forming.  Sometimes I start with old negative thoughts from years ago and then I stop myself and think “gosh where did that come from”.  The solution is to form new habits that feel better.  Glad that your life is looking up!

Good! I got my first girlfriend at age 22 by heeding your advice: I stopped stressing about dating and just did what I enjoyed and found a person who shares my interests.

Trust in Kpopalypse, caonimas!

Hello Oppar! It’s gay trampoline girl here, though I don’t do trampoline anymore. I just judge the tumbling of kpop idols like the point-your-toesfag I truly am. I’m going to college in a week, which is both exciting and terrifying. By some stroke of magic, I managed to get myself into one of the best unis in the USA (which is great! They accepted less than 6% of applicants and I’m not going to stop bragging about it! until I’ve actually been there for a little bit, and then I’ll stop being an annoying cunt. But not yet!) and it has a ~reputation~ for working its students half to death. I have to do well too because it’s currently the plan to work in academia, in math of all things (terrible employment choice, I know). I’m also super introverted and people just drain my energy, so I’m scared I’m going to isolate myself and fall into depression again. I’m not that good with change, and I’m going to be a plane ride away from basically everyone I know. I also had some pretty severe sleep problems for the last two and a half years of high school, and I’m scared those are going to resurface once the stress/workload starts rising – because if they do I’m massively and royally fucked. I barely scraped through the end of the last year of high school purely on good will from my teachers, who thankfully did give a fuck about my well-being. My parents are also shelling out a puke-worthy amount of money for tuition – even with the merit scholarship shit I managed to get – and while they’re not crazily overbearing or anything, they also won’t be particularly pleased if I don’t perform. Basically I’m pretty stressed about the whole affair because both my mental and physical health are on shaky grounds, and I know I’m about to undergo a lot of stress, even if I do my best to mitigate it (yes I’ve read your post on going to uní for kpop fans – good advice btw!). Not to turn this into qrimole or anything, but what do you think Oppar? How can I be less of an anxious bitch?

P.S. last time I sent in a question I asked you about wearing weird fashion and not giving a fuck; anyways, you told me that it would just weed out the shitty fakes from my life, and on your advice I went ahead and did radically change my appearance! It went great! Not only do I look adorable, every time I post a pic on SNS like five people unfollow me, and it sparks great joy!! I’m starting to see why you keep this blog running; annoying dickface people is massively wonderful fun, and all my good friends think it’s cool and are quite supportive. Also, people stare at me in public and I no longer care, so I’m 100% way more confident than I was six months ago. Don’t let ppl say you don’t effect positive change. Kpopalypse oppar does good 4 disaffected geek girls

They way to cope with a high-performance academic requirement is to have a robust study/work creation routine that you don’t deviate from, for any reason, regardless of how you’re feeling.  For instance, I never missed a single lecture and I religiously typed out all of my handwritten notes when I went home after each and every one, no matter what else I was doing.  This meant that when it came to exam time, I already had a level of reinforcement, plus kick-ass notes I could refer to at any time and re-type out again if I needed more help remembering how to do things.  The biggest challenge of university isn’t the work (which isn’t that hard if you’re smart), but getting sucked into all the distractions that fuck with your routine.  Treat university like work when you’re there, be diligent and don’t listen to any negative self-talk because you’re the one in command, not your anxiety.  You’re there to perform a task so just perform the task and everything else is a distraction so treat it as such and don’t give it any more of your mental energy than it deserves.

Glad I could help with your self-confidence!  Remember that people at Uni will be reacting to you in real-time, to your face.  Don’t let it faze you.  If you know you’re worth something, other people’s problems with you should always be insignificant.  Your newfound confidence should assist you in surviving the social environment.


I’m doing okay.
Greetings to Stiglitz.
May this survey with too many open questions not eat up all of your time.
A futile wish, I know, but I wanted to write something uplifting.
Have a good day, cunt.

I appreciate it!  Unfortuantely this shit is taking hours as it always does, but oh well!  I am highly determined to help caonimas!

Question 2: What is your gender?

