This post summarises reader picks for the 2018 favourite k-pop songs list and 2018 worst songs of k-pop list!  What did readers think were going to be on the lists?  Read on and find out!

Question 1: Hi! How are you? Answer in as much or as little detail as applicable.

The usual introductory question is mandatory for all Kpopalypse surveys, because Kpopalypse cares how you are!  Here’s some selected responses and replies.

Hello. I’m fine, thanks.
I’ve enjoyed reading your blog for quite some time, but I’m wondering now why I’m answering this survey. It feels like a crossing a line of involvement that feels a bit weird. 🙂 Or I’m just thinking too much.

You’re just thinking too much.  I like the idea of the blog being “interactive” to some degree.  It’s part of what makes user-created content like blogs a little different to the horrible, boring world of “journalism”.

Freshly steamed after watching yet another video of top girl groups without mention of T-ara.

I agree that this is unacceptable, unless the list is called “video of top girl groups that are not T-ara” or something similar.

I hope you’re doing well. As for me…I feel like shit. I’m currently battling extreme seasonal depression (I have it year-round but it gets really bad this time of year.) Do you have any tips for handling it because this wave has been very difficult to ride out.

Play computer games where they simulate a different season.  Might help.  Might make it worse though.  Fucked if I know, see a doctor if it gets too hard to handle.

i don’t know what’s happening to me anymore. i’m such an irresponsible idiot and i blame kpop for just being on my mind 24/7. i can’t do this shit anymore

It’s okay to have a break.  A reasonable percentage of my readers don’t give a flying fuck about k-pop and just follow my writing for the humour.

Hello, I am a fellow human being just like you. I want you to know that the feelings that swell within this human are of immense pleasure and happiness to convey such feelings to you. I want you to know that we together as humans that we both are will prosper onward and forever for the foreseeable future. 🙂

Sounds good, thanks!

Hello. I’m way better than I was last year. I’m still a little tired because my university’s term is ending and I had a specially demanding assignment to hand in this week. But now that I was actually able to sleep I feel so much better.
There’s still a girl from my class that after sleeping over at my house one night decided to follow me around all the time. The worst part is that she’s really annoying and complains a lot about everything. I can’t avoid her because we take the same bus together and it’s the only one with a stop close to my home.
I also suspects she has a crush on me even thought she’s already dating someone. And I know she considers me a good friend, which I find weird since we just met this year. I just don’t know what to do, I can’t tell her to fuck off because I’m too polite for my own good.
Regardless of that, everything else in my life is getting better so overall I’m fine.

Just find out what she’s into and tell her that you’re not really into that shit.  If she’s a BTS fan tell her that you think BTS suck, that’s a more polite way of telling her to fuck off than just saying “fuck off”, I think.  She’ll probably leave on her own accord!

I’m good!! Right now I’m working on fixing the negative aspects of my personality — being brutally honest when no one asks me to, reacting flippantly to the interests of my friends, and lashing out at my friends when being wronged/hurt. I’ve lost a lot of friends because of my behavior, and after blaming it on them every time, I’ve finally looked and realized that its actually because of me. But I won’t take all the blame, I’ve actually cut these friends off for very valid reasons (being racist to me, saying homophobic things, being bigotted in general, invalidating my trauma etc.) however after carefully analyzing these situations I realize that yeah I had the right to be angry, but lashing out isn’t the best thing to do, especially if it’s at the people you hold dear to you.

I’m autistic and honestly struggled a LOT with social interactions and went through various personality changes through to trauma and just my mental illnesses (not autism) just in general fucking with my thought process.

At the time I thought along the lines “just be yourself and if people don’t like it they can just fuck right off” however I realized that despite this statement is helpful, it doesn’t hold true if you act like an asshole.

So yeah, I’ve been focusing on being less negative and keeping my mouth shut on topics that don’t concern me all under the guise of being unabashedly honest.

I used to think holding back all your emotions and feelings about topics and people (especially people) made you “fake.” I.e. being nice to people who you hate. I used to never understand why my friends would hang out and talk to people they don’t even care or just flat out dislike. I would say “why are you hanging out with them? tell them to fuck off and let em go.” But now I realized that’s just not how social interactions work. By following my own advice, I’ve scared my friends away from wanting to chat with me and earned myself a bad reputation amongst other friend groups.

I’m now carefully analyzing my words and actions interacting with new people and honestly it’s not as hard as i thought it’d be. So far the results aren’t immediate but it’s a step.

I hope from this practice I can learn to become someone whos less like a spiteful narcissist and more like someone who can make people feel safe and genuinely fun to be with. Im 18 so I have time so yeah

if you read all this thank u bro

While it’s definitely good to be yourself and to love who you are, that shouldn’t imply uncritical acceptance or a lack of standards –  it’s also good to make sure that you’re someone who is actually worthy of self-love.  Also while it’s good to not compromise on certain things, there are other times when compromise can be beneficial.  You’ll work it out!

I really am an Attack Helicopter despite my response to the next question.

Apologies for marginalising you.  I will reflect and return with more inclusive postings.

