Kpopalypse Nugu Alert is back! It’s time for another round of nugu action!
There was a time when Kpopalypse blog wasn’t very popular and I received very little correspondence from caonimas. That time was 2012 and 2013. As Kpopalypse blog has gradually increased in popularity since then, everything surrounding it has also ramped up enormously and it’s now gotten to the point where I get so many different types of correspondence from so many different places that it’s simply impossible to engage with everything that you folks send to me. As a one-caonima show who is doing this all ad-free on a volunteer basis and who also works multiple jobs and is in a long-term relationship, I only have so much time and resources to throw at content, and many posts are incredibly time-consuming. Even something that would seem simple, such as counting up votes for surveys, is actually a very long and tricky task when there are hundreds of people doing them, all answering multiple questions in a slightly different way. Of course, I also have T-ara levels of determination to continue bringing you content, so fear not as Kpopalyspe blog will continue unabated, but just understand that I’m not ignoring your enquiries. I do read each and every thing that people send to me, if I don’t reply or take some form of action around it that usually just means that the many other demands of life might be getting in the way (or it might mean that what you wrote was total shit, but most caonimas are bright folks so it’s probably not that. Probably.)
In the spirit of giving a little bit extra back to not just the Korean nugus in need but also you lovely readers, this edition of Kpopalypse Nugu Alert is a reader request special. There’s no unifying theme with the following artists other than that you all requested them a fuckton lately and I just haven’t been able to respond or get to any of this stuff until now. The usual Nugu Alert rules apply, as always:
- Less than 20,000 views on official channels
- Not notably successful outside Korea (and probably not inside Korea either, but who the fuck knows)
- Of interest to Kpopalypse
Let’s get it started!
Lily – Oppa You’re Mine
Who the fuck is Lily? I have no idea, but it seems that a lot of people in Korea are much more in the know about this than me, because at the time of writing she has 117889 Facebook followers and 22700 Instagram followers, and I’m pretty sure she didn’t buy them all. It makes me wonder why she’s not linking this new song of hers on her social media accounts, as it seems odd that only a few percent of these people are bothering to check out her song. Lily is squarely aiming for Hong Jin Young style trot territory, which was probably what got this video on the radar of all the caonimas who suggested it for Nugu Alert. Hong Jin Young fans may appreciate more than Lily’s music, as Lily’s ample upper-body proportions are also strikingly similar, however I also get the feeling that Lily is quite short so the true level of bustiness here is difficult to ascertain, and certainly something which I will be sure to research in the future. Feel free to send relevant material, but don’t get too excited with dreams of falling into her pillowy bosom – the man in the video appears to be fellow nugu Racoon Park, her labelmate and real life partner. No wonder he looks so happy in his videos all the time.
YouTube views at time of writing: 3579
Notable attribute: low resolution reduces the impact of emotionally climactic scenes such as from 1:32 to 1:34, caonimas please feel free to provide higher resolution versions of these important moments
Nugu Alert rating: high
Penny – Bang Bang Bang
Penny on the other hand doesn’t seem to be very popular anywhere. I couldn’t find any information on this person whatsoever, and the only online profile I could find for her seems to have been removed. Oddly enough, that profile sports the CJE&M logo, so I’m not sure what such a rich company was doing with such a cheap production, I guess they were just acting as the distributors here rather than the creators. Maybe it’s the song that’s to blame for Penny’s lack of success, which is some cheap and forgettable electropop with a horribly washed out mix in dire need of some aural excitation. It’s certainly not Penny herself, and she in fact looks great despite the incredible cheapness of the visuals, due to some smart dressing plus the deer-in-headlights highly-exposed film hiding any unwelcome skin contours which is a common lighting trick used on age-conscious female idols over 35, east and west. In particular, the bargain-basement-store police uniform is a real winner, and I sincerely appreciate Penny’s dress-up which I’m sure I’ll find useful for future Nugu Alert header images.
YouTube views at time of writing: 1003
Notable attribute: lady trying and failing to keep a straight face at 1:22
Nugu Alert rating: extreme
2wentys – I Heard It
People often ask me to write Nugu Alerts about songs which have no official video, after all if there’s any nugus that need a leg up more than others its certainly the ones who don’t even have the cash to splash on a visit to the costume shop and a green-screen. I don’t mind doing this, but the problem is that without some visuals of some kind often there’s not a lot to write about because it’s difficult to discuss music alone in much detail to an audience that isn’t going to understand a great deal of the terminology that I would use. That’s why my reviews tend to focus on entertainment and laughs rather than breaking down every note bit by bit – technical reviews are just alienating, even to someone who is technically conversant, even I despise reading them when others do them. So with all this in mind, I’ve included two YouTubes here, one with the actual official audio of the song on it, and the other showing a dance practice (but with crummy speaker-in-corner audio) just so you can get a feel for the visuals on offer, that way if you’re feeling like some fancy YouTube clickwork you can play them both but mute the audio of the dance practice one. The song itself isn’t bad and the chorus even has some faint ABBA vibes (always a hit with Australians) and there’s nothing not to like about the usual faux-schoolgirl look, but k-pop is a visual medium as much as it is an auditory one so I feel like they’re selling themselves a bit short only allowing us to experience one and not the other simultaneously. If the people behind this have no cash left and want a hot tip, maybe try throwing the official audio over the dance practice footage? Thank me later, team.
YouTube views at time of writing: 1254
Notable attribute: 2wenty’s cheap bedsheet dance room logo actually looks slightly more ironed-out than Blackpink’s
Nugu Alert rating: extreme
That’s all for this episode of Kpopalypse Nugu Alert! Kpopalypse will return in the future with more nugus!