Last survey I only had “male” and “female” because I wanted to see what responses looked like if “other” options were completely off the table, and this revealed that more females than males are readers.  This time I did a more “inclusive” version to see how many “others” there really were.  The results here:

“Other” responses ranged from:

moongender trans autistic non-binary lesbian, it/that pronouns, queer, jewish, neurodivergent/autistic, non-dysphoric, kinky, #SEXWORKISREALWORK, anarcho-communist & tankie, blocks ALL nazis and terfs/tehms, proud furry (uwu) and anime enthusiast, ask me about my feminist agenda (or maybe don’t, because it’s not my job to educate you!!)


vivi’s bangs

…and just about everything in between.  Clearly there is much diversity among caonimas!

Question 3: What Kpopalypse content do you regularly access? Tick all that apply.

I don’t actually do that much trolling of other websites, however this option was surprisingly popular, which makes me feel that perhaps I should do more.  Note also that Chuu+ was fairly new when this survey went live and may have picked up a little in popularity during the time the survey was open.

Question 4: A new Halloween fanfiction is coming soon! What format should it be?

Interactive fanfiction narrowly won the poll results, so expect something along these lines fondly!  There also is a regular fanfiction in the works, which will appear later.  Even though the RPG option was less popular I probably will create another one, but not this year.

Question 5: Frank Zappa explains a key component of Kpopalypse caonima philosophy at about 8 minutes into the following video.

There’s no question here, I just thought you might be interested in this.

I included this non-question for the benefit of caonimas who may be interested in aspects of the Kpopalypse worldview.  Hopefully you found it enlightening!  The entire interview is definitely worth a watch, by the way, whether you like this guy or give a shit about him or even know who he is or not.

Question 6: Do you like Chuu+, the new Kpopalypse search terms Twitter bot?

Most people who understood the question liked Chuu+, which is good because she exists to be liked and shared.  You can read more about her here if you like.

Question 7: What’s the most likely punishment for YG for his crimes?

Most readers felt that the handwritten letter of apology would be the most likely punishment handed down by the Korean justice system to YG for his alleged involvement in various lawbreaking activities.  The 100 hours of community service option was definitely considered by most readers as far too extreme a punishment to be likely.

Question 8: After reading the interview with Tvixxbar, do you believe Eric from The Boyz bullied her?

Most people didn’t really know the answer to this, but certainly enjoyed reading content from the various people in the kpoponlineosphere who got upset about Tvixxbar’s allegations.  Only six people who did the survey were Eric stans, whereas 31 surveydoers claimed to also be victims of Eric, so there may be more interviews in the future!

Question 9: Kpopalypse is investigating the process for importing IU’s guitar into Australia even though he doesn’t have nearly enough Dollarydoos to afford it. What is the best way he can make up the cash shortfall?

Readers felt that playing the “victim of shredding” card may be the most promising option, although nearly dying might be a bit scary so I’m reluctant to pursur this option despite the large amounts of fame and fortune obviously waiting for me just around the corner.  Linking the Patreon a lot wasn’t recommended.  If anyone knows of a livestreaming service that I can use where I can stream Wonho-approved games, but that isn’t specifically a porn cam service but rather an adult games focused service, or a service like Twitch but that is more tolerant of NSFW content, please let me know.

Question 10: Do you want “big boobs in k-pop part 6” this year?

Generally speaking most people did want the boobs post, so I will definitely return with part 6 of the post series in November!

Question 11: What’s wrong with this code? (Python 3.x)

Recently I’ve had to learn coding in Python but I’m still pretty noob, so I thought some help from readers would assist me to become better.  Thanks for pointing out what was wrong with this code excerpt so I can learn.  I will reflect to become a better programmer in the future, although probably not with a more mature image.

Question 12: The AustralianSana series recently switched from a written interview format to a podcast format, because I was sick of the half a day worth of typing that each episode of the written version would entail. Which format do you prefer?

