It’s time for another Kpopalypse roundup! Let’s take a look at this week’s new releases!
BTS – Fire
At least uptempo boy-band-by-numbers is better than downtempo boy-band-by-numbers. Here at Kpopalypse HQ we have to be grateful for small mercies.
CocoSori – Exquisite!
CocoSori continue on their path as Orange Caramel 2.0 with twice the forced-viral gimmicky bullshit and half the songwriting/production skill. Oh well, at least it’s fast, so it’s over quickly.
Apink – The Wave
I love the bit where the Apink girls sing over the white text backdrop that lists all their much better songs that you’ll wish you were listening to instead.
Gfriend – Wave
I love it how there’s a shred guitar solo in every Gfriend song. Seems like the girls share their dorm with the most frustrated metal guitarist ever.
April – Tinker Bell
April are back, complete with short skirts, labia-tone lipstick, and easily their best song yet. Just don’t tell Chris Hansen.
Park Boram – Dynamic Love
Of course she has to have “Park” in there to differentiate herself from the One True Boram.
OTOT – OO
Don’t ask, I have no idea either. But this is cool so FUCK you.
Inlayer – Mindjack
I guess SM Station ran out of shit ballads so they wheeled in this Animals As Leaders style prog-metal group. For once I actually want to hear what something sounds like with Taeyeon’s voice over the top.
XL Squad – We The Future
They may look like high-schoolers squinting in the sunlight after stepping out of an 18-hour Starcraft 2 marathon, but the beats are great. Shit is real in Korea’s gaming cafes.
Vidan – Wishes Of The Rings
This ballad is pretty good and probably deserves its own post to help explain why and how Korea gets this type of thing oh-so-very-wrong 99% of the time.
Lamb C – Home (Closer)
They think pairing this shit Rhodes ballad with driving footage will “relax” us but we all remember Ladies Code and now I just want to listen to Slayer and chug heaps of caffeine.
Babylon ft. Dok2 -Between Us
Fender Rhodes AND Dok2. Mathematically, it could only be worse if it also had a dubstep harmonica section.
Lou.de – Disrespectful Breakup
With the still picture of guitars in a grimy run-down room plus that group name I half-expected some actual loud rock music here. Silly me.
Hyuna & Hyemi (Nine Muses) – Confession
Well, this is boring. Next.
No Brain – Living Paycheck To Paycheck
No Brain always sound a bit watered down to me, like a very polite Rancid, and politeness has no place in music like this.
Megan Lee – Stronger
America already has Katy Perry so this is a waste of time musically, but watching Megan caterwaul about how Kim Tae Woo is probably a fuckwit is kinda cool. Fuck g.o.d, fuck them in the ass.
Yesung – Here I Am
J-Block – Like A Shower
A shower of what, is the question.
Mighty Mouth ft. Soya – Nice 2 Meet U
Any rap song with “Nice 2 Meet U” as the title is obviously going to be shit. Go hard or go home, kids.
Tao – The Road
Tao knows all about going hard, having experienced the hard life in SM, represented in this video as a gang of faceless corporate thugs. 10/10 for accuracy.