This post contains the results of the Kpopalypse 2015 survey of important trufax!
Read on for all the exciting numbers, charts, opinions and statistics that you crave!
Thanks to everybody who did the Kpopalypse 2015 survey of important trufax! The survey generated nearly 900 responses, which is huge and amazing, plus a great sample size from which to find out stuff about things. All the questions and answers to the survey are as follows:
Hi. How are you? Answer in as much or as little detail as applicable.
Most people were good. Some of you weren’t so good but hopefully the survey was a relative high point in your not-so-good existence. A lot of you were studying, writing essays or about to take exams and complained that my survey was getting in the way of that. Believe it or not, I’m not a student therefore I’m fairly oblivious to your study schedule (and I might teach music but I don’t give my students lame exams and tests because I don’t suck acres of throbbing dick like your teachers at school and university). As usual quite a few people wondered if I really cared – of course I care! I’m great, by the way, for those who asked.
How do you feel about doing another Kpopalypse survey?
Most people were more or less okay about doing the survey, which figures because the people who weren’t okay with it probably wouldn’t have filled it out. This question also keeps track of how many haters I have, which is a useful statistic because I like to be able to quantify the amount of annoyance that I’m causing others at any given moment.
This is a picture of Eunjung.
This was the first Kpopalypse survey built with Google Forms which means I could include images for the first time. People often complained in previous surveys how the format was ugly and there was no fap material, so I finally listened to your whining and did something about it. Yes, I also realise that I could have used “publish analytics” on Google Forms to auto-generate a summary for you to look at, but that would be boring, unfunny and not very characteristic of Kpopalypse’s high determination levels.
The above picture of Eunjung was included as an intro to the next Google Forms-related question.
Because I am using Google Forms, I can now put images in my surveys. How do you feel about this development?
Prettier surveys seems to be what most people want. Rest assured that I am quite happy with Google Forms and will continue to use it as a survey platform, however I cannot guarantee the absence of GIFs of Suhyun from AKMU in future surveys.
Kpopalypse fanfictions tend to follow a strict formula: someone gets involved in the world of k-pop somehow, then inevitably bad shit happens to them. Given this information, what do you think is the underlying message of all Kpopalypse fanfiction?
Some people have noticed that my fanfictions are all quite similar and predictable – and deliberately so! Opinions on why this is the case were fairly evenly divided but skewed slightly in the “I like to watch dopey k-pop fans fall down stairs” direction.
This is a video of Red Velvet.
Thoughts on the above video?
This question was asked because I get asked my “thoughts?” on k-pop videos constantly so I thought it would be fun to turn the tables for a change. Also I was interested to find out how helpful my Red Velvet Identification Test post might have been. As it turns out, not very. Oh well.
On a scale of 1 to 10, how likely are you to fap to k-pop videos?
This may seem like a bunch of no-fappers (or liars), but if we take 1 as “definitely will not fap” and any other number as “may fap if certain unspecified conditions are met”, we can see that about 60% of readers have fapped to k-pop videos or are likely to fap to k-pop videos in the future.
Input your guess for the date of the next comeback by CSJH The Grace. Closest guess wins a mystery prize when the song comes out. If you don’t believe that their comeback will ever come out, you can skip this question.
Once I excluded all the people who sensibly ignored this question completely, plus all the trollkins who put dates in the distant past before the musical crimes of CSJH commenced, or some far-flung future time when CSJH will be rightfully forgotten, I had about three valid responses left. Good luck in the draw, folks! I know I didn’t ask for any names and addresses, but don’t worry – Australia’s new metadata retention laws will help me find out where you live so I can send you your prize.
Where do you enjoy reading Kpopalypse posts the most?
Note that the question is about where you enjoy reading them the most, not which site you click on the most. Sorry about the small yucky text in the answers here but since so many of you actually have been willingly submitting your eyes to the unreadable dross that is my own web design, I figure a bit of small text here in this post is something that you can handle.
The following video is a fancam of Soyoon from Pocket Girls.
Watch the above fancam specifically from 1:15. Which model do you prefer?
Competition was close but eventually the blue SUV pulled ahead, proving nothing in particular. Gosh, no idea why this question is even here, I don’t even care about cars.
Select your favourite episode of Kpopalypse Nugu Alert (“Extreme Edition” omitted for fairness purposes):
The combination of Unpretty Rapstar’s Kisum, Kpopalypse favourite list nugus 912 Crew and idol fitness trainers Rok Kiss was a three-way nugu attack that proved unbeatable, easily snatching up nearly 40% of the vote on their own. Of course, this question was really just a way to force people to choose between nugus, and quite a few of you bitched in your answer to the next question about being made to select any option at all, to which I say – in Kpopalypse surveys, Kpopalypse makes the rules, not you.
COMPLAINT CORNER! Use this text box to whine about something relating to Kpopalypse blog that displeases you. Hopefully if you get it out of your system here you won’t need to fill up my ask.fm, Twitter feed or blog comments with similar whining and bore everybody to tears. If on the other hand you’re not in a whiny mood you can skip this question, or use this space for something creative and/or actually interesting.
Lots of people had a lot to say. Here are some comments you had, and my replies.
Are you secretly a banana trying to take over the world? – I can’t tell you, it’s a secret.
I think you feel like you have to restrain yourself from doing technical posts because people won’t understand them; I have little to no musical knowledge, but I’ve found every single technical post you’ve done so far (yes, stretching back into 2012 or so) interesting and edifying. – Thanks! It’s really hard to find the right balance between “enough technical shit to make things educational” and “wow this is boring as fucking fuck, nobody cares” which is why technical posts don’t happen as often as I’d like them to happen.
Your fanfic was shit! – Sucked in for reading it and wasting your life.
Write more fanfiction, Kpopalypse. I’ll love you forever. – Deal.
You don’t post often enough – I know. I’m very busy, all the time. My posts also take a LONG time to do.
I read a few fanfics you wrote and it appears that you are always angry when you write them. Why are you so angry dude? – This is a really weird perception that I hear often and I don’t know why people think it or where it comes from. Kpopalypse is never angry about anything, and is usually laughing his ass off as his own shitty jokes while writing this crap. Maybe it’s something about my sense of humour that is lost in translation and comes out as anger to people who are culturally not on the same page?
Should you really be complaining about Suhyun’s looks if you don’t show your own face? – I have shown my face on all of my livestreams, and anyone who goes to my Facebook page can see it too. Also suggesting that I “complain” about Suhyun’s looks is a pretty massive misreading of why I use her image…
I think you stopped using the same jokes you used all the time in 2014, which got pretty old. Good for you! – Lies. I still use the same jokes all the time.
You are completely incompetent at streaming however you’re quite welcome to ask for help. I’m in Adelaide and an expert in video encoding, streaming and computer networky stuff. You’ve finally been able to put out a survey using a site that’s not total crap, I think it’s about time you managed a decent stream too. – Fuck yeah. Get in touch.
