It’s the post that k-pop boobs-perverts around the world have been waiting for! Yes it’s time to dive once again into the joys of
objectification and superficial fetishism for your fapping pleasure important scientific research for the betterment of mankind with the fifth edition of Kpopalypse’s big boobs in k-pop guide!
Documenting large boobs in k-pop is a big undertaking and no list anywhere can ever claim to be truly complete. However I try my best to cover all bases (well, mainly second base) and bring you all the trufax about k-pop boobs in the world today. Note that this list will only cover girls not listed in previous episodes (with one exception, which we’ll get to shortly), so if your favourite hasn’t been listed here, you may wish to check the following posts to see if they were featured in a previous episode of this series:
If you still don’t find your favourite k-pop girl, she was probably left out to annoy you, or she just wasn’t busty enough to make the cut. Feel free to complain about this in the comments below or on your social media of choice.
The usual rating system will apply. Here’s a quick recap:
Size: the amount of raw TT on offer, before other factors come into play.
E factor: E is for enhancement – have boobs been pushed up, padded, taken from flattering angles, benefited from certain presentation in dance routines etc?
PS factor: PS is for plastic surgery, and also for Photoshop. Have boobs been enhanced using these technological methods?
Fanservice: is a bird in the bush worth two in the hand?
Fapability: a combination of all of the above, plus a dash of completely unfair and biased subjectivity that comes naturally with being a blog author.
Without further ado, let’s get started!
By extremely popular demand I’m taking another look at Twice’s Jihyo, who is the only person I’ll reassess for 2017. Nobody really mentioned anything about Jihyo after last year’s list, but then “Likey” dropped, and along with it came the patented Jihyo boob shake:
Now that more data exists on Twice, it’s fair to say that Jihyo is bustier than Momo and the other Twice girls. While her boobs do still look pretty pushed-up, enough material exists to confirm that Jihyo’s volume remains consistent over a wide variety of clothing choices.
On top of that she’s demonstrated fairly large amounts of jiggle, so whatever is there is definitely natural. So she can have some more points added before we move onto this year’s new entrants to the lists.
Kpopalypse bias Eunha looks busty sometimes but it’s mainly a camera illusion, just because she’s so petite in general so her boobs look bigger because of that alone. Sometimes you get photos like this:
However she’s really arching herself in this pose, plus the movement and the bra all adds to the apparent volume. She’s not really all that busty, as more revealing angles will show:
I can see why people were fooled however. Girls who rock a very “library girl” vibe like Eunha does (and I’m a big fan of both library looks and Eunha in general) always look a bit buster than they really are, because of their predisposition toward extremely high necklines and lots of layers with horizontal and vertical lines. There’s also a psychological aspect to it, the false logic perpetrated by computer games where the harder-to-open container tends to store the goods of greater quantity. Nevertheless the reality is that Eunha just isn’t that busty.
Joy (Red Velvet)
Joy is another person whose clothing choices often add a lot to her apparent bustiness. Below you can see her in horizontal stripes, a proven volume enhancer:
While Joy is not really all that well-endowed, her clothing choices (especially in SM’s videos) plus the fact that she’s standing next to some positively anorexic-looking groupmates half the time all help to give the impression of her as curvier than she really is.
Still, Kpopalypse is all about giving points for effort. After all girls can’t change the hand that nature gave them. Well, actually they can, but it’s risky and expensive plus the results can be a dice-roll. Not that Kpopalypse doesn’t appreciate boobs of all types, but I’d never advocate that someone go under the knife for my own pleasure unlike human garbage such as Allkpop’s Johnny Noh.
Very few women scream out “not my type” as much as Junghwa from EXID, however people did point out to me that there might be some boobage worth investigating, so I made sure to take a closer look for the benefit of readers.
On investigation I think it’s true that Junghwa doesn’t have as much boobs as hyped. Most of her modelling shots are pretty heavily Photoshopped around the cleavage area, and other shots usually involve thick bras and layers.
However the volume is natural – Junghwa’s wide shoulder span is a giveaway that there’s no surgical enhancement here. Remember that shoulder width and (potential) natural boob size are often correlated.
In some of the promotional pictures Loona’s Choerry looks very busty, however Choerry has also provided one of the best examples I can think of which demonstrates enhanced bustiness through clothing alone. Observe the below image:
Choerry is looking great in this photo and the shade around the chest area contributes to an impression of boobs, however here she is again from the same shoot with a slightly different sitting angle, lighter makeup and the Photoshop removed:
I had to do a double-take to make sure that was actually her and not one of her groupmates, but it is definitely her. The k-pop machine is very good at manufacturing bustiness out of very little, and this is where boobs research comes in handy so you can determine the trufax. Hopefully these posts also help less busty girls who would like techniques to compete in the all-important boobs arms race.
This IS Jennie, right? I’m still struggling with telling apart the Blackpink members to some degree. I know who Lisa is but rest of them…
Well anyway, whoever she is, she’s pretty fuckin’ attractive. It’s easy to see why YG dumped 2NE1 like a hot potato as soon as Blackpink debuted, after all YG has never been a man about morality, loyalty, looking after his artist roster or anything like that. He probably couldn’t wait to get these girls up there.
There’s not much boob here though, really. Sometimes she’ll wear a tight thing like this but there’s a bra under it and once you remove that there isn’t a lot of room left for the actual tits, but she still gets credit because she’s got presentation down well enough to fool a lot of you. She’s still the bustiest by far in Blackpink too, don’t even get me started on the others, none of whom will appear here.