I’m triggered by question 2 on the survey, although that might be because I sexually identify as the chin turret on an Apache Helicopter, not the whole helicopter.

I can’t keep up with the ever-changing rules of political correctness.  I guess I just have to be problematic.

I was fine until I saw that your second question on this survey marginalises attack helicopters, and those who identify as such. I have a friend who has been living as an Apache for three years now, and it will be VERY disappointed to know that not all Kpop sites are as progressive as Asian Junkie oppar is.

Kpopalypse is out of touch with today’s progressive k-pop fan communities.  Please visit Asian Junkie for all your progressive, woke k-pop needs.  Here’s a link so you can access his site easily with just one click, please give him lots of web traffic and don’t forget to click on his advertisements!

Hey Kpopalypse, pretty shit. I’m still clinically depressed after 6 years of having an unsuccessfully treated personality disorder, while also trying to make it through my third study. I think this is the right one but I still suffer from inertia most of the time. I refuse to take pills because I think they’re garbage. I won’t bore you with details and stories about my fucked up psyche and I just want to say I really enjoy reading your blog.

Cheers!  Don’t forget to check your vitamin levels.

fuck off cunt

Thanks for doing the survey!

I just read your haja article and am now slightly bummed I didn’t go. Might have been fun.

Well, it would have at least given me someone to talk to if you came up and said hello.  Apart from one drunk girl who tried to pick me up there wasn’t a lot of conversation to be had.  Mind you besides the balcony it was too loud to talk anywhere anyway.  I do recommend going next time (it sold very well so I can pretty much guarantee they’ll do another one).

Hi! Throughout the year, whenever some shit happens I think, “I’ll rant about this to Kpopalypse-oppar at the end of the year.” But whenever this survey rolls around, my life is pretty okay. It’s comforting filling this question out, because it reminds me that most things are going to be okay.

Glad to make you feel comfortable!

School makes me want to tear my hair out follicle by follicle. I hate college and I hate my roommates and I want to quit my stupid job. I’m supposed to writing a fucking essay right now but procrastinating with a Kpopalypse survey is infinitely more fun and rewarding. I hope you’re doing okay!

I’m good!

Doing okay. My flight back from the Thanksgiving holiday got cancelled so that kind of sucks but I can’t complain since my life lately is amazing. I just moved to be by my boyfriend and my job isn’t anxiety inducing like before and I have enough money to make me happy. The only thing is that creeping feeling of emptiness that comes in sometimes…like is this it? I think I get why people have kids– it’s something to do if you only made goals to last the first 30 years of your life….

Kpopalypse will never have kids because I don’t think the world is ready for the kind of children I would produce.  Glad things are working out!

I have the results of my first set of professional exams coming out on Thursday, so I’m pretty anxious. I’m also currently in the process of trying to decide whether or not I think Jacob Collier’s music is just pointlessly wanky enough so that I can use it to study to for the next set/inevitable resits. You see, when I’m studying, I need at least enough 1 genre change per minute or I will get bored and fall asleep. Alternatively, I could challenge myself by studying to BTS piano compilations, because what’s life without a little danger? Tough decisions, as you can see. Also, I once filled in my gender on an official university survey as “attack helicopter”, which would probably get me told off now because you now have to list your pronouns as standard on your email signature if you’re employed by them. I don’t know what the official pronouns would be for an attack helicopter, but I do know they go WHIRRRRRR and TKKKKTTTKKTKTKTTKTKKKKKK so I guess it’d be one of those? I guess if I was actually an attack helicopter, I’d know. WHIRRRR. I mean, hi. I’m an actual human being. I don’t have machine guns attached to my body. I’m just procrastinating, as usual.

If you need quick genre changes, I recommend this song:

Hi, I’m feeling a bit lonely and sad because I think that I’m probably gonna die alone, single and a virgin.

Statistically unlikely.  The last one is easily fixable, the other two not so much but don’t worry, I thought the same thing once!

I’m good! Just came out as a lady lover, you’d think I’d realize it sooner after looking at your boob series for the 24th time.

Glad I could help with this important development!

Hi! I’m exhausted so I came onto your blog to unwind and laugh at some asshole making fun of how trash my favourite groups are.

Happy to help!

Hey, I’m doing quite good in general. However I met a guy on the train today who started a conversation with me. He started out with small talk but quickly went on to ask me a bunch of really personal questions and wanted to and meet up. when I told him that I didn’t want to he kind of refused to accept that and just said that he’s gonna try to convince me otherwise when we meet each other on the train next week, idk maybe that’s nothing but it kinda rubbed me off the wrong way. Anyways, sorry for rambling, how are you? I hope you’re doing well.

I’m good.  This guy sounds like a mega creep, be careful and prepared.  Try these useful tips!

Currently feeling awful due to period cramps. Boobs hurt, stomach and back hurt, craving something salty but there’s nothing salty in the fridge. Also impatiently waiting for albums to be delivered that I ordered 6 fucking weeks ago. Otherwise I’m dandy.