You never do what others want so if someone complains here you’ll just do it more often you sneaky cao ni ma. – This person is smart.
You are a tremendous dick, I love you. – Thanks!
Needs more Krystal.
Please be more interesting. Thanks. – no u
Don’t flatter yourself, I never go on your blog. I just REALLY like taking surveys. – That’s okay! Glad you were entertained.
Please don’t pictures of ugly dudes in the Nugu Alerts like you did with the Extreme Edition. Please just keep posting pics of hot girls in official uniforms, not sexy Halloween uniforms. Sexy Halloween uniforms are excellent, but they don’t produce the same fantasy fuel which proper uniforms do. Thanks in advance. – Observant readers will notice that the “Extreme Edition” of Nugu Alert had a male as the header (usually it’s a female) and he was in a prison uniform (as opposed to a law enforcement-ish uniform). A subtle clue that it was an “opposite of nugu” April Fools’ joke before the reader opened the page! Kpopalypse blog is full of wanky little clues and symbolic gestures like that about all kinds of things for those who care to pay attention. Future Nugu Alert episodes will obviously return to normal procedure. Probably.
Sometimes you answer too many ask.fm questions at once and my twitter feed just fills up with your responses – everybody stop asking me so much shit and give this person a break. Thanks.
About the question when the next comeback of CSJH the Grace is, I answered with my birthday because I like presents. – Clever!
Do people actually complain that much? – Yes!
Thank you oppa, for teaching about carefully dating. Now I’m in a happy relationship with the one I had had my eyes on for a while. You were right, I waited, focused on meeting him in a friendly and relaxed manner and in the end he asked if we could be together. Always listen to Kpopalypse, kids! – Glad that it worked out! Kpopalypse dating advice, at your service.
Cut the image macros mate. Please.
I used to think Hwayoung was hot. I’m sorry. – I forgive you. Hey, credit where it’s due – her nails look great!
We deserve more Eunjung. And Raina. And Seo Jisoo’s buttplugs. Does that count as a complain or…? – Not really, but I’ll take it!
Not much to complain about. You have some weird/irrelevant/junk posts when I’d much rather see your serious posts, but you’re just a blogger, I understand. – I think “serious” vs “weird/irrelevant/junk” is a false dichotomy when it comes to my blogging. My serious posts ARE in some ways weird irrelevant junk. Likewise, my weird irrelevant junk posts DO have serious subtexts.
Minimize the slurs and we good. – Kpopalypse does not drink and never slurs his words.
You’re a bit try hard. Actually, most kpop blogs are now that I think about it. I’m sure if I had a kpop blog, it would be better. – I try hard because I have high determination levels. Better to try hard than to not try at all. Start your own blog, because you’re probably right and I could use a cool blog to read.
It really annoys me when you use fag/faggot, it is never funny and it makes you seem like a 13 year-old boy who’s insecure about his own sexuality. – My gay friends use the word faggot all the time, but I never used it much myself until Netizenbuzz said it was okay to use. Since Netizenbuzz appears to be the authority among international k-pop fans about what is acceptable behaviour for idols and people in general at any given moment, I bow to their superior wisdom on the matter. Take it up with that site if you’ve got a problem.
How the fuck can you ask someone to complain at you intentionally? There’s no way anyone’s gonna get a good hateflow going when you want to be bitched at, there’s no fun in that. Fuck off m8y
Kim Kwang Soo, Suzy, Sulli, Dani and Jessica have all been recipients of a POSITIVE POST from Kpopalypse. Who should be next?
Netizenbuzz took the lead in this poll, however the fact remains that I’ve already pondered on the many positive qualities of Netizenbuzz at length.
As it’s such heavily-explored territory I consider the results here for practical purposes to be a three-way tie between Youngji, Jisoo and Martina scratch that, here’s your Netizenbuzz positive post! There wasn’t much consensus for those who selected “other”, but Boram, Raina, Sorn, Barack Obama, Bom and Rolf Harris all made an appearance!
This is a GIF of Suhyun from Akdong Musician (AKMU).
Do you regularly visit the “Suhyun button” on Kpopalypse blog?
For those who don’t know (which appears to be most of you), the “Suhyun button” (formerly the “Eunkyo button”) is a clickable icon on the sidebar of my site that takes you… somewhere. The destination changes periodically at completely random times, on average once per week.
If the answer to the previous question was “yes”, please share your most positive and interesting Suhyun button experience. Otherwise, leave this space blank, or use this space for something else if you like. If you wanted, you could even make a witty observation about how you were right about that other question before about Kpopalypse and Google Forms.
Quite a few people lamented the changing of the guard from F-ve Dolls’ Eunkyo to AKMU’s Suhyun at around October 2014, but I did this because Eunkyo is no longer active in k-pop so it didn’t feel right to continue to include her. The lovelorn can relive the glory days of the Eunkyo button at this link, and around October 2015 Suhyun will also move on and be replaced by another k-pop individual (and will at that point also receive her dedicated compilation post of Suhyun button destinations). Most of the rest of you made comments about how Suhyun is actually quite attractive.
In a test with four multiple choice options, it is said that the third choice is statistically the most correct option. Do you prefer to select the third choice in a four-choice question?
It’s not a Kpopalypse survey without some irritating obscure/trick questions. Hopefully this question met required standards.
Do you resent multiple-choice questions that do not give you satisfactory choices?
Fortunately, nobody resented this type of question in the survey, because if they did, gosh that would be a shame. It’s great to see that k-pop fans can finally all agree on something!
I have a couple Kpopalypse Interviews in half-finished states because the people involved have simply stopped answering all of my emails for no clearly discernable reason. Should I publish the unfinished interviews for your amusement?
I like doing interviews, but it seems that many of my interviewees don’t like consistently answering my emails. They tend to start off super-keen and then go silent on me after a few days. With the non-enthusiastic reaction that I’m getting, anyone would think that free publicity on a bunch of internationally-viewed blogsites for a Korean musician is like some kind of horrible cancer. It’s at the point where I’m pretty much ready to say “fuck this shit, let’s just put out the dribs and drabs that I’ve got so at least I didn’t completely waste my fucking time”, but on the other hand I wouldn’t want to put off the next Sarah Wolfgang (i.e someone with a non-rose-coloured view and something actually insightful to reveal) from talking to me. But then would a person like Sarah who actually had something to say be put off by such a thing anyway? I’m still undecided on this point – but it seems that you guys aren’t! You’d like to see the unfinished interviews so I’ll give the people I’m currently interviewing (or trying to interview) a few more months to answer my fucking questions and then I’ll revisit this issue and see how I feel about it.
This is a picture of Sulli from f(x).
