Kpopalypse roundup – new k-pop releases 2/5/2016

It’s time for another Kpopalypse roundup!  Let’s take a look at this week’s new releases!

vividiva575

Vividiva

BTS – Fire

At least uptempo boy-band-by-numbers is better than downtempo boy-band-by-numbers.  Here at Kpopalypse HQ we have to be grateful for small mercies.

CocoSori – Exquisite!

CocoSori continue on their path as Orange Caramel 2.0 with twice the forced-viral gimmicky bullshit and half the songwriting/production skill.  Oh well, at least it’s fast, so it’s over quickly.

Apink – The Wave

I love the bit where the Apink girls sing over the white text backdrop that lists all their much better songs that you’ll wish you were listening to instead.

Gfriend – Wave

I love it how there’s a shred guitar solo in every Gfriend song.  Seems like the girls share their dorm with the most frustrated metal guitarist ever.

April – Tinker Bell

April are back, complete with short skirts, labia-tone lipstick, and easily their best song yet.  Just don’t tell Chris Hansen.

Park Boram – Dynamic Love

Of course she has to have “Park” in there to differentiate herself from the One True Boram.

OTOT – OO

Don’t ask, I have no idea either.  But this is cool so FUCK you.

Inlayer – Mindjack

I guess SM Station ran out of shit ballads so they wheeled in this Animals As Leaders style prog-metal group.  For once I actually want to hear what something sounds like with Taeyeon’s voice over the top.

XL Squad – We The Future

They may look like high-schoolers squinting in the sunlight after stepping out of an 18-hour Starcraft 2 marathon, but the beats are great.  Shit is real in Korea’s gaming cafes.

Vidan – Wishes Of The Rings

This ballad is pretty good and probably deserves its own post to help explain why and how Korea gets this type of thing oh-so-very-wrong 99% of the time.

BONUS SONGS

Lamb C – Home (Closer)

They think pairing this shit Rhodes ballad with driving footage will “relax” us but we all remember Ladies Code and now I just want to listen to Slayer and chug heaps of caffeine.

Babylon ft. Dok2 -Between Us

Fender Rhodes AND Dok2.  Mathematically, it could only be worse if it also had a dubstep harmonica section.

Lou.de – Disrespectful Breakup

With the still picture of guitars in a grimy run-down room plus that group name I half-expected some actual loud rock music here.  Silly me.

Hyuna & Hyemi (Nine Muses) – Confession

Well, this is boring.  Next.

No Brain – Living Paycheck To Paycheck

No Brain always sound a bit watered down to me, like a very polite Rancid, and politeness has no place in music like this.

Megan Lee – Stronger

America already has Katy Perry so this is a waste of time musically, but watching Megan caterwaul about how Kim Tae Woo is probably a fuckwit is kinda cool.  Fuck g.o.d, fuck them in the ass.

Yesung – Here I Am

Ugh.

J-Block – Like A Shower

A shower of what, is the question.

Mighty Mouth ft. Soya – Nice 2 Meet U

Any rap song with “Nice 2 Meet U” as the title is obviously going to be shit. Go hard or go home, kids.

Tao – The Road

Tao knows all about going hard, having experienced the hard life in SM, represented in this video as a gang of faceless corporate thugs.  10/10 for accuracy.

11 thoughts on “Kpopalypse roundup – new k-pop releases 2/5/2016

  1. I agree on putting a vocalist in the Inlayer song, but I disagree on Taeyeon being it.

    Her voice to me is the auditory equivalent of a flat soft drink; the flavours are all there, but there’s no substance. It’s like her vocals have no bass or something.

    All the others don’t have much of a memorable effect on me. This week’s songs suck. =(

    • I just picked a random name, I could have picked anyone. Every female k-pop vocalist ever has exactly the same vocal sound, they all get run through the same computer software.

  2. BTS Fire reminds me of ‘Turn Down For What’ a lot, which is unsurprising because the buildup is basically the same, except replace drums with electric noise.

    I like electro party bullshit so it works for me, but i’d agree its still fairly typical.

    On the other hand, thank god boring spring ballads seem to be on their way out.

  3. Would be really interested in reading that ballads article if you wrote it – I can never seem to guess what you’ll like and what you’ll loathe when it comes to ballads!

  4. I’ve noticed you tend to listen to instrumentals first when you judge a song. Those traditional instrumentals in VIDAN’s song must have have played a huge role in impressing you.

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