Right now more people are still preferring the written format, albeit by a slim margin.  Since recording the first podcast version, I’ve upgraded my equipment so the next version should have some clearer sound quality, hopefully this will improve the audio version.  I’ll check in with readers about this in a future survey, and there’s always the possibility of reverting back to the written format if the audio version proves drastically unpopular.  I think the main benefit of the audio version is the extra content provided by being able to hear AustralianSana’s voice, however the written version also has one major benefit which is that you can access certain parts of the result easily without having to find the exact spot in a block of audio.  Future audio versions may incorporate question timestamps so we can have the best of both worlds.  In the meantime if you’d like your question or comment to be part of the series, you can submit them to this link, and I’m also open to people who wish to make transcriptions of the audio, but you’d have to be really bored to do this.  My girlfriend offered to do this for me one time and regretted it after about ten minutes.

Question 13: What does the error message below mean?

The error message above was generated by Chuu+, who was having a bit of an unfortunate episode where she would stop running because she wanted to sacrifice children.  Obviously I was somewhat alarmed at this and concerned for readers’ safety, after all we know what happens when robots get out of hand.  I sorted this issue out in the end with a bit of help from friendly programming-savvy Twitter user @KardOnIce who also was the one who helped me code and set up Chuu+, and she has been running error-free and homicidal-thoughts-free for the last two weeks or so.  All readers who have offspring should probably be thankful that this issue got sorted and they didn’t have to buy sword-proof door and window screens.

Question 14: What’s the most likely scenario that will cancel the next k-pop concert that Kpopalypse flies out to see?

I haven’t been having the best run of luck with attending k-pop concerts, with such events in my area running at a measly 50% success rate.  Hopefully the next k-pop group that I actually want to see has enough determination and luck to actually perform at their scheduled event.

Question 15: How do you feel about the Kpopalypse music theory posts?

Glad to see that most readers are enjoying the music theory posts, even if a large group of the readers aren’t understanding them!  Just as well that they’re being met with a positive reaction as I do intend to keep doing them.

Question 16: If every member of BTS was found out to be a convicted pedophile tomorrow, what percentage of BTS fans would still stan the group?

I’m not a mathematician, but I know enough to tell you that the “mean” is the average figure that people thought would still stan BTS, or 78%.  Fucked if I know what any of these other numbers really are about, but some of my readers probably like numbers, so I left them up here for your amusement.

Question 17: Which is the most profound new video of Kpopalypse’s cat?

The votes are in for this important question about everyone’s favourite k-pop related YouTube star – enjoy the winning video below!

Question 18: Here’s a video of CLC’s Seungyeon dancing to some shit song nobody cares about.

People searching on the Internet have been wondering if Seungyeon’s boobs are real or fake. What do you think?

I thought I’d enlist readers to help a little with my boob research for the upcoming boobs post.  As it happened, most readers didn’t actually care that much about whether Seungyeon’s boobs were real or not, as long as they got to see them bounce around in a video while she danced to some shit song that nobody cares about.

Question 19: Do you ask questions for QRIMOLE?

I wanted to gauge the level of QRIMOLE engagement and participation, as I’d noticed a slight dip in question-asking lately and I wondered if it was do with less caonimas needing advice.  As it happened, it wasn’t anything to do with this at all, as the answer to question 1 at the top of this post demonstrate – plenty of people needed my help, they were just using the survey instead of QRIMOLE to ask the questions.  I’m not sure why this trend exists, but in any event I’m happy to help readers any way that I can!

Question 20: Kpopalypse has been with his current girlfriend for over nine years. What’s the most amazing thing about this fact?

“All of the above” is the clear winner, showing that it is actually pretty amazing that my girlfriend puts up with me.  I’m noticing also that she did this survey quite a lot of times.

Question 21: If you’d like Kpopalypse to write about anything in particular please put it here and I will probably ignore it and write about whatever I want, but expressing your desire for certain content might make you feel better. This question is optional.

Thanks for all your suggestions!  A few responses:

Dog whistle concepts with boy groups cause that’ll piss off/upset many fans and it’ll be funny. Also you said you’d do it ages ago. And the fangirls don’t care about shit until it affects oppar. Actually maybe don’t do it, the fangirl insanity could be too great. Your call.

This was covered here.

I’d like to you cover fatshaming in Kpop and the music industry in general-I’m of the opinion that fatshaming is really just another form of bullying, but there are some who argue that if people don’t feel some shame to motivate them to stay slim, we’ll all just let ourselves go and have no standards (e.g., Edward Avila).