Will Sulli be present in f(x) for their 2015 comeback?
Opinion on Sulli certainly wasn’t unanimous, but the highest proportion of people still had faith that somewhere deep down Sulli actually gives a shit about being in f(x).
Since most k-pop fans who comment on articles on more popular sites than Kpopalypse seem to be self-appointed music industry experts who feel that they know better than k-pop CEOs and managers with decades of industry experience and insider knowledge about what any group should do or not do at any given moment, use the following space to make some bold predictions about k-pop in 2015. Or don’t.
Many people decided to really pour their hearts out and answered this question with multiple predictions that I only skim-read. Thanks for all your very lengthy and passionate replies! Maybe I’ll publish them soon and then read them at some point.
What fanfiction would you like to see a sequel of the most? Note: this question doesn’t guarantee that you’ll get one (apart from Project Luhan part 3, which is planned and will arrive in due course).
Most people really didn’t give much of a shit as long as I kept writing, and quite a chunk of people didn’t really like the idea of sequels, which seemed odd to me as I get begged to do them constantly! You anti-sequel people should speak up more! Out of those who cared enough to actually nominate a fanfiction to be sequelised, T-ara vs AOA: The Final Fap was the fanfiction that readers most wanted to see a sequel for. Will a sequel to this fanfiction appear? We shall see. Fanfictions that scored below the “I’d rather not see a sequel” threshold of 10.9% of the votes are not likely to see a sequel – apart from Project Luhan, of course.
You’re still thinking about the boobs on that girl from Pocket Girls, aren’t you. What’s the most important question that you have about Pocket Girls?
Kpopalypse never shies away from highlighting the important questions, and the question that concerned most readers was the “E” and “PS” factor of Soyoon’s boobs. One reader pointed out elsewhere in the survey that the girl with the short red hair and larger boobs is called SeA, and for this information Kpopalypse thanks you sincerely.
What annoys you about Kpopalypse blog the most?
Most people were happy, this is nice. Out of those who were upset about something, the biggest factor was too many words in the posts. Gosh, I’m so sorry for making you all suffer, I’ll have to do something about that at some point. I’ll make sure that I take that feedback on board to give you less words in future posts. By the way, here are all the predictions that all the survey respondents had for the future of k-pop:
|Less clothes more fapping|
|Things will get more fucked up but the music will continue to be good|
|T-ara would still be rolling on cash while netizens keep on hating and getting insecure.|
|HANI will still be as hot as always
exo fangirls will still be batshit crazy as always
some scanda on an innocent mistake will happen forcing the people involed to take a reflection period
kpopalypse will be there and laugh all about the bullshit that is kpop while fapping it to Raina
|The Jew dies.|
|The size of Pocket Girls’s breasts will change and people will be shocked|
|f(x)’s comeback will only be fine because SM is giving all the f(x)-y songs to red velvet but the internet will jerk itself off over it and declare that it personally saved kpop.
one of the korean members of exo will snap under pressure and either kill someone or leave. probs the little violent one with a scary mouth.
everyone continues to make shitty EDM songs which will be critically panned and I will be so so happy because I LOVE GARBAGE EDM (I sincerely love catch me if you can, not because it’s good, but because it’s awful. (not “not bad meaning bad but bad meaning good you know” but bad meaning bad) (although that pocket girls song is a jam and they all look absurdly hot and I hope they got that car show $$$, but it’s almost too good actually))
|1. Sulli & Choiza sex tape
2. Yura and IU sex tape
3. Jessica & Snsd reunion
4. Big Bang member change their nationality just to avoid military service
5. Kpopalypse is getting married
|Apink will get into a scandal as big (and possibly even more stupid) than T-ARA’s. iKON will not debut and neither will Pink Punk. SNSD will become the female TVXQ!, salvaging their career with actual listenable music. Ladies’ Code will take a turn for the worst as they make a comeback with the worst kpop ballad ever crafted as a tribute to Rise and EunB.|
|Fuck no; I wouldn’t know what the hell is going on between any idol these days, and frankly, I’d only care about their personal lives to see other fangirls bawl and spam the comments section when the big stuff is revealed.|
|All artists under SM need to go to YG so they can quite being fucked in the ass by corporate sluts who practically sell them them to make a quick buck.|
|u-kiss will finally win hahaha|
|white-coat concepts replace teh seksi|
|Tao will leave EXO. Girls’ Generation will split up. CL will fail in the U.S, as she should.|
|Exo will disband and I will happily swim in a sea of Exo-L tears. Meanwhile, aforementioned Exo-L will perish in a self-perceived apocalypse (oppars disbanding = world ending). Hey, why not turn this into a fanfic, Kpopalypse oppar?|
|dal-shabet gonna be the ‘it’ group followed by grls day comeback on cute concept|
|༼ つ ◕_◕ ༽つ|
|dunno maybe gfriend make it big or something. and it is revealed they’ve actually all been providing sexual favors to get where they are (rookie appearing on running man and weekly idol, how can it be?????)|
|Tao will leave EXO, and nobody will notice|
|-Taeyeon (SneakyKimchiBitch) will release a heartfelt ballad straight out of snoozville as the title track to her solo debut that Korean fans will love and international fans will hate and it will win a bunch of awards.
-A Korean member will attempt to leave EXO (Shia Surprise!) but then change his mind (because being blacklisted is a bitch) and it’ll be a PR mess. Naturally Knetz will blame the Chinese for trying to corrupt oppa.
-F(x) won’t get a fandom name (not that that’s news, but still)
-BIGBANG’s comeback will be met with overwhelming praise (regardless of song quality)
-EXO and BIGBANG will collectively win 90% of the awards at the MAMAs
-iKon will win all the rookie awards once they debut
-Sooyoung will get engaged
-Hyoyeon will be back together with her chaebol boyfriend
-Miss A’a Min will start dating (probably a friend of Hyoyeon’s chaebol)
-If EXO doesn’t lose a member, Red Velvet will add 4 more because SM needs a new OT9
-Seohyun will shock everybody this year…
-JYP’snew girl group will debut with moderate success
-Wonder Girls will still be in limbo/purgatory
-Jessica will (anonymously) release the nudes she took of SNSD
-Hitomi Tanaka will release the sex tape of her and Jonghyun (which everyone will disregard because why would Jonghyun ever cheat on Key? With a Japanese chick of all people)
-Red Velvet will have a comeback later this year featuring a mid-tempo 90’s ballad
-Hyuna will have a comeback and fangirls will clutch at their pearls and call her a slut while she bathes in fanboys’money.
