It’s time once again for Kpopalypse roundup! Let’s check out some new releases!
Itzy – Dalla Dalla
Well, when Twice started they weren’t all that great either, so let’s just forgive them this awkward 2NE1-lite and see what happens down the track I guess.
Loco ft. Zion T. – It’s Been A While
It’s been a while since Zion T. was in anything good. In fact was he ever in anything good ever? I can’t remember. At least Loco did a song with Hyomin once.
ONF – We Must Love
Don’t get too excited, it’s not another “Complete“. It’s okay though.
Jisook – The Way We Were
Even though this song really isn’t my style it’s good to see Raina back again. What do you mean this isn’t Raina? I don’t believe anything about this until I see a doctor’s certificate.
Deepshower ft. Min – Marathon
Tedious techno crap. No wonder we haven’t heard anything from her in a while if this is what JYP was refusing to let through quality control.
Kim Hyun Joong – Why
I like how the subtitles are in French. It’s the language of love! Hey, what’s French for “I’ll attack your butthole today”?
JYP – This Small Hand
This fucking creeps me out. To you it might seem “heartfelt” or whatever but all I see here is another cult recruit.
Yesung – Because I Love You
Fuck the song, it’s the usual generic ballad shit that you’ve all heard before a million times and are now sick of – but who is the girl in this? She definitely meets required standards.
Pierce – Shadow
Usually “kids k-pop” is super cringe, and I guess this is too, but it’s actually also a reasonably good song.
CoCo – TalkTalk
…and this one is also not too bad. This week I guess is the week where the kids all kick the adults’ asses.
MJ Sunnyside ft. Han Hyeri – Good Night
If fully-grown adults insist on making music like this it’s no wonder they get so easily upstaged by a bunch of rugrats.
6band – Just Memories
Some one-take videos are less impressive than others.
Jero – Judge
I judge that this is shit, case dismissed.
Hanhae – Flashback
Jazz trap. Now that’s a fusion nobody needed or asked for.
Lafee – Hello
Just because you’ve got apples in your video doesn’t mean you’re Loona.
CHS – Seoulmong
What’s worse than listening to four minutes of boring smooth instrumental? Listening to ten minutes of boring smooth instrumental.
Koyote – Fact
Crappy 20-year old idol pop doesn’t actually sound that bad once you remove the dreadful production.
BORING J-SHITS SECTION
IZ*ONE – Gokigen Sayonara
It sucks for me that IZ*ONE exist because it kind of feels like writing about j-pop.
IZ*ONE – Neko Ni Naritai
Anyway la de da let’s just move on.
Snuper – Weekend Secret
It’s actually better than their last few songs for the Korean market. How sad that it’s come to this for Snuper.
FTIsland – God Bless You
Sure it rocks, but I would never accept this type of half-assed emo rock from any western group so I’m not going to accept it here.
N.Flying – Stand By Me
N.Flying’s half-baked emo rock is better than FTIsland’s due to some decent keyboard action.
BONUS RANDOM VIDEOS OF THE WEEK
Longest k-pop girl group/boy group days since last comeback
Elite caonima YouTuber isaymyeolchigr returns with more quality content! Shed a tear for the winners.
That’s all for this week’s roundup – more next week!