I’ve sort of let loose my opinion on fat-shaming on various posts before, such as here and here (see #7).

I feel like telling you what to write about would be pretty pointless. A lot of the fun of your blog is being like, “Oh hey they looks interesting…” or being like, “Neh. That’s not something I care about,” and not really know what I’m going to get. I tell you what to write, then you write an article I’ve already pictured in my head? How fucking boring is that? Nah. Just do whatever the fuck you want. Or don’t. Sell out and do Patreon requests. You don’t need my permission for shit, mate.

Trufax, however I also enjoy collecting opinions, plus it’s a good way to get a unique spin on some ideas.

i bet people will just write stan loona in this box

Nah, you’re so cynical.  People wouldn’t fill my survey with Loona content for no reason.

stan loona

Or would they.

stan loona

Maybe they would.

i tried to come up with something clever with stan loona, but i’m braindead so have a goodnight

I wouldn’t have worried about it – nobody else did.

A score of all LOONA songs, b-sides included, even if the scores were just “over the line” and “not cutting it”


Loona ofc


Turn into a LOONA stan account like you know you should be. Also, more fanfics!

I think I’m already far enough in that direction hahahaha.  More fanfics on the way.

Loona interview

Would love to!  Feel free to ask them.

Why are you a LOONA anti?

To annoy you.

MoAr LoOnA PlS




Olivia Hye

Also noted.


Thanks for your input.

LOONA is superior

Okay, got it.

Question 22: Look at these crazy women. Just look at them.

Everyone likes to fantasise about hanging out with k-pop stars, but be honest, you’d go insane after about a minute with these girls, wouldn’t you?

Everybody basically agreed that nobody would want to deal with Loona on a 24/7 basis without some kind of compensation.

Question 23: This is a video that I made of a 432Hz sine wave that goes for 8 hours.

What image should I use in my next “tone” video? Upload whatever you think should be used here. Must be YouTube-friendly. This activity is optional.

Thanks for your image submissions – the cream of the crop will be used in time!  Speaking of cream, make sure to keep your submissions YouTube-friendly for best results!

Question 24: Recommend a cool website for the no reason sidebar girl. This activity is optional.

Thanks for these!  The best ones will be used in due course.

Question 25: Who should the next no reason sidebar girl be? This question is optional.

I don’t know what this is, sorry.

The Kpopalypse blog has many sidebar girls, including one who is there for “no reason”.  This girl changes every year.

The chick from PinkFantasy with the creepy Donnie Darko mask. And I mean it!


Question 26: Rank the following cringe English song intros in terms of shittiness. Most shitty at the top.

Reader rankings were as follows:

The song “Not Young” by U-Kiss managed to scoop the results for the cringiest spoke English intro in k-pop, and by a reasonably decisive margin.  Let’s all take a minute to appreciate it!

Unbelievably, Girls’ Generation’s “Gee“, while no doubt containing a truly disgusting slice of k-pop intro cringe, still managed to be the least cringey of all songs included for evaluation, which just shows how awkward and eye-rolling k-pop’s English song intros really are.

Question 27: In three words or less, describe how you feel about 2019 in k-pop so far. This question is optional.

Most people were so underwhelmed by 2019’s k-pop songs that they couldn’t even bring themselves to comply with the “three words or less” rule.  I was also told to stan Loona a lot.

Question 28: This survey actually has slightly less than 30 questions. Describe how you feel about this here. This activity is optional.

I was told to stan Loona a lot.

Question 29: Thanks for doing this survey! If you have any feedback please put it in the space below. This question is optional.

This was the first survey I’ve participated in on your blog, and I’m laughing at the answer choices all the way from Texas.

Glad you enjoyed!  A new survey is solicited every six months, with sometimes shorter surveys in between!

This Crowdsignal site is full of ads and lame now. Is there nothing better out there?

I know, right?  I’m so sorry that it sucks now, if only these companies had the stringent “no ads, Patreon only” policy of Kpopalypse.  I highly recommend Ublock Origin to make your survey experience better.

For Chrome here.

For Firefox here.

For Safari here.