-YG’s new girl group won’t debut until AT LEAST October (if at all)
-Yerin (15&) will get her solo very soon
-SM’s stocks willonce again rise and they will be the richest Kpop company again…until something dramatic happens in August, causing them to once again drop
|moar fappable vids
more shitty, indistinguishable hip-hop groups/concepts
|Not a prediction but there need to be more nine muses realises this years purely because I want there to be.|
|Hani slay bitches with youngji as a sidekick. Crayon pop will go junping jumping over exo oppas|
|Red Velvet will win the 3 weekly music programs (KBS/SBS/MBC)|
|Kai will date me and his fans will commit mass suicide in jealousy|
|EXID’s next variation of their famous hip thrust move will involve strap-ons|
|I boldly predict that K-Pop will ascend to world domination in 2015. All hail the new world order.
Then again, they might just keep releasing videos of pretty girls with background music.
|suzy will get pregnant with jyp’s baby|
|Some group will get into a fatal car accident. I hope it’s a male group.|
|There will be scandals.|
|Soyeon to get married, quitting T-ara.|
|SISTAR WILL SLAYSTAR|
|Young Min is going to continue fucking up Sm until Kingdom comes.
K and I netizens will remain but hurt over the smallest shit which someone is going to lose their job for.And I’m finally going to leave this he’ll hole of a music industry (very unlikely but it’s positive that I put it down in writing).
|thats your job not mine. I dont know shit|
|Girl Group Member A’s sex tape with Boy Group Member B will be leaked to the media.|
|Choa softly caresses Yuna’s face and…shit those are my fanfic notes. IDGAF about predicting shit; ot, but I can’t stand when people claim they knew someone was shit before a rumor came out; no, you don’t have superpowers, shut the fuck up. So you wanna read the rest of that fanfic?|
|K-Pop fans will still lose their shit over everything.|
|idols will reflect and be back with a more mature image|
|No one will see it coming but Hyoyeon will get a solo and it will go viral like Gangnam Style, much to the disapointment of AKF authors and just everyone really|
|Don’t have anything to comment here, so here’s a camel:
|Hopefully some more shit with EXO will go down, that’s all I can think of right now.|
|I’m too lazy.|
|Snsd continues to release shit music, loses one more member
T ara continues slaying
Yg to release the snsd clones
2ne1 hopefully disbands
Bigbang releases more shit
Lee Hi is nneglected forever
|SNSD loses another member, but EXO stays at then until next year.|
|CL will flop and dr. Pepper will sue her|
|BigBang will release an absolute dogshite album because YG cbf and all their stans will lap it up anyway because of all the hype and Yang Huk Suk’s brainwashing that all his idols are ‘artists’ and ‘talented’, or worse, ‘geniuses’.
CL’s American debut will suck. Idk maybe it’s happened already, I don’t keep track or anything.
SNSD will continue pumping out progressively worse and worse feature tracks, but still continue putting out some truly awesome B-sides. Same goes for TTS. SM clearly don’t know what they’re fucking doing, Express 999 was so much better than that flop IGAB, who the fuck would buy that shi-….. oh wait.
Nine Muses will have more lineup changes and eventually Minha will be the only original member left. Her face is full of determination and there’s no way someone like that would give up on being in the best girl group ever. Hell, maybe she’s the one bumping off all the others. Watch out Hyuna, your cats might be in danger!
Apink will get involved in some scandal, forcing them to reflect and return with a more mature image, aka sexy concepts (no fuck off, cute concepts aren’t sexy concepts, I mean slutty heels and cleavage and ripped clothes and shit, none of this innocent little aegyo virgin bullshit). It’s about time, they’re all grown women now. Hopefully the scandal will weed out the less attractive members and leave me to fap to the hot ones. Actual good songs wouldn’t hurt them either. None of this particular prediction is based my music industry expertise, just a wish for it to happen really.
|SNSD will lose another member.|
|cl will be the laughingstock of the us if she even becomes un-nugu|
|This is not a prediction for 2015 but the coming 3 to 7 years.
I think girl groups will slowly take over the charts, pushing the boys out and making the companies realize that there is more money to be made in girl groups; making boy groups an endangered species.I predict that by 2020 there will be No male k-pop groups, and the concept will be considered laughable.
|I HOPE EXO WILL DISBAND BECAUSE I’M TIRED OF THIS SHITTY GAYFEST|
|Still fucked up until 20-whatever but still got some hot people so idc.|
|a jessica vs snsd battle|
|LOTS OF GROUPS WILL DISBAND.|
|Pocket Girls will dominate the K-pop scene for years to come.|
|T-ara will reign supreme.
A sex tape between two idols will appear.
EXID’s popularity will go down.
All female idols will be slut-shamed by jealous teenage girls.
9muses will release another good song.
Hyoyeon will have a solo that tops all the charts.
I have faith un JYP potential girl group Sixteen.
|1. Rainbow, Dal Shabet and Nine Muses remain nugu status.
2. Dal Shabet won’t follow up with any song promotion after Joker for this year.
3. Debuts for girl groups this year will be mainly innocent concepts. Sexy debuts will not be as much.
|2NE1 slaying the whole world, specially CL. Also, Bigbang will return like queens. EXO is going to be murdered by their not-so-crazy-fans. Sojin the high priestress in the whole K-pop.|
|I predict that I will fap to Bangtan Boys in 2015. It’s a pretty certain prediction.|
|I have no predictions, since I don’t care too much about the stuff happening. I just want to see chaos unfold.
But I do have to say I don’t care about Sulli, so the 4th answer above seemed the most fitting. Somehow.The only thing I think is likely, is Taeyeon getting that rumoured solo thing.
|Exid will become one of the new top girlgroups.|
|Soyul will win against all other girls in jelly wrestling as usual and Crayon Pop will turn on godmode and overthrow Girls’ Generation and everyone else on the kpop ranking ladder.
T-ara will have an awesome korean comeback and shits on hating netizens’ opinions.
Eunjung’s solo will slay the charts.
Raina will have a solo comeback – this time with an awesome song
|Another member of SNSD should be kicked. CL will fail her US debut because she drank Dr Pepper from the fucking freezer. Who drinksDr Pepper from the freezer.|
|shit i care about:
-f(x) release a really good album which still fails.
-IU keeps on releasing good shit
-Neon Bunny releases another really great album
-We Are the Night release something (pleeeeeeeeeeeeeease!!)
-Idiotape come back with a good albumshit i don’t car about but still possible:
-SNSD release some more terrible shit and disbands. (Yoona and Sooyoung go into acting, Sunny does radio/variety, Seohyun does the odd musical and then ends up irrelevant, Tiffany tries a solo career that doesn’t work out because she can’t sing to save her life. Hyoyeon and Yuri end up fading into obscurity and eventually doing some dance instructing, Taeyeon tries to go solo and people finally realise that she can’t actually sing that well and has no talent, she then ends up living off of the money she’s able to suck out of Baekyun’s dick. Jessica’s business is a success.)
