It’s time for Kpopalypse roundup! Let’s check out some new releases!
I’m not exactly sure what’s going on here but EXID’s careful outfit colour-matching with their backdrop probably deserves an accolade of some description.
Wanna One – Spring Breeze
Another TV show group gets disbanded before they even get to do a decent song.
NCT 127 – Simon Says
My aunt I think had a “Simon Says” electronic game or something when I was a kid, but I can’t even remember what it did or how it worked, but it probably worked better than this song.
Highlight – Loved
I see the shit music police pulled up in their SUV and are taking Highlight away for good.
EXID – I Love You
EXID finally perfect the formula they’ve been milking with varying degrees of success since “Up & Down” and it’s probably their best song ever. Not sure why half the bass drops out during the (great) chorus though but I guess there had to be something wrong with it just to keep up tradition.
Voisper – Goodbye To Goodbye
A unusually good song from a group that is pretty much always crap, so I’m not sure what happened here.
Nature – You’ll Be Mine
The chorus and the verse sound like they’re from two completely different songs. Then that R&B breakdown comes in and it sounds like it belongs to a third completely different song! Sometimes difference is good but in this case it just sounds like someone went lucky-dipping for backing tracks.
Jaurim – 있지
I have to use the Korean title as I’m not even sure if this phrase has a direct English equivalent, because it seems to have about 57 meanings depending on context in a sentence (much like “cunt” in Australian). Anyway, song’s good, cunt.
BONUS SONGS
Kasper – 3 Months
Remember when Kasper was a rapper? Not sure what she is now but this isn’t very exciting.
Matilda – Between Fall And Winter
This is what happens when you really just can’t wait for the season to tick over to do a crappy seasonal comeback.
Sam Kim ft. Zico – It’s You
Meh.
Celeb Five ft. Duck Hwa Lee – Shutter
It’s like “Marry Man” with 50% of the humour and about 20% of the songwriting.
Elkie – I Dream
I dream of a day without shit ballads from CLC members.
Baek A Yeon – Sorry To Myself
I’m sorry too.
Woo Won Jae – A Fence
I imagine a power point isn’t very nearby in that desert, I was really hoping his laptop would run out of charge and the song would stop.
Hwang Chi Yeul – Learn To Love
I don’t think I could learn to love this.
BM – Better Myself
It’s weird seeing BM without his abs showing. How is Asian Junkie supposed to even fap to this.
Wine Loop – Pierrot
I think I need a few dozen wine loops before I can listen to this.
Lutto – Ugly
The crappy humour in the video is the best thing about this.
Martin Smith – Photographer
Ugh.
Killagramz – Lies
Can this guy stop being so shit one day, that’d be great. If even Voisper can finally do it, he can.
O.O.O – Playground
It says it’s a teaser but I’ve thrown it up here anyway as it may actually be a full song. It isn’t that great but at least it rocks which is nice.
Ten To Ten – Smoke Dance Bar
This could have been fantastic but basing the song’s verse harmony on I-I-IV-I was a huge mistake. Literally anything else would have sounded better.
Ash Island ft. Changmo – Deadstar
This is not good, the beat tries but it’s all undone by that mullet-head.
BONUS RANDOM VIDEO OF THE WEEK
Jennie being lazy (NOW vs THEN)
Imagine telling off a k-pop idol for being lazy, but being too lazy to use your own voice in a YouTube video. Fans are always big on “let them rest!!!!!1!1!” but you know that’s just fake concern because look how quick they are to shit on someone who obviously isn’t well-rested. Of course they can’t tell Jennie to rest now because they’ve been begging for YG to let her do something other than watch Netflix for an entire year, so now they have to make the choice between looking like hypocrites or looking like assholes.
That’s all for this week’s roundup – more next week!
KPOPALYPSE 
-My theory is that Shinsadong Tiger and LE have been saving “I love you” for the when Solji could return because it really is everything that was ever good about EXID post Up and Down.
– I also really can’t deal with that Jennie video comparing comeback stages and one off performances to what she looks like in the middle of a full BP concert. It’s crazy how people follow idols so intensely that she can’t flub a couple moves she’s been performing for years now without basically being accused of no longer giving af about her entire career.
the jennie situation is just an opportunity for kpop fans to circle jerk and bring their favorite idols up and jennie down. someone legit responded to me with “well [some bts guy idk] fainted and still performed!” so weird to see the hypocrisy of kpop fans so blatant. so they actually do not want their idols to rest, and most comments that say “let them rest” are done only to virtue signal…
im not surprised but its still annoying.
also, exid’s song is amazing. elkie’s… not so much… that’s all i have to say on the poor roll out of this week.
I agree on EXID’s song – it’s amazing. And the one good thing about Simon Says is that Johnny finally has some lines… not many, but more than before.
Good effort from EXID saves this week.
I think you missed an important High School Musical comeback: Ride Along by Kevin Woo. Not sure about that EXID song, I love the chorus but the verses kinda trigger me.
ILOVEYOULIKELALALALALALALALALA
Damn, I can’t get that out of my head.
PS – MV Bonus points for depicting EXID members with hangover (?)
When I saw that the person who posted the Jennie video had her as their profile pic I thought it will be a funny/meme-y video that should not be taken seriously, boy I was wrong. Poor girl, she must be so tired.
When i first saw EXID’s video, I felt awkward – I love these girls and want to like their videos, but this seems to show them at their worst, my lovely bias puking in a toilet? But after a few more times, I like the song better, it’s showing the intensity of heartbreak. And it’s probably edgy for Koreans, so…
Wait, Celeb 5 are now Celeb 4? With an even more extreme dance routine, on the edge of chaotic; I hope these older ladies can make it through ok… (No question of a 2x version, please!)
I completely disagree with you about Nature’s new song. Personally, I like it WAY better than EXID’s new song. I think those “I love you like lalalalalalalalala” parts are very annoying.
The Matilda comeback was such a letdown after almost a 2 year hiatus. I honestly expected Box Media to do something with the group after Semmi almost made it into The Uni+ final girl group. Instead we got this very milquetoast comeback after 2016’s You Bad! Don’t Make Me Cry. It’s such a bland song that is so forgettable.