I’m glad that it’s not just Kpopalypse who has to wait forever for fucking albums to come.  I was beginning to think YesAsia had a personal vendetta against me.

Hi! I’m okay. I’m honestly feeling a little directionless. I’m about to finish my undergrad, and I’ll be taking a gap year afterwards to figure out if I want to continue with grad school. I just don’t feel the passion for my major like I did when I started. My peers are super enthusiastic about it, and I feel bad for not being able to match their enthusiasm. I’ve been in school my entire life, and I’m feeling less and less excited about the prospect of at least five more years of intense, expensive school with few direct employment opportunities afterwards. Despite all that, school is good.

That’s probably a sign to change directions.  You might be able to swap to something else related but more interesting (and that will make you more employable).  Look into it.

Not really good.

I’ve been drifting apart from my high school friends a lot. I don’t run in the same economic circles they do, and come from a more conservative household, which means I can’t really which means I can’t really blow big amounts of money to hang out in bars or clubs at 3 am. My hobbies are also really solitary (aka I’m enough of a fucking loser to listen to Kpop lmao)

They like me, but my constant refusal to hang out means that they don’t bother to ask me out anymore, even if it’s for hanging out during the daytime (which I definitely can do). So they just meet up and I don’t even know about it until I see it on Instagram – and they outright lie to me about plans they have. I can’t even be too mad about it because I know it’s partially my fault for ignoring them during my prolonged depressive spells in college, but I just don’t know if I’ll reconnect with them on the same level that we used to be on as teenagers.

Apart from very short periods in my lifetime, I’ve never been the kind of person with more than 1 good friend at a time. I’ve somehow managed to keep longterm friendships with 3 other people, but they aren’t in my city currently and may not ever come back. We stay in touch over text, but messages can’t hang out with me. One friend only comes here one week a year on holiday, so I only feel less shitty 7 days in a year.

Even then, I’m just not the kind of girl who screams or laughs or giggles a lot. My friends tend to talk about deep things with me, and goof off with other people. I love talking about deep things, but I’d just like to have one friend who doesn’t treat me with kid gloves. I like banter, too.

My workplace is full of misogynists so there’s no chance of me making any friends there either. I just feel like I’m constantly auditioning for a part in a group of friends, and never quite making the cut.

TLDR – fuck that overrated TV show F.R.I.E.N.D.S

I think it’s okay to move on from people and things.  I also think you shouldn’t worry about reconnecting, or not.  I’ve got friends who I haven’t seen in a long time but I still consider them friends and would still talk to them tomorrow if I met them out somewhere – but I’m so busy doing my own thing that I can’t really blame them that this hasn’t happened, and our lives have moved in slightly different directions, I think that’s fine.  It’s not a personal reflection on them, or even myself.

I’m fine, how are you? I’m actually a little nervous, since I’ll be uprooting myself from Australia to Japan in a month or two. I’ve spent the better part of my twenties in Australia, and grew a lot as a person here, and I will always be grateful for that. However, immigration has become increasingly hostile towards people like me and I feel very unwelcome in this coubtry these days. It bothers me so much that I have decided to have a drastic change of environment, hence the big move. My long term partner and I are parting ways amicably because he has set his sights on the US (barf) and he feels the same way about East Asian countries as how I feel about the US. It is unfortunate how two people can care deeply for each other yet want completely different things. I do hope our paths will cross again in the future. For now, I am anxious, excited and seeking more escapism from K-pop until the big move arrives. Oh, and enjoying what I can of Sydney as well. I will always have a fondness for this city. How about you? Looking forward to anything exciting? Thank you for doing such a good job on the website, by the way.

Thanks!  Good luck with your move, but consider that by moving for this reason you’re kind of giving the bigots what they want.  I’m not saying “don’t move”, but rather “make sure you’re moving for reasons that matter to you, not just reasons that matter to other people”.

Went to a kpop concert + afterparty. Have never been this embarassed for my friends behavior and I’m also never doing kpop parties again. Lame as fuck. During the concert itself, my friend was too desperate to get noticed and complained a lot when she didn’t get acknowledged by her unnir (right up until the end of the concert and after that she wouldn’t shut up about it). She even threw stuff on stage that the artist didn’t know what to do with and got pissy her gift got passed on to the manager. Others looked really annoyed with her aswell. Next time i’m going alone jfc.

I always go to these things alone and have a good time observing the madness around me and not getting involved!

It’s 1:19 am, idk why Im here, I don’t even read your long ass posts (but enjoy your comments in aj) Im so hungry Im starting to have nausea but to comfortable to get up

I’m glad that you like my comments there… well, the ones that he doesn’t delete, anyway!

Pretty good. I’ve recently discovered the pleasure that comes from prostate stimulation, so I’ve been having a lot of unprotected sex with men in a very gay city. I’m kinda scared that all of this unsafe sex will bite me in the ass (pun intended), but it’s much more fulfilling without a condom.

Yeah it might.  Be careful out there!  Or should I say “in there”?

Depressed thinking about how capitalism has been around for less than 1% of our planets history yet it’s on the way to destroying the earth entirely.

