Kpopalypse roundup – new k-pop releases 5/12/2016

It’s time for Kpopalypse roundup!  Let’s take a look at this week’s new releases!

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K-Much

Hyoyeon – Mystery

Just sounds like generic unexciting “girl group member gone solo” stuff from about 15 years ago, but I will admit it was good to see Hyoyeon do a solo debut just to see everyone freak out about it.

Seventeen – Boom Boom

The “dog taking a piss” dance move is really cool.

Cosmic Girl – Don’t You Worry About Me

This is NOT Cosmic Girls (WJSN).  It’s also not any good.

An Ye Eun – Somehow

Someone commented that the strings sound like “Bittersweet Symphony” but unfortunately that’s drawing a long violin bow.

Shinhwa – Orange

Look at Shinhwa pretending that they’re having oh-so-much-fun recording in the studio for the 40 gazillionth time in their careers.  When you’re 20 you can get away with looking like everything in the world is fascinating because at that age things are genuinely still new, but at Shinhwa’s age you just look like you’re on the special needs spectrum.

AOA – Wow War Tonight

Just your average Japanese k-pop song about crappy sport or whatever bullshit and then HOLY FUCK IT GOES FUCKING EARLY ATARI TEENAGE RIOT FOR THE JIMIN PART FUK YEH JUST LOOP THOSE 20 SECONDS CUNT

BONUS SONGS

Heize – Star

The moon has no atmosphere so sound can’t travel, so I really like this video concept of making Korea’s shitty ballad singers record their songs there.

B1A4 – A Lie

Not Christmas-ish enough to warrant a separate review in the Christmas list, not interesting enough for me to review properly here either.

SHINee – Winter Wonderland

Another crappy “winter song” that falls just shy of Christmas qualification.

Halo – Mariya

This song is actually three months old and I missed it when it came out, so I thought I’d put it here now.  I wouldn’t read anything into that if I were you, I’m just a slackass.

5tion – My Valentine

Yeah it’s alright, I don’t hate it and can’t even think of anything snarky to say about it.  All my haters be happy for once.  Moving on.

H.Y.U.K – Achieve

Another boring rock song that shows how Korea is so far behind in this shit.

Chancellor ft. Lyn – Surrender

I was so glad that there were enough last-minute new releases and requests for the show this week that I didn’t have to resort to playing this boring R&B crap.

pH-1 – Perfect

They seem like nice guys and that’s exactly why they shouldn’t doing this – hip-hop isn’t supposed to be happy and joyful, come back and make some more music after you’ve shared needles with some crackwhores and borrowed money from a few people and not given it back.

Double K ft. Seo In Guk, Dok2 – OMG

Not as bad as I thought, but then that doesn’t say much as I thought it would be pretty bad.

Sechs Kies – Couple

This fucking dick is way too soft to be going into any pussy anytime soon.

Chaeyoung – Melody Project

Nope.

Monsta X – White Love

Another “not-Christmas” song, I’ve heard that Monsta X’s “white love” is popular with the ladies.

Zia – Have A Drink Today

Yeah I might, actually.  Fuck it, give me twenty, I think I need all the drinks after this song.


This roundup accompanied the last “general” Kpopalypse radio show for 2016 and therefore this may or may not be the last Kpopalypse roundup for 2016, depending on how “fully Christmas” the new releases start becoming.  However Kpopalypse postings will continue, including lots of different posts to wrap up the year in k-pop!  There will also soon be a quiz where you can guess the Kpopalypse lists!

Schedule for the next few radio shows is as follows:

Dec 12 – Guest programmer: Bianca Vo – HQ Complex

Dec 19 – Honourable mentions for 2016

Dec 26 – Kpopalypse favourite songs of 2016 30-16

Jan 2 – Kpopalypse favourite songs of 2016 15-1

Thanks to all those of you who have been reading roundup in 2016, I appreciate it!  Whether you like to see what I write about the songs, or even if you hate or disregard my writing but just like to know what is out each week, I definitely appreciate you coming, so thanks to all of you!

3 thoughts on “Kpopalypse roundup – new k-pop releases 5/12/2016

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