-More nugus who I couldn’t give two shits about debut and they’re all shit
|As a self proclaimed music industry expert, more fap will be delivered|
|There will be a tentacle monster in one MV during the late 2015|
T-ARA/T-ARA N4 hit it big in the US
CL flops in the US
kpop sex tape dug up from somewhere, probably involving shindong.
|Some music will be released. Some new groups will debut. Some old groups will disband. I will fap.|
|the return of the cao ni ma|
|Lovelyz will be the new queen.|
|I have no idea; look at last year, you almost couldn’t have made it up! Hopefully this year will have no tragedies|
|someone will die|
|It’s going to get a lot better when Hyosung makes her comeback.|
|Oh, I’m an industry insider, all right…
(This is still Tao, by the way. I tried to bring the Bacon back to answer this question, but he’s playing Call of Duty right now and let’s face it, I’m much more awesome and manly than him and I also don’t cry like a bitch when my lesbian girlfriend dumps me for a folder of Jiyeon pictures)
Anyway, these are my 2015 predictions:
– T-ara vs. AOA jelly wrestling match will be broadcast nationwide after ‘someone’ (totally not me) leaks ‘secret footage’ (again, totally not me) to the public
|Jiyeon will finally become a cyclops.|
|Bold prediction: HyoSeong will have a comback and it will be glorious. f(x) will release a minialbum that will suck|
|Big Bang will be delayed.|
|2NE1 will break up following the resounding success of CL’s U.S. Debut and Bom smuggling herself back to America in CL’s luggage so she can finally get high and reflect in peace.
Suzy and Minho will break up, followed shortly thereafter by Miss A.
Hyuna and her male backup dancer will return with another Troublemaker single. Hyuna’s rack will return with even larger cups…again. Hyuna’s haters will return with even more frenzied slut-shaming comments typed one-handed while nursing increasingly more chafed genitalia. The rest of 4Minute will appear on a couple of obscure OST tracks because Cube executives are too busy looking after Hyuna. G.Na will spend another year curled in a ball, crying in the Cube Ent dungeons until the Christmas song for 2015 is recorded.
APink will face a backlash for releasing the laziest MV in modern Kpop history. The reason for this is that the group is sharing a cell next to G.Na until the members break their habit of getting caught on camera ‘innocently’ fellating inanimate objects.
|Park Bom will come back strong into the kpop scene|
|Kpopalypse will stop trolling us with troll surveys.
Maybe RV will take on SM’s best songs once f(x) disbands.
CL’s debut is going to hit it big. She’s working with Scooter, bruh.
sulli_fag will write one last article before he dies of butt sniffing overdose.
|Snsd will disband or be inactive. TTS will surpass them in popularity|
|2015 will still be the same|
|CL’s American debut will feature a horrible song and it’ll flop.|
|exid gonna rise|
|JYJ will actually show their faces on national TV and get more weird-ass fans and unwanted attention.|
|When will Tara comeback ahcdhesksd|
|There will be a Steve Irwin concept. Mark my words.|
|Some random girl nobody cares about will be involved in a scandal with some guy slightly more people care about, and as a result people care about them.|
|The industry will remain the same|
|BoA will put out an awesome song, will be super hot and 10x the dancer of anyone else. no one will care.|
|GD will do a featuring in a Rihanna song and the magnificient vocals of the diva will go so well with the magic rap(e) voice of my God GDragon.
Oh also like Gary Le Lacheur said : “Lee Hi has a voice far superior to all the other KPop stars. It is deep, emotional and has a beautiful timbre. She should go solo, sing what makes her smile. What is this about a comeback? I hope she has not stopped singing. The world will be a sadder place without her lovely voice. Does Lee Hi write her own songs? They are very good. To Lee Hi, don’t let the greed and commercialism of the music industry silence your wonderful voice. Go solo. People want to hear your voice and they will support you. Gary Le Lacheur. Rockhampton, Queensland, Australia”
ps : Oh, and G-Dragon is amazingly hot and smart and he is a musical genius. I love him.
|Shit will happen, maybe.|
|APINK SEX SCANDAL|
|Smells like cheese|
|YG uses all profits from Big Bang to fund Akdong Musician, primarily for plastic surgery.|
|From february until now there were more songs that i liked than in the entire 2014, so I feel that our ration of good music was filled and for the rest of the year the music will suck. I’m looking forward to a lot of cringe from CL and Big Bang.|
|Groups will debut. Other groups will comeback. All of said groups will release songs. Some of these songs will be popular. Others will not.|
|suzy will want to leave miss a so jyp will kick the other three out. hell, then you can have fei to yourself.|
|I predict my biases will get screwed over by their stylists yet again, but I will still be thirsty for them beyond anything. Either that or some of them will go to do their military service thing, which will be as hot as what they wear on stage because military clothes are awesome.|
|I calmly accept whatever will happen this year. Just, please give me another After School comeback (minus them performing from the physical rehab ward at the hospital) because the “First Love” album was glorious.|
|AOA will be given a shitty bravesound song a la What’s your name?, causing Jimin to drop a diss track on him and go on to produce the rest of AOA’s songs, preferably as AOA black but letting Seolhyun and Hyejeong dance in the background without any lines.
Krystal will hug her sister or something to mock all of korea and prove she is an american bitch who can’t be trusted.
SNSD will have a shitty comeback because they suck without Jessica.
SM will let Amber sing and she won’t ruin f(x)’s great last comeback with her rap.
|Someone in apink will have a “scandal” and they won’t be seen as perfectly pure fairies anymore, kinda like IU.|
|– 2ne1 will disband
– EXO will become a 9 member band, with Tao being the only Chinese member
– I will be bored because I feel like the drama won’t be on the same level as last year
|Exo members are “dating” Pocket Girls. *wink wink*|
|cao ni ma|
|Who cares I just hope they don’t go trash like 2010|
|If Pocket Girls achieves fame, K-Pop industry will go on the AKB48 route: where all the girls groups are in existence only for fapping and with all the related weird otaku fans. The question is: is it an ideal world or no?