I want more questions. Thanks for everything and I love your blog!

Thanks!  There’ll be a short survey near the end of the year.

Hi again!

I just wanted to plead my case on using the audio version of the Kpopalypse and Australiasana interview.
1) It’s easier for you
2) It’s very nice to actually hear both of you, your arguments, your passion (ehm, Australiasana’s at least). As I said before you make a good duo, and you both balance each other out.
3) It seems, don’t know why, that podcasts are popular right now (btw, it could be a good idea to actually call it a podcast, and to give it an official name)
4) Your youtube channel would benefit from it (more people would see Stiglitz!)
5) It would be another new, different way to interact and connect with your audience

About the Halloween fanfiction. I love every interactive content of yours but we haven’t had a classical fanfiction for quite some time so it could be nice to go back to basics.

It was very nice to listen to Frank Capra’s philosophy. Thanks.

And finally, if I want to help you buy IU’s guitar but I’m kind of broke and can’t do a monthly thing, is there another (one time) way?

Have a nice day ^^

I prefer the podcast mainly because of reason 1, typing up AustralianSana’s very passionate dialogue takes a LONG time, it’s a hell of a lot easier to just upload the audio.  I’ll retain the written format for other interviews however as these are less frequent.

If you’re really broke I’d prefer that you didn’t donate at all, I don’t want to negatively affect your income if you are struggling.  While I accept and am extremely grateful for all donations as they assist in keeping the site going, and allow me to buy relevant k-pop things and bring you stuff like computer games and Chuu+, please only consider donating if you can afford it comfortably, and only donate what you feel comfortable with.  If you get richer one day maybe consider it for the future – but that’s up to you.  Unlike a lot of people who have a Patreon I’m not interested in pressuring people to donate by locking away and paywalling content, the Patreon tiers are just for fun, it’s purely an “if you want to support the site and my activities, here’s how you can” thing.

Keep doing what you’re doing. You’re the sane up against a shit tonne of crazy.


You’re pretty ok man. Been reading your blog since I was 14 in 2014. 😉
Have a chill day

Peace out

Thank you for your continued support!

No can’t think of any feedback right now, just keep doing your thing, I’m going to keep reading it for a daily dose of sanity. Oppa fighting! And as always thank you for pouring so much of your time into this blog!

Thanks!  Yes it’s very time consuming!  Note to anyone starting a blog, if it gets anywhere you’ll need a LOT of time.

Go sports

Asian Junkie don’t you have KARD videos to watch?

I’m tired from my new job and this dark background on my phone is making my eyes hurt. Also, what’s up with the terrible font on this and the first question. I hate this font, it sucks. Also, I really don’t care about Loona all that much, but I respect your opinion. But I also think that Butterfly was ear blood. Who thought it was a good idea to have them sing in that register in the chorus? And any other part of the song where they sounded like dolphins, idk, I could barely finish it one time. I was a music performance major in college so obviously my opinion on the existence of dolphin tones in songs, that being that they’re terrible and any song that utilizes them is trash, is valid and inherently can’t be criticized. There’s my rant for the day, and I hope you have a better day than I did oppar.

Thanks for your feedback!  I agree with you about the survey format and I’ll try to come up with something less sucky next time, however I’m somewhat constrained by Crowdsignal’s monetisation which has really gone into overdrive lately.  Most of the good themes are now paywalled and the pay wall is pretty high.  Annoying af.

with a growing number of musicians opting for a quiet stage, do you think feedback as part of the performance will go away?

Not completely – incompetent audio engineers will always exist!

For question 23: I’d use a picture of Lisa with a cat; there’s plenty, just haven’t any downloaded myself.
Also my condolences regarding the Dreamcatcher concert. Maybe Dreamcatcher can gift you IU’s guitar.

They owe me at least a signed album or something.

While I find these surveys better than 99% of all other interactive marketing, I’m still convinced you’re selling our info to some call center in Mumbai.

I don’t think there’s a hot demand in Mumbai for Kpopalypse survey content.  Also all my stats are public and free (as you can see) so that kind of makes selling them have no value.