Don’t worry, it won’t destroy the Earth.  The Earth will be fine!  It’s only the people on it that might be struggling a little.

Ok normally I have a lot to say in these but surprisingly I don’t have much to say this time, except that the few times you answered these for me you offered very nice advice, to which I say thank you! Your advice helped me a lot with dealing with other people (also btw that guy who stanned loona who was super cute? got a girlfriend and it isn’t me ? i’m not really too concerned about it, as I’m probably going to go to college and he isn’t!) and sometimes it provided a lot of laughs, so thanks 🙂

Glad I could help!

have you seen international master (chess) ulvi sadikhov? because i think he’s insanely hot and none of my friends agree

I’m not really seeing it, but then I’m not into guys so I guess that’s to be expected.

I’m great! Thanks for asking I just went to my fifth concert this year – Ms Lauren Hill made us wait for two hours and the whole show was a mess but anyway – so next year I want to go to a kpop concert that can top Monsta X (my only kpop show so far) so I’m curious do you have any suggestions? Also do you have any plans to make a post about concert/festival etiquette? Because It seems that for most kpop fans it’s their first concert ever and that goes about as great as you can imagine

I hear Blackpink might be in some people’s area soon, why not go to that?  I haven’t really considered a concert etiquette post, if enough people think this is needed and can tell me enough horror stories about k-pop concerts I might consider.

Hello! I’m gay trampoline girl; I definitely hit you up in qrimole if my question went through. I’m having an alright time of it other than the fact that I’m still in perma-sick mode – hoping to get a gf sometime soon. Wish me well in my endeavor to find a cute girl!

Good luck from Kpopalypse!  Everyone please wish gay trampoline girl good luck!

Celebrating yet another year as a loyal caonima so pretty good. Have some big stuff coming up next year – long term boyfriend will be out of the country for 14 months from June and I won’t see him more than 3 times over that period. So right now I’m happy but it’s somewhat bittersweet thinking how different this time next year will be without him. Any good coping strategies would be appreciated here. Also, thanks as ever for delivering quality content across a wide variety of topics this past year. I will fondly anticipate next year.

I recommend fapping and lots of porn (of whatever type meets required standards).  That’s how I get through such situations.

PUBG Mobile just got an update where you can get rewarded a dance emote inspired by Momoland’s Bboom Bboom. Better yet, it’s not a reward you need to pay to earn. So I’m pretty stoked.

Please tell me which dance in the Vikendi pass this is (if it’s in there) so I can pointlessly grind for it and waste my life thx.

why do you care about how i am? i’m only here for the survey

I’m grateful for all my readers so naturally I care about them!

Hey! Kinda shitty cause I’ve completely reversed my sleeping schedule and I have no idea how to fix it. I’ve tried staying up until night but then I just end up not being tired anymore but in the day I end up tired as shit? I can’t force myself to go to sleep cause that never works so I’m just stuck with no way to actually fix this problem. Google was no help and I’m wondering if I should go to a doctor for this. But then my actual doctor is about 2 hours away and my uni health office can’t actually do anything since I 1) don’t have my insurance card and 2) they can’t give prescribe me anything so I would just be getting advice. Also my dad has a tumor on his parathyroid so he’s producing an excess of PTH which terrifies me cause I’m a bio student so I know in depth all the terrible things that are/could be happening to his body. He’s apparently had it for a while so even though he’s removing it he’s still going to have effects from it and I just don’t want to lose my dad any earlier than i have to. Bonus, I’m failing college but hey at least I’ve got a job at Popeye’s.

If your doctor is 2 hours away, go regularly and take public transport to get there.  Soon you’ll find yourself getting very sleepy on long boring trips – problem solved!

Pretty upset none of my answers made it in last year but I think it’s because I’m boring. So I guess I’m upset about that.

I will send you wishes to have more interesting responses in the future.

Everytime this question throws me off and I don’t know if I should be honest and write a huge paragraph how shit everything is or just move on to the next question.
Anyways, please more cat content, Stiglitz is so fluffy.

I’ll see what I can do!

Question 2: Please tick this box to prove that you are not an attack helicopter.

There was a box in the survey.  You had to tick it to prove that you were not an attack helicopter so that you could complete the survey.  As attack helicopters are not known to tick boxes I felt that this was a good test to make sure that there were no attack helicopters amongst you.  Sorry again for not being inclusive.

Question 3: What song will be #1 on Kpopalypse’s favourites list for 2018?

This is what readers thought the Kpopalypse top 30 was going to look like.  The right-hand column shows how many votes each song received.  The colours show where each song actually ended up.  Blue means it was on the top 30 list, the lighter blue shade means it was an honourable mention, and pink means that it was a dishonourable mention.  Songs with no colour did not appear on any list.  Overall these guess were very good quality, although readers’ Twicedar clearly wasn’t working very well – the four releases by Twice are in exactly the opposite order of preference here to how they appeared on the final list!  Also, nobody guessed the #1 favourite.

Question 4: What song will be #1 on Kpopalypse’s worst-of list for 2018?