Nobody can negate how beneficial is fapping, but at the same time a musical industry based on the AKB48 model is very weird and disgusting as we can see in Japan.
|JYP’s underwear can no longer contain his enormous dad-dick and after going balls deep into Jessica Ho, his wife leaves him. He gets depressed again and finally gives Miss A a decent song again instead of Sistar-esque bullshit. The mv features the tasteful, sensual raping of each Miss A member, evoking in the viewers a resonating sense of classy sexiness. It is a commercial hit and as a tidal wave of spunk overflows the sewers of South Korea, scientists learn to utilize the power of unfulfilled sexual fantasies to generate boundless energy. Thus kpop leads humanity into a new era of prosperity and world peace.|
|U-Kiss will win something,|
|1) T-ara will have another comeback, again with better song than SNSD,
2) Every big comeback (except of T-ara ofc) will sound like “Like a Cat”,
3) Jiyeon will prove to be a decent person, two additional netizens will not hate her anymore,
4) Ga-in and HyunA collab. Imagine that.
|i just hope jessica will do a solo|
|I don’t really listen to kpop anymore, at least not on a regular basis. Only when I’m driving to college and it comes up on my 200+ song playlist.|
|Sulli and Choiza fuckin get married or some other Sulli related thing that will piss off toddler f(x) stans.|
|bigbang will come back, maybe.|
|it’s going to be messy with all the sm acts running off the trail and all stupid wannabe sexy groups getting more attention. and don’t forget jyp and yg getting nuguer everyday. but i still have hope for f(x) slayage!|
|I will be hired by SM Entertainment to fly their private Gulfstream, which will lead to me meeting and wifing Hyoyeon and making lots of adorable Korean-American babies.|
|IT WILL EXPLODES|
|next up after EDM: polka revival|
|well I think their will be another group to pull a exid and get really popular through a fancam and I think rainbow is gonna go on hiatus for like another year but then someone is gonna see a fancam and their gonna get anticipated for a comeback but the comeback is gonna suck and they will damned to nugudom unfortunately :c
ok i can see how that was dumb af but i not good at predicting kpop scandals there all too stupid scandals anyway
|SNSD will suck. Big Bang will be abysmal, BTS will be okay, Pledis might debut Seventeen,no one will care.|
|I think 2015 will be the year in which the Girls Generation empire will fall. I think people will realize that these girls are old (and that Red Velvet is here to replace them). Also, EXID will gain more popularity and AOA will try another miniskirt but will not succeed. I think people will forget about Crayon Pop entirely.
Also, we will hear some weird rumor from the Wonder Girls but nothing big will happen and EXO will still make fangirls’ panties wet.
|CL bombs in the states and makes it nearly impossible for kpop acts to try and achieve fame outside of Asia. Because of this, most companies will start to block videos to countries like the U.S. Meanwhile, Bom is still filling in as someone’s realdoll, Sulli has quit f(x) to be a housewife, and SNSD fans are still buying their shitty songs just because our favorite California white girl Tiffany said “I love Catch Me if You Can, do you love Catch Me if You Can?” And the world fainted looking at her eyesmile.|
|Shinee still needs to lose a member so i predict key or onew will leave|
sulli hop back on the top of my bias list and she’s going to kill seulgi for taking that spot from her. i’ll be sad to see seulgi die but happy ebcause my queen came back.
t-ara will make a nice comeback.
2NE1 will die.
SNSD will get more success without that horse looking lazy girl holding them back.
I won’t pick on a single bias and just waifu one or two people per group.
|Apink will rise to SNSD levels of dominance.|
|– krystal will leave f(x)
– woo taewoon will win the next season of smtm
|Jessica will go to prison after stabbing 3 members of SNSD in a psychotic rage. Nobody dies though.
Jisoo will come out with her own brand of buttplugs.
|EXO loses its remaining Chinese members. TVXQ’s Yunho will enlist into the army first, closely followed by Changmin in a fit of jealousy after rumors of a Yunjae reunion surface. Big Bang’s comeback track is delayed until after their tour, only to be postponed indefinitely. CL will remain nugu in the US. GG will continue to give no fucks and still top kpop charts. Sulli returns to f(x), but Krystal bails out to join Jessica, thus time and becomes the new cao ni ma in f(x). VIXX will outdo Voodoo Doll this Halloween to set a new standard in gory/creepy kpop videos.|
|Seohyun’s dating some Exo douchebag and will be forever drowned in Exo-l’s tears|
|Eunjungs solo won’t win because korean fans are fags.|
|I’m just here for the music.
I really am.
|It’s possible that bad stuff will keep happening like members of groups leaving or groups disbanding, those stupid dating scandals.|
|Hwayoung will have her solo debut as a professional rapper, rapping I likey likey this for 3 minutes. And then she wins #1 on all music programs, beating exo & girl’s day whose their comeback dates share with Hwayoung’s debut, because her dedicated ahjussi fans buy some trucks of her album. Some of them including Primary & Choiza|
|I know that t-ara will release a great song.|
|maybe snsd will finally release a good song? not really sure about that one|
|After a lot of public pressure the most important CEOs of kpop will admit to jelly wrestling and will create a pay per fap channel with Simon and Martina as live commenters for the international audience. Also, kpop idols will stop faking being able to sign and will instead concentrate on implants for their fight bikinis. Or getting prettier.
They are gonna make zillions.
|LABOUM will topple SNSD.|
|EXID will rise. AOA will fall. f(x) will come back with Sulli, but Sulli will do a really bad job at performances and complain about everything throughout the whole promotional period. Red Velvet will continue to be popular, and everyone will continue to complain about Red Velvet being popular. Someone from SNSD will be caught wearing Blanc&Eclare sunglasses and the whole fandom will implode upon itself. Big Bang will win everything there is to win, even awards they weren’t nominated for.|
|teenage Idol pregnancy, yes plz|
|EXID will flop, to the disappointment of many. Wonder Girls will make a comeback feat. JYP himself with the disbanded Wonder Boyz as backup dancers. Their comeback song will be called Jane. Western media will continue not giving a fuck about kpop and rightfully so. CL will do badly meaning badly in the US. Park Bom and Bumkey will make an r’n’b ballad subunit. SM will buy another entertainment company. YG will choose the ugliest fucker they can find and sign a 10-year record deal with them. Gayo Daejun will feature another irrelevant Western popstar and praise them for their accomplishments. Girls Generation will suck a bag of dicks, figuratively and literally. Park Keun-hye will organize a public execution of all her opponents on the same day as an SM-YG-JYP joint 10-hour superconcert will take place, therefore nobody will even notice. G-Dragon’s fashion sense will unfortunately become relevant again.
I’ve actually written these down somewhere so that I can tell my dog I was right.
|( . Y . )
I . I
I Y I
I I I
|Strip club concepts become the next big thing. Or maybe more hipster edgy shit.|
|Yg might actually produce good music.|
|Everyone will be disappointed with something. Kpop will continue to be entertaining half because of actual Kpop and half because of the crazy fans.|
|EXO vs Big Bang.|
|A relatively known female idol will comment on a an Asian Junkie post. Even witty or troll commenters will be nice to her and start caring for her group for about a week before an agency debuts a 7-member girl group with a beautiful girl named Seunghee, another one named Jimin, a hamster lookalike named Seungyeon, a foreign token member who speaks english, a sister of an established idol, a rapper with Shin “hey” Jimin’s style and another rapper with L “The Nose” E’s style.|
|There will be girl group with gangsta concept. But it might be a cover up.|
|Idk anything, but I need C-REAL again in my life, their debut song gave me life. Still a jam. How come they’re not on nugu radar? They went MIA as fuck.