I’d like to see more of the critical writing of the type we see at your end of year “Best of..” and “Worst of ..” lists. I understand there is only so much time in the day and that most of each week’s releases do not merit more than a sentence or two. Nevertheless, I wonder if it would be possible for you pick out the single best and worst of each month’s releases and write a paragraph or so on each explaining your choices. Kpop needs more intelligent and informed assessments, as opposed to either fandrooling or adolescent moralizing.

The monthly/quarterly summaries has been a common request but the reason why I don’t do it is that when the year-end list rolls around the content will be pre-empted and those lists won’t be as fun to read.  Given how popular the year-end lists are and how much readers like/hate them, I don’t want to do anything that devalues them too much.

In case you really don’t know, the crunchy thing is about how whoever writes the descriptions on Loona’s YouTube channel called Gowon’s voice ‘crunchy’. The fandom picked up on it and made it into a meme

Noted, thank you!

Nothing really of import to add, except keep on being the sarcastic, snide, insightful cat-loving caonima we all love – there’s seriously few out there on teh intergnatzes that can compete with you.
Plus you’re quite often funny as fuck.


Thanks for always being consistent! I admire the work ethic

Thanks!  Kpopalypse is working hard to keep k-pop enjoyable for the k-pop fans out there who aren’t idiots!

just a question: why do you do the objectification posts? i’m not complaining but I was just wondering why, compared to the other shitposts on the blog they really stand out
???? love your blog btw, i’ve read you for years now and your content honestly got me out of this bubble I had regarding kpop and opened my eyes to some of the darker parts of the industry ????

Because objectification is part of the game of k-pop.  I don’t like how k-pop culture in general is so dishonest about it.  Most fansites will pretend that everything is wholesome when clearly there’s a strong element of “fap material for young people” there in even the most “innocent” groups.  On the other hand there’s sites like r/kpopfap which are just blown away by the sexuality in really small things and I can’t relate to that sort of obsessing either.  My objectification posts are more matter-of-fact, they’re about saying “this is what is going on, it’s part of the machine, let’s just be honest about it and call it how we see it, appreciate it if we want, but also recognise that this is what people are being made to do as part of the business”.  This is partly so fans can see that this is just a normal state of affairs and that they are potentially complicit when they deny that it’s happening, and it’s also a way for people considering entering the k-pop game to know beforehand the sort of things that are expected of them and why, so they can go into it (or make a choice not to) while being fully informed, without thinking that everything is sunshine and rainbows.

Like youtube, pornhub, 9anime and many other sites, maybe give your own site an option for a dark theme? It would make things easier on the eyes 🙂

I’d love to, but for this I need plugins, and to enable plugins I need to pay a lot more money in webhosting fees that I currently do, the amount of money I make from blogging definitely isn’t enough to justify this right now – maybe one day!  In the meantime, there are various free browser plugins that will switch your browser to automatic dark mode, so perhaps investigate that.

You’re surveys are getting better. Did you take the time between surveys to reflect and do better?

No, I just pulled this one out of my ass, as usual.

My cat loves your cat, and it meows loudly every time I play your videos.


Have a joke:

Three logicians walk into a bar. The bartender says “do all of you want a drink?”. The first logician says “I don’t know”, the second one says “I don’t know”, and the third one says “yes”.

Thanks for pleasantly wasting 5 minutes of my day. Very enjoyable.

Enjoy your day!

I don’t get this joke, but probably because I’m not a logician.  I’ve reported it here for the entertainment of readers anyway.  Hopefully it means something.

I enjoy most of your content but I am a lazy cunt so thanks for always linking your blog updates on twitter, which is where I follow you more religiously. I still miss way too much, apparently, because I just found out through this survey that you have uploaded podcasts with queenempressgoddess AustralianSana and I am on my way to figure out where exactly right now. I have to say, tho, that my favourite blogs are the ones made just to mock the less appealing sides of kpop, namely the industry at large and the crazy rabid fangirls, so please never forget to add to those.

I have never been able to catch one of your livestreams because they are at 4-5am for me, is that the type of content I can find in your YouTube channel?

Thanks for the laughs!

All future AustralianSana podcasts will appear on my YouTube channel.