Here’s the same selection for the 2018 worst-of list.  Same colour rules apply, with the additions that dark pink are songs that actually got on the worst 30 list, and purple indicates the actual Kpopalypse #1 worst song of 2018, which quite a few readers guessed correctly!  Jennie’s “Solo” was the hot favourite for the worst-of list, and BTS also made a strong showing, but managed to find themselves on no list at all, except perhaps an upcoming list of “songs Kpopalyspe couldn’t be bothered listing in 2018”.

Question 5: What song that is clearly complete bullshit will Kpopalypse inexplicably like enough to put in his favourites list anyway?

Here’s the list for songs that readers hated, that they thought I may have liked.  Readers’ ability here to pick my bullshit music taste was generally impressive!  I’m not sure why Twice’s “Yes Or Yes” got so much focus here, maybe it was the song’s deep meaningful message.

Question 6: What song will make you completely CANCEL AND DISMISS Kpopalypse if it turns up on his worst-of list?

Answers for this question were extremely varied, but basically this is a list of readers faves plus songs that you were all paranoid that I might have shat on, with Loona fans leading the pack of worried k-pop followers.  Only one reader picked a song that actually made it onto the 30 worst of 2018 list, that was Lipbubble’s “Yellow Pink“, so I guess that means I only need to deal with being cancelled and dismissed by one reader this year.  Sorry, I’ll work harder next time!

 

Question 7: If you’re salty that Kpopalypse didn’t review a certain k-pop song in 2018, you can request it here. Your request may (possibly) feature in a future “2018 clearing house” post, where it will be reviewed in the time-honoured lazy written-while-taking-a-shit style that Kpopalypse is known for. You can nominate as many songs as you want, or skip this question if you want. Name both artist and song. Feature tracks, released singles and songs that made it onto music shows only. No OSTs or Christmas songs. Thanks!

Thanks for all your suggestions!  Most eligible suggestions ended up in one of the three clearing house posts for 2018.

Question 8: If you have any feedback for Kpopalypse, don’t waste your time putting it here, we all know Kpopalypse doesn’t listen to feedback anyway. Why not put something actually interesting here instead? You can skip this question if you can’t think of anything. Thanks for doing this short survey!

Below are some of the interesting feedback/non-feedback items I received.

Do you type this fast when you write your articles?

No.

I think (I hope) you’ll like this:

Thanks!  I hope those cats consented.

I don’t have very much to say in the way of feedback, but I just want you to know how much I appreciate you. I discovered you and Anti K-pop Fangirl (:'() way, way back in 2012 during the T-ara ridiculousness, and I’ve kept up with you since. It must take a lot of time to write all of the stuff that you do, and I never fail to laugh and enjoy myself while I’m here. It’s also nice to hear the thoughts of an adult within this community that seems to get younger with each year that passes. I’m probably just getting old, though. Either way, thank you so, so much for all that you do, Kpopalypse!

Thank you!

Since kpop already capitalises on the vague summer and obligatory Christmas themed comebacks, my suggestion is that they next start to cater to the untapped market that is Easter. Imagine a group like EXO dressed to bunny costumes similar to what Dahyun wore in TT MV and at the same time trying to convey some deep romantic ballad vibes. I would pay for SM to do that.

Shhh… keep this quiet, or it may actually become a thing.  Then I’ll have to do an annoying Easter roundup every year as well as a Christmas one, and nobody needs that.

I’d just like to say thanks for making/working on this site. I started visiting a year ago when “isaymyeolchigr” posted your honorable mentions 2017 on Youtube and I’ve been coming back ever since. Whenever I feel like getting a dose of reality or a good laugh, your articles never disappoint. You also turned me towards new and old songs I like and may have missed otherwise. So from middle of nowhere Canada, Thanks.

Thank you for reading!

I honestly find the life advice you give in qrimole quite helpful. I think it’s really considerate of you to go through so many messages from struggling people and answer them beautifully and honestly.

Thanks!  I try to help people, I certainly don’t know everything and I’m sure my advice is wrong as often as it’s right, but being an old cunt has its advantage that when you’ve been through a lot of stuff you kind of get some idea of how to handle it.  I wish when I was younger I had a Kpopalypse to ask things of.

Did you know that reading you blog prevented me from becaming a crazy fangirl and a feminist obsessed with being politically correct? I still hold similar political views but I became more tolerant and probably less annoying for anyone else. So thank you for your unapologetic way of blogging.
There’s a chance that you already hear this a lot, but regardless of that I just wanted to tell you.

Thanks!  I do hear it sometimes, but not that often.

I’m currently editing the 2019 UTS Writers Anthology and if I you want to give me some free promo I’m down for that. Come read some pretty cool student work!

I don’t really know what this is, but interested readers should check it out!

Wombats poop in squares because of the structure of their intestines. If you were to inflate a wombat intestine it would stretch irregularly to form squares.

Trippy.

There’s a flower called a “bee orchid” which looks like a female bee’s ass so male bees will get confused and fuck it, getting pollen on themselves. After realising that the orchid is fake, they fly to another orchid and fuck that instead, pollinating it in the process.

