There are many problems in the world today.  How can they be solved?  Kpopalypse has the solutions!  Read on for five k-pop related petitions that you can sign to change the world for the better right now!

There’s nothing like the power of k-pop to change lives and there’s nothing like the power of a good online petition on change.org to change the world.  Click on the images and links below to be redirected to change.org petitions created by Kpopalypse to solve all of today’s major global problems and start saving the world today!

 

Petition: Replace Elon Musk with LOONA’s Chuu as the product architect of Tesla

Elon Musk could potentially save the world on his own with his electric cars and power plants and stuff if he just stopped being so insane for maybe 0.5 seconds.  Like, what is he even talking about half the time.  However he does stan Loona so replacing him with Chuu seems like a good choice for his company and for the world.  Let’s put the pressure on his girlfriend to get him to step down and put Boram 2.0 in his place.

Sign the change.org petition here

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Petition: Send G-Dragon to sub-Saharan Africa to control birthrates

The world population looked like it was just about getting under control, until everyone in sub-Saharan Africa started creating 768 babies per family.  Since fucking probably isn’t going to go out of style all on its own, the African people could probably use a little help to cool off.  A YG-sponsored tour by BigBang’s G-Dragon should be just the ticket to creep out the African population to the extent where they find it difficult to think about having sex because they can’t get the sight of his funny new jaw in profile out of their heads.

Sign the change.org petition here

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Petition: Destabilise Islamic fundamentalism by distributing Mamamoo’s music to ISIS

The rise of Islamic extremism is a big challenge to today’s world.  There’s nothing wrong with believing in religion in general, but when people force their religious way of life onto others as “the only way” with acts of extreme violence and sadism perpetrated against those who disagree, it becomes clear that it’s time for some people to let their toxic religious beliefs go.  The fact that Mamamoo haven’t been able to produce any decent songs at all since “Piano Man” was released back in 1853 should provide ample evidence of the random cruelty and lack of grand design in the universe and make even the most hardcore jihadist rethink their belief in an omnipotent, benevolent higher power who cares about the destinies of humans.

Sign the change.org petition here

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Petition: Halt rising sea levels by making Waterbomb festival a weekly event for all k-pop idols

Everybody loves Waterbomb festival in Korea, where many k-pop idols dress in skimpy clothing and get squirted a lot, and the excess amounts of water stored for this event contributes to mitigating rising global sea levels.  However the positive environmental benefits are so far minimal as this event only happens once each summer.  By making this event run weekly and by featuring as many k-pop idols as possible, we can drain many more litres of water from the oceans and save low-lying coastal cities across the world from erosion, population displacement and property damage.

Sign the change.org petition here

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Petition: Support independent music by pressuring JYP to spend exactly $23.74 on UZA’s “Focus” album

It’s tough being an independent musician these days, and those with the boldness and determination levels to strike out on their own deserve all your support.  However it can be tough doing it in Korea without the influential backing of a big k-pop label, and right now with Twice at the top of their game there are few people more influential in the realm of k-pop than JYP.  By pressuring JYP to buy UZA’s “Focus” album from her official Bandcamp at a marked-up price, word may spread of this good deed and this may start a groundswell of financial support for UZA and other independent artists as others copy the cool hip new trend.  Let’s use k-pop’s hive-minded tendencies for good!

Sign the change.org petition here

Lead by example – buy UZA’s “Focus” for $23.74 here

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That’s all for Kpopalypse for this post!  Kpopalypse will return soon with a better world and more posts!