Livestreams don’t appear there, but they do remain on my Twitch channel for up to 2 weeks after I stream them, before the Twitch gods vanish them.

Yeah ok, I’ve been wanting to say this for awhile but felt kind of awkward tweeting at you – people can call you misogynist all they want, but the boob based content is clearly a net good. Obviously I can’t speak for everyone, but I – a gay – who both enjoys looking at and possesses big titties, appreciates your stuff, which is always quite accurate and informative. For example, low-cut necklines are absolutely the LEAST sexy cut (unless they have some other design thing that makes them sexier). Wearing a turtleneck or some other “conservative” clothing makes my already large boobs look like they’re out of a Wonho computer game. Spot on, fantastic content! I 100% had been waiting for you to say this, and Kpopalypse blog did not disappoint. Furthermore, you seem to be a dude who understands that delicate balance between bras being necessary for comfortable movement and also quite uncomfortable at the same time – nuanced boob comprehension yet to be gained by 99% of the men I know! Kpopalypse is truly bringing the best of Kpop boob content to the fore of the blog-o-sphere.
Istg I sound like a troll but I’m genuinely very enthusiastic about this. Seriously, reading the tits posts is similar to reading your music theory posts with years of music theory study under my belt – sure I already know about the subject matter but it’s greatly entertaining nonetheless! Never stop loving boobs oppar

Thanks for your feedback!

Not related to the survey but there isn’t a single caonima who can’t make a Mac version for try not to have gay sex with yves?

Unfortunately not.  However you could buy a PC capable of running it for probably about $20 at a garage sale.

When do you think youd stop maybe blog posts?

I intend to keep going as long as possible.

Please for the love of Yves stop naming your variables with LOONA members, your code pains me physically. Comments are great and all but if you don’t give variables and functions meaningful names nobody will be able to read your shitty code.

Regarding the error message: I’m guessing you’re using a headless browser to screenscrape data from Google Analytics or WordPress or whatever, yes? It’s possible your code has an effective memory leak if it’s doing something like opening a new browser every time it needs one and neglecting to close it. Otherwise, you probably need to increase the amount of RAM allocated to the server hosting Chuu+, as browsers can be huge memory hogs. If that’s not an option, consider either using a headless browser more lightweight than Chromium or approaching the problem from a different angle, like accessing analytics data through a web API instead of screenscraping.

I think the “sacrifice child” bit is giving an option to either kill the main browser process or one of its child processes. This is a common behavior of particularly occult operating systems. Many Linux distributions have Wiccan tendencies.

It’s okay we fixed the problem.  The reason why I use Loona girls as variables is because when I was first teaching myself Python, the variable names in the example codes I was following were so generic that I had trouble differentiating between what was actually a variable and what was a command of some other type.  If I gave the variable a name that only someone like me would give it, then I’d always remember that it was “my” variable, and not some other bit of bolted-on whatever.  I agree that it makes it harder for others though.

You’re great, I love what you do, sometimes you are a little too offensive for my tastes but that’s great too. I like how even though you are abrasive, you just brush off the haters instead of engaging with them, unlike how Richard Lewis and Thorin get really childish on reddit and twitter if you know those names.

Thanks for being you, keep it up please !

I don’t know those people, but yeah haters aren’t really worth the energy.  People gonna hate and that’s that, I’m not going to be liked by everybody.

Stan loona !!1!!!1111!!

Will do!  Thanks everyone for doing the survey, and I’ll leave you with this picture of Loona’s Jinsoul holding a stethoscope for no reason.  Kpopalypse will return with more posts soon!

5 thoughts on “The Kpopalypse 2019 survey of caonima action – THE RESULTS!

  1. Q.19 Qrimole is for asking questions, in the survey they are answering your question so they tell you their problems. I don’t think “asking for advice” is a question and maybe I’m not the only one who thinks that way

    • Asking for life advice and asking “what’s your favourite colour” are still both asking a thing, both are preferable to the “here’s my rant but there’s no actual question here” stuff.

      • Of course, it’s just what I think of the trend you noticed: some people won’t ask for help or your opinion about something, but will tell you their concerns and you’ll help them anyway, which is the same result but different approach.

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