Seungyeon looks pretty busty in a white T-shirt with stuff written on it, but then so does everybody. I think she wound up being suggested a lot because of this wardrobe malfunction:
The footage is actually quite revealing (pun intended) because this is probably what most k-pop girls wear under their clothing in situations where they’re not aiming for any actual underwear exposure – industrial strength skin-coloured bras that pack quite a lot of bulk, and can keep things in place during those fast dance routines.
More proof that most k-pop girls in general are not busty and Seungyeon is no exception. She can’t even look curvy in a white button-up shirt.
Shannon Williams is far too erudite and woke for this cheap post of mine. She doesn’t want any part of k-pop’s shady objectification schemes, god knows she has enough struggles with MBK at the moment fucking her around and not letting her do shows or fansignings and treating her like absolute crap in general, so Kpopalypse is going to do her a favour and is not going to feature her here. Also the poor girl had to deal with assholes telling her to get her tits out on her livestream that one time and she shouldn’t have to deal with that kind of harassment bullshit, so I don’t want to encourage anyone reading this to be dicks to her. I’m sure you wouldn’t anyway as all my readers are lovely and are able to read between the lines and completely understand the true objective of this post, but just in case some creep from any of the objectively inferior websites who criticise Shannon stumbles across this blog – you never know. Here’s a nice picture of Shannon holding a bunny plushie so you can think of bunnies and nice things and forget all about any rude or naughty thoughts that are inappropriate and objectifying
even though Shannon has some of the best boobs in the entire history of k-pop goddamn have you seen them, like seriously. Moving right along.
Seriously, FUCK those of you who suggested Grace for this list. Not that I have anything against Grace in fact she seems like a pretty cool girl from all accounts, but when I see her name I just start thinking about that shit group CSJH The Grace that SM used to have and how they were a cancer on k-pop and this just ruins my day.
I’m not sure whose idea it was to pose Grace here like she’s been throwing up in the toilet but that’s exactly what I want to do when I hear anything by or about CSJH The Grace. God they were shit. This Grace here has nothing to do with them let’s make that clear. Also she should change her name so she doesn’t cop all the negativity by association.
Actually scratch that – no she shouldn’t. Why should Grace have to change her name, that’s not right. SM should change the name of CSJH The Grace instead, to “The Most Dogshit K-pop Group That Ever Existed” or something like that (they could abbreviate it to TMDKPGTEE seeing as how they like acronyms so much). The onus should be on SM after all they’re the ones who funded and brought into being all that nonsense shit cancer music whereas Grace here is perfectly innocent. Sorry what was this post about again.
“Who?” you may well ask, as I did, until I remembered that Gilgun has actually been in k-pop from way back. She’s 38 years old at the time of writing, looks great and has a serious body that is unlike most k-pop idols because she obviously eats properly and works out.
I think in this photo Gilgun is in some kind of modelling contest for girls who are buff as fuck. I couldn’t find any information about it, but no doubt she did well. Gilgun should have probably been in these lists a long time before now, but she’s been plagued with contract troubles and weird nonsense which has sort of kept her a bit off my radar. I’m so sorry Gilgun, please don’t hurt me thank you.
Anyway, when someone is looking this fighting fit, the boobs are usually real and what you see is what you get. Bodybuilding girls usually don’t want to fuck around with saline bags stitched into their chest because it fucks with the muscle contours, and strong torso muscles will support and enhance any boobage anyway.
Even after following them for seven years, I’m still struggling with identifying Apink members individually. Once of the girls has got a really cute “just been punched in the face” look and I can never remember if it’s Chorong or Bomi. (I know what you’re thinking – no, it’s not Naeun.)
The thing is that both Bomi and Chorong have that look from time to time, or at least I think they both do. Maybe it’s just been Bomi all along. I don’t even know, really.
Any of these pictures could be either of them. Anyway, Chorbomi or whatever has some nice boobs and while they’re not as out there as Hayoung, I think they should still be acknowledged.
I probably should have put Jiyoung in this list back when she was actually doing stuff in Kara, but better late than never, right?
Actually I don’t even know. Jiyoung was always one of the ones that I never really gave a crap about and had trouble telling apart from some of the other members at various times.
She’s got nice boobs, I guess…? Kara were such a nowhere group, girls-wise. They had that one cross-eyed girl who was hot and apart from that I can’t even remember much about them apart from the fact that their songs were on average a lot better than their photoshoots.
People have been accusing me of ignoring the ex T-ara rapper due to bias, and they’re right – I’m guilty as charged. I never liked her from 2012 when it was blatantly obvious to me that she was at fault for the entire T-ara situation. However now that T-ara have emerged victorious over the fake rumours, in this post I’ve finally decided to put all the Hwayoung drama to bed and move on. Let’s redress the balance and give her the feature in the boobs series that she deserves.
I don’t think my readers who were asking for her understood what I meant by curves though, I was just talking about boobs, I didn’t mean the entire body curving.
I know she’s barely relevant to k-pop anymore anyway but there really isn’t any boob here to be seen whatsoever… and these are naked pictures too, so it doesn’t come any clearer than this. People saying that she’s busty really need to get a clue. She does have a bit of a fat rear end in this picture though, I wonder why she isn’t doing better in the ass surveys.
Thanks for reading – Kpopalypse will return with more posts soon!