That’s pretty clever.

Hey I think you’re pretty cool! Over time I forget more and more about the boobs posts and your pedantry and all the other things that make you uh…”problematic” and you become just a reliable source on kpop commentary that’s not blind praise. Keep doing you man.

Cheers!

Two years ago, I looked at J-Hope’s astrological chart and correctly predicted, based on the time of birth I estimated from various factors such as BTS’ debut, observations of his stage personality etc., that J-Hope would release his Mixtape in March 2018, when his progressed moon crossed his ascendant at the exact degree. A lot of people said that I was wrong at the time, because they thought he was surely about to release something in early 2017. They were wrong. I was right. I’m like, ESPN or something.

Cool, can you give me some lotto numbers?

Overall I enjoy your writing a lot. However, I think that sometimes the way you joke about tragedies like suicide/death isn’t right. I you won’t ever change that and I like to read your articles but even if humor is a coping mechnism for you, this is something I find really distasteful.

I give all readers permission to joke about me when I die.  In fact, if at any point in my future I am able to anticipate my own death (for instance, if I start developing terminal ass cancer) then I will schedule a post that will be nothing but jokes about how I am a dead k-pop blogger.  There will be instructions written in my will for my next of kin that explains how to log into my site and make this post on my behalf at the appropriate time.

hey thanks for being a petty cunt and making this site so fun and informative especially with how other kpop english news sites are shit :)))

Thanks!  Yes I agree other k-pop websites are inferior (but then I may be biased), I’ll keep doing my best!

I like this website. I read it while I take a poop. 🙂

Poop an extra long one for Kpopalypse!

I love making jokes about being gay even though I’m actually pan. These beautiful opportunities I’m given each day to make dumb puns about my sexual preferences are a wonder and I will forever be grateful. Thank you kpop, for helping me to realize that men and women are almost equally attractive in my eyes.

I think k-pop (like pornography) is useful sexual discovery for a lot of people.  I know there are people who have had lesbian awakenings because of my boobs posts.  That’s why I won’t stop doing them and why I won’t apologise for fap content.

I have that sinking feeling that a particularly rancid fart I just did may have left skid marks on my boxers, but I’m too afraid to check.

I hope you’ve checked by the time you read this, or that stain will be hella tricky to remove.

Tinnitus is real and it does not forgive. Protect your ears. Thank you for keeping me entertained. Stan Loona.

Wise words.  I think I have extremely mild tinnitus, I should have it a lot stronger but I don’t, because I wore earplugs to a ton of shows that I performed at.

LOONA Chuu will be supreme world leader by 2020

Let’s hope so.

It’s so embarrassing that you still say faggot. I don’t think you’re a homophobe but it honestly just makes you seem like an dated old millennial who read too much Something Awful as a tween. I cringe so hard, dude. You are smarter than this. Or maybe you aren’t?

Most gay people I know personally say it.  Nobody has a problem with that.  If only gays get to say it then that’s fine, I’ll give some dude a handjob behind the bike shed if it means that I get to keep the word because it’s honestly useful and freedom of speech is probably worth putting in a little elbow grease for.  Also just FYI I’ve never read Something Awful.

Did you know that Nazi physicists rejected Einstein’s theory of relativity because it was “too Jewish”. I love how humans have never stopped being full of absolute catshit winesacks.

Actually I did know this.  It’s funny that if the Nazis were actually a little less racist Hitler’s world domination plans probably would have worked.

Did you know Chinese netizens use 大大 and 太太 to refer to big accounts? Ie artists, content creators.
With that said, 辛苦你了, 大大

Thanks!

I’ve finally been able to get over my ultimate bias, Choa, leaving. For the first time since the Heart Attack era I have a new bias: Jeongyeon. I feel like Jeongyeon is Choa’s spiritual successor that she created by Koreanizing the DNA of AKB48’s Goto Moe. Either way, I am grateful!

Glad that’s working out for you.

I hope this “feedback” sort of interests you, at least coming from someone who considers herself a massive “fan” of your writing (I refresh this site like 3 times a day in hope of a new post even though I’m well aware of the roundup + 2 posts schedule).

It’s bit random, about the Twice “Is Yes or Yes rape friendly” article. I definitely agree with you on the term “rape culture” in the sense that it is a bit counter-intuitive and inflammatory (how could a culture that doesn’t explicitly promote rape be defined as a “rape culture”? I mean that’s a pretty dumb term if it doesn’t really serve the purpose of communicating what it’s supposed to communicate). Nevertheless, I think its probably reductionist to say “‘rape culture’ is a stupid term functionally and therefore the philosophy behind it must be useless’, like when ARMYs say that BTS oppars are totally in charge of their music, but then they’re probably not that in charge – that doesn’t really invalidate BTS, just their marketing strategy. I actually think some of the more nuanced “”””rape culture”””” arguments hold water precisely because they go beyond the ridiculous notion that “catcalling is on a moral equivalency to rape” and actually do address the fairly common counterargument you stated in roundup (a la ‘when someone steals we don’t call it “theft culture”’).