Also I really liked Red Velvet’s clothing in Ice Cream Cake MV, so I’m very sad there wasn’t an option for ‘Why are they in their pajamas and where can i buy them?’
FUCK YOU POPPALYPSE FUCK YOU
I’D FUCK YOU
I’D FUCK RED VELVET
I CAN DO.20/4/2015
|well…. we’ll leave that to the expert kpop fans|
|I don’t know… I like what I like and can’t explain why.|
|Hongki is going to bomb FNC Entertainment and try to take over the world because the CEO wouldn’t let him buy a 10 million dollar scooter.|
|YG girl group will debut|
|Big groups continue to put out boring music, small groups continue to put out excellent music.|
|JYP will be the King of booty. Maybe in a bad way.|
|Big Bang will win all the awards. F(x) will make another great album, and will either disband or have a concert.|
|Big bang might come back one day.|
|I’ve no clue. I’m a lawyer, I don’t predict things like this. Or anything, really.
Actually, I can predict Jaehyo will get exactly one line in the next Block B comeback. I’d bet my toy alpaca on it. But that’s like predicting ultra-conservative Supreme Court Justice Scalia will actually, with effect on people’s lives sort of thing, oppress women and minorities in his next opinion, or even like saying rain is wet.
|Big Bang will slay and you know it. More chinese exo members will leave.
Some nugu group will come up with a cute concept. Crayon Pop’s new single is gonna be awful. Block B will come up with another scandal.
|YG has some *nice* scandals, because I don’t like YG.|
|fap fap fap|
|CL will succeed|
|Bro, I don’t follow k-pop that closely. I come to your site to watch trainwrecks because why not. I guess if I were to make any prediction, it would be that a Korean member of EXO is going to jump ship and implode the mind of all the close-minded EXO-Ls who insist that Kris and Luhan leaving EXO is solely because of the inferiority of the Chinese.|
|More great groups will debut and it will be marvelous.|
|exo will break up. finally.|
|2NE1’s music will continue to be shit in 2015.|
|Sunny will leave SNSD with SM’s blessing in mid-late 2015, and SM will rush out an SNSD dance line subunit and/or a Red Velvet comeback to distract fans. I think it’s been planned already, which explains why the dance line got so much screen time in CMIYC and Sunny got about two seconds. SM is trying to get us used to a SNSD that’s TTS + dance line, and the two subunits will end up promoting mostly separately.
This started out as a silly prediction but I got more and more convinced as I wrote, and now I fully expect to type “I told you so” into your ask.fm come August/September.
|big bang shit. exo shit. sm shit. some group is going to come to america for some concert or event and slay.
shinee onew will be in a scandal.
|YG is going to delay something|
|so much edm.|
|Some-one from EXO will leave/have a massive scandal
Jessica’s business will grow, knetz will continue to be salty as fuck
Infinite and SHINee will both have solid comebacks
Taeyang will have some clusterfuck of a hairdo for Big Bang’s comeback
Orange Caramel will continue to slay
|music-wise i predict more cafe-inspired muzak to listen to while it’s raining. maybe even a resurgence of trot amongst the young people.|
|i prefer don’t.|
|fuck it tbh i’m wasting my life anyway|
|Afterschool will disband
Member of Exo will leave
SJ Kibum will come back into singing
|I predict that no one will be able to beat the music video for FM, ever. Maybe.|
|this year daesang song will given to least expected singer|
|I fully expect idol mud wrestling in japanese game show format, on every weekend.
Here’s hoping T-ara do absolutely nothing and get shit for it again. That shit was funny as fuck.
|pocket girl = national/legendary girl/boy group/band|
|Sm will have another lawsuit scandal
More stupid dating scandals
Tvxq will forever stay in Japan
|I’m gonna have a six-some with f(x)|
|Exid will flop, simple.|
|Bold predictions my ass. Anything remotely connected to being either bland or irrational is almost guaranteed. How about
1. Chad Future will be successful
2. Boram will be revealed as your mum from the past. Or the future.
|Kpop will kpop until kpop is no more.|
|In 2015 K-Pop will begin taking over the world.|
|Blahhhh….. your options are really ……|
|More dating scandals.
Oh, the music ? Well…
|Some groups will continue to suck, other groups will continue to rock.
Some groups will unexpectedly suck, some unexpectedly rock.
|Someone on YG will be on a drug scandal.|
|Crayon Pop will comeback with a super great song and it will flop.
Oh did that already happen?
Then I don’t care what happens next.
|Another SNSD dating scandal.|
|After School will disband if their next comeback flops, Orange Caramel will stay.|
|I predict that I will still not be able to see any kind of kpop-MV from my country……which probably spares me from a lot of torment.|
|jessica gon b having a hard time with her (maybe nonexistent) comeback|
|I just want more sleep, man.|
|pocker girls will be this year’s viral group and other nugus will try to catch up to them, with stellar being the first ones in line. it will be glorious
apink will have a dating scandal and forced to reflect and return with a more mature image and finally release a song that isn’t a huge failure
2ne1 and snsd will release good songs too (ahahahahaha too bold?)
|cao ni ma|
|T-ara will dominate the charts.|
|exp will save kpop|
|2pm will be successful again|
|bigbang comeback cancelled in last minute – next comeback attempt in 2018 after 3 more years of capitalizing on fantastic baby
ice cream cake, err red clones will disband due to hair color controversy, or possibly blackface – even the stans won’t know who got kicked out
suzy will become even fatter of a whore
more ailee nudes, i hope
more and more nugus will appear – and no one will care
|good music will finally be released by the three major companies with the impending comebacks of their super groups. lol jk, this is not 2009.
t-ara will have a comeback and will fap to it even if it sucks. there’s a mute button for a reason.
|SNSD will tank. Please do.|
|B.A.P will win the lawsuit and go on to bigger better things like staying in the group and will come out bigger and better. (im praying and dreaming… LET ME PRAY AND DREAM DAMMIT) my boys *cries* TS could of made so much more money on them if they treated them like humans and not slaves. Their merchandizing was amazing they were so cute.|
|Suzy will not be fat.|
|One person on the SM roster will leave.|
|Fiestar will go Gosu and show the K-Pop world what a proper girl group is like. Or Girls Day, but Fiestar is way cooler because I say so.|
|men will turn into women but women won’t turn into men|
|I can barely predict my own grades….|
|Seohyun is dating bro|
|Stop with these blank spaces. I just came here to click buttons.|
|Get fucked, coffee stealer.|
|End of k-pop.|
|SNSD will lose popularity
A korean EXO member will leave and the universe will explode
Big Bang will make an okay comeback with TOP fine self and GD will be as tryhard as ever
JYJ Junsu will rule all of kpop and marry me
Jay Park will be even more successful and love me more
|there will be good songs and bad songs and most of kpopalypse’s 2015 best ofs will be stuff I’ve never heard of before|
|I predict that in 2015, more ignorant little shits will flood these same sites. I don’t care.|
|more hyosung for all|
|I shall boldly predict that a Korean member of EXO will leave, because that would be some fantastic fallout to read in comments online.|
|K-pop in 2015: it’s gonna blow huge dicks.|
|Both top girl groups will disband|
|I’m pretty confidant that at least 50% of artists will be revealed to be pod people working for the Illuminati. The other 50% are of course the originals that the pod people are based on, and they just never realised.|
|Hani will confess that she’s in love with Soyul. ‘s Sauce.|
|Non-music realted.I don’t know shit about production.