In that vein, I do kind of think that when you address some of the more prominent kpop fan screaming arguments (cultural appropriation, the male gaze, rape culture) you treat the concepts with as much nuance as the fangirls themselves. This is fine as a refutation of fangirl idiocy, but if I’m being honest fangirls have no idea what they’re talking about and almost function as a self-strawman. So it’s really easy to knock down something that pretty much knocks down itself in its black-and-white lack of critical thinking. In that way, you’re not wrong in what you write and it’s definitely very entertaining to read, but it also fails to address the more nuanced argument in a way that I find satisfying. Of course, you don’t write to satisfy me (and nor should you!) but you generally advertise that you appreciate feedback so here I am. I don’t even necessarily agree with a lot of the terms you have opposed, maybe all my time in school has made me obsessed with argumentation??

Also, as a side note, I play the piano and every time you pop up with a music theory post I cry!! I love that stuff!!!! You’ve said that with some music theory topics you can’t find a way to make it entertaining enough, but just know that some of your more nerdy readers would probably love it anyways.

The reason why I tackle the shit arguments is because they’re so shit.  I don’t call out the better, more nuanced arguments, precisely because they’re better, which means that I often agree a lot more with what’s being said anyway.  The moment that I actually see a more nuanced argument being applied to something in the k-pop sphere, then I’ll handle it on whatever level applies, but in k-pop it’s mainly just a bunch of screeching idiots, as you point out.

You’ll be happy to know that more music theory posts are on their way!

I have three cats

I like you.

I thought this would be one of those crazy surveys. I’m kinda of let down now.

Keep sexualizing idols! bye

The big surveys are roughly every March and September, with smaller ones in between.

While “I’m So Sick” is a refreshing change from Apink’s usual bullshit music, I must say I prefer seeing them in clingy white shirts and tennis skirts than whatever they’re doing now. Most devastatingly, I worry that they won’t qualify for a white coater comic this year. What will you do?

I hope that my most fappable post quelled your concerns.

Did you know Twitter copied your Loona as breadclips idea and turned it into similar threads?
Loona as electronical devices, Loona as umbrellas, Loona as Yves’ foundation, Loona as soap cutting videos, Loona as Minecraft blocks… there are no limits.

I blame exclusively you for this. Asshole.

Actually it was me who copied them.  Hence the point of the article.

At 45 years of age, it struck me recently that I’m too old for this …most of the kids coming through now could be my grandchildren. I might go back to early 80’s Manchester guitar bands & Prince or mid to late 80’s Cure. On vinyl, naturally. Will I be missing out if I leave kpop ? I do enjoy the mentalness of kpop stans, because
I know if I was 30 years younger, I would be right in the fucking thick of it, fighting the good delusional fight about why my ultimate bias isn’t gay, he just really really really likes skinship with muscly members of other groups & he’s obvs waiting for me, even though he doesn’t know it yet. Yep. Maybe I’ll hang on a bit then.

You’re never too old to be a caonima.

Your “interviews” with AustralianSana are great. I can’t believe I ended up enjoying them.

Cheers!  More on the way!

Kpopalypse is fine. I just read it bc brazilian actual sarcastic and realistic kpop site was deleted and no one know why
If you are wondering why so many brazilians started to appear here, probably for the same reason. Shot out to them

Hello to all readers from Brazil!  Kpopalypse stans Sepultura and the first three CSS albums!

The orange tabby cat is not a separate breed. It gets its name due to its appearance.
You will find many orange tabbies with black freckles on their noses.
The orange tabby coat comes in 4 types, classic (swirled), mackerel (striped), spotted, and ticked (agouti).
The classic tabby pattern gives the cat a tie-dyed look.
The mackerel pattern makes the cat look like a tiger.

Yeah they just call them “domestic shorthairs” and “domestic longhairs” where I live.  Would you believe that my cat was sold to me as a “shorthair”?

I’m starting to get a crush on this cute girl in my history class, she’s super nice and fun to be around; to be honest, sort of similar to a “snooty library bitch” like Eunha is. Unfortunately, since I’m just a naive high school student, it’s always a struggle to talk to her without getting nervous, acting weird, etc. A lot of my friends around my age (16-17) are also going through this same stage.

I’m well aware that high school “relationships” or whatever usually mean next to nothing long term but I can’t help but constantly have these thoughts in the back of my mind. My question to you is, how did you handle having these crushes throughout your adolescent years? Got any advice for an introverted, hormone-raging teen? Thanks.

I handled them like complete shit, and failed to get anything happening at all with anybody.  My advice is just talk to her.  Which probably isn’t very good advice, but I’m sorry I was a total failure with this in high school.  Further reading here.

I’ve had the phrase “virtue signaling” stuck in my head all day because something I read earlier triggered the thought. Now whenever I’ve been on social media all day, I keep seeing people virtue signaling all over the place and it’s incredibly annoying. Granted, I think it’s always annoying when people do it, but I’ve just been hyper aware of it today and it’s driving me nuts. On another note, Thanksgiving is tomorrow and my parents want to go to the local casino’s buffet instead of cooking anything, so i’m not looking forward to that. Happy weird Thanksgiving to me I guess.

Yeah it’s everywhere.  Everyone on the Internet is the nicest and most tolerant person ever, aren’t they.  And they’re so incredibly cunty and intolerant about being the nicest and most tolerant person ever, too.

I talked with Kpopalypse from a different timeline and he said he is a big fan of Loona and actively writes horror fanfiction with Yves and Chuu. Then again, he also said he’s from New Zealand so I don’t know if I can trust him.

Sounds suspicious.  I think someone is pretending to be me in an alternate universe.  I am not from New Zealand.

How do you know if people are lying to you with confidence? Any tips?
I know a person take advantage of people trust to take their money. One of the victim really considered suicide because her life savings is gone.

Liars are sloppy with details.  Ask very specific questions, and cross-reference them.

Rank is hereditary in hyenas
There’s a new variety of pink apples being developed since 1990 that should hit the EU market in five years
Pharell Williams hit on me and my friend in Cannes – politely took the L so props for him for being a gentleman also that same night I got 1600euros in cash from a random british lady for holding her luggage in the elevator
Kpopalypse is actually a very passionate music critic that uses foul language and cynicism to hide his adulation for this art

Who knows if these are true, someone should fact check (especially the last one).

It would be great if you can do more interviews. What fun! Funny ones! ?

And i know i bug you every year to monetize your blog, and i know you refuse every year, but here i am, bugging you again. If you do monetize, i hope you make beaucoup A$$$!!!

Thank you for a great blog?

I’d love to do more interviews, but getting people to talk to me is nearly impossible, because the way I do things (honest, all the facts) isn’t how k-pop does things (fairytale bullshit for morons).

I do not monetize via advertising, which I refuse to ever do, but there is the Kpopalypse Patreon that you can use if you wish.  I’m going to post the spreadsheet that I used to calculate this survey’s results onto my Patreon page, so check it out!  You don’t have to be a subscriber to see it.

Your Jonghyun jokes are hilarious. I don’t care what reddit says.

Thanks!

After 12 years I’m getting less and less interested in kpop.
As I said I’m in my 30s and I just check the most important new albums and MVs. I don’t keep up with new groups anymore, let alone with variety, shows and all that shit.
What I’m saying is I’m growing out of kpop.
How are you still interested in it?

I’m just interested in music generally.  If k-pop stops making decent music, I guess I’ll move onto something else, but there doesn’t seem to be any fear of that at present.

Concept which changed my life: eagle vs duck mentality (also known as player vs victim).

Victims know the route to innocence – they blame others, make comments like ‘someone should do x’ and when things go wrong they find a reason why which is not to do with their own culpability. ‘It’ s not my fault that the supplier didn’t deliver’. Essentially they just quack like a duck.

Players know the route to power and will make statements like ‘I will do x’. They have a proactive mindset and when things go wrong they will admit their culpability e.g. ‘I should have checked that the supplier could deliver on time.’ They empower themselves by not looking to pin the blame on others – they accept their responsibility. Like eagles they soar above all the ducks quacking and take action on what needs to be done.

^Maybe the above sounds a little dry but it’s amazing how this simple concept is easy to apply to your life/job and what a difference it makes. It also made my office a mess for a few weeks when someone ordered 50 squeaky rubber ducks and people kept squeezing them whenever someone started complaining. Recommended!

I agree with this general sentiment.

Asian Junkie still sucks monkey balls therefor I thank the bald old man for taking time out of his busy day and to write a blog that normal people can enjoy. That said I know he wouldn’t write if he didn’t enjoy it but that doesn’t mean I’m not grateful all the same CUNT.

Thanks!

keep up the good work, if there are people like me in their 30′,s who want το keep up with kpop in their busy schedule, you (and AJ) are the best places to visit

Thank you!  Actually AJ is mostly okay when he’s not deleting my comments by the truckload.

I have very limited time to plan my lesson as a teacher and be a good person but I’m doing this survey.
There is also a snowstorm outside and chances are that my bus will be extremely late, therefore making me late to the class I have to teach, but I’m still doing this survey.
I’m also tired and wish I could sleep more but I’m doing this survey instead.
Keep doing you, your posts cheer me up! (and make me procrastinate)

Thanks!

I enjoy watching your streams when I can, I wish you streamed more! Since that’s feedback and you don’t want that then cao ni ma see you next year

The streams aren’t very popular so I probably won’t increase the frequency of them unless I have a really good reason.  However they are niche content which a small minority of readers really do enjoy so I’ll probably keep doing them.  Streamers actually got to see me answer these feedback questions in advance!

Last year I told you not to get involved with political or sjw crap even though people on ask.fm are always trying to rope you into it. And you haven’t, so good on ya mate. That’s my feedback.

Cheers… and happy Chuu Day!

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That’s all for this post!  Please enjoy my cat’s new foray into k-pop, Kpopalypse will return!