1.Atleast one more member from EXO is getting the shit out of SM.
2.Atleast one SNSD member is going get knocked up and get hitched.
3.Sulli and Choiza’s sex tape is going to release.
4.Fany and Dickhun’ too.Need to see the legendary Dickhunda.
|SM stock plummets due to contract issues.
DSP fucks up another group.
Oh same old shit every year.
|EXO-L getting even crazier than usual. That is one thing I’m certain about.|
|The top tiers will fall and the mid tiers will battle for their spots.|
|I chose the last option on the Sulli question, but what does cbf mean?
Also, I predict in 2015 we will see the possible disbandment of Rainbow and/or Secret…or both groups make a surprising leap to the top of the charts. Notice I wrote “possible” so that I can’t technically be wrong. I’m so fucking smart it kills me.
|tao and lay leave exo, and the group continues to get stupid fans. kris-luhan-tao-lay form their own group in china. they get successful. fast forward to few more years, they get more sales/money than exo.
snsd makes another shitty comeback in korea that will sells and brings in the cash. and they continue to not give a shit on stage. we got married finally gets canceled because of a huge scandal in which the producers result to offering the idols/actors sexual services in order to convince them to stay on the show.
CL’s american advances media played as successful when it still fails to get to any mainstream attention. another nugu group gets viral and opens for a huge-american pop star.
|it’s going down down down down dowwwwwwwwwwwwn|
|We will continue to see a rise in koreaoboos as kpop gets progressively worse.|
more brave brothers
(these may or may not be good things.)
|Crayon Pop will overtake Big Bang to become music powerhouses|
|I don’t care, i’m here just to fap|
|Ummm, please use more punctuations. U are simply putting your thought to words on the go…
Kpop predictions hmmmm, Red Velvet will be huge since SM knows their other female acts are in the dumps..
We will see a lot more sexier rookies from girls side. We may even see graveur level kpop artists…
|Hopefully the exodus will continue. Or maybe the shitty hep hap boyband trend will finally cease to exist.|
|SNSD will have one member left.
BESTie will save k-pop.
JYPplastic pants will make a solo comeback.
Sunmi and Gain lesbian subunit.
|Jonghyun or Taemin will start wearing drag queen makeup and fill Jessica’s spot in SNSD. POWER OF NINE|
|doesn’t matter, people will still moan about the past|
|Kim Jinwoo is as old as my father but he slays and I hope he’ll continue to bless us with his presence. Still the tought of YG creating a sub-label for hip-hop/musicians and giving it to Tablo makes me really uncomfortable, because I have a lot of nostalgic feels about YG Ent from the 90′-00′ era and I hate their new boybands ; c|
|HAHA, I love that comment, fuck if I know what’s going to happen, here’s a lame prediction from me, sulli will quit f(x), and get pregnant from Choiza, finding, she makes way more money off child support, than as an idol. More scandals, regarding idols’ lack of pay from companies will come out, and thus more fake dating scandals, and red velvet promotions will occur to distract the public Two or more well established idols, whose careers are on a bit of standstill, will come out as gay, and will use this as a marketing ploy for international fans, and more open-minded Korean fans.|
|Youngji will rule the variety world!|
|hopefully g-friend will stop|
|This will be Big Bang’s last comeback as a group.
SM will have another shitty song win number 1 in music shows.
Mblaq as a trio will probably flop.
Block B will do something stupid again.
Rain will marry Kim Tae Hee, lucky bastard.
SNSD will have a bad song for their korean comeback and it will still sell a lot.
More scandals that nobody gives a crap about, except all of those kpop fangirls who use “My oppaRRR!!!” *breathes heavily*
|hyoyeon will go solo and become the next hyuna
some boy group member will come out as gay then a bunch of them will leading to innumerable fanfics coming true and a great flood of vaginal juices to sweep over korea
bom will finally break and unleash her wrath, becoming the korean godzilla
|Most likely more songs will come out in 2015.|
|Kpopalypse stops with the image macros|
|the will be boobs.
must be boobs.
all sorts of boobs.but srsly i have no clue, you will probably share your side some time soon.
|Im gonna predict a gay idol couple getting caught hooking up. It just has to happen eventually.|
|As long as no other sexy lady dies this year I’m already satisfied. Also, praying with IATFB for that Wonder Girls special stage with all 7 girls.|
|red velvet will skyrocket into fame|
|2NE1 will be missing but who cares.
Amber will learn the lesson and won’t try to go solo because that song is fucking awful and she will do what se does best (looking manly as FUCK in f(x)… when they come back.. IF they come back)
I don’t know, I’m too lazy for this.
|EXP will be the best boy band in kpop.|
|Athletic wrist bands everywhere.|
|Another EXO member will leave.
Sonamoo will have at least three comebacks.
Hyosung nip slip. Please.
|T-ARA in China. Everyone else in the toilet.|
|Tao will probaby leave EXO. Big Bang will make a comeback and it will suck but everyone will pretend to like it. f(x) will fade back int oblivion. No one will become anhero. I will be sad.|
|Jesus Christ this survey is long.|
|Sulli and choiza make their own unit called suck my dick (song is called oh wait she already did). The MV is just their sex tape. All kill + daesang.|
|– SNSD will crash and burn at the end of this year and Red Velvet will be the new SM queens.
– Mamamoo keeps getting pushed aside since all other groups are fuccbois or I guess in this case fuccgirls and are scared to shit of their talent. All hail Mamamoo.
– Wonder Girls comeback or at least a reunion concert.
– miss A goes back to the dungeon since Suzy is busy getting that D.
– Jessica debuts as a solo artist and doesn’t crash and burn like the others.
– And finally, the world will finally know that Taeyeon is a bitch and kicked Sica out of SNSD.
|IU will release an album, and it will again be better than 99% of kpop albums.|
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|a group will disband
a group will debut
a nugu group will suddenly get popular
g.na will come out with a decent song
|2ne1 will flop again|
|Kris to return to Kpop. A battle between EXO and Red Velvet to be the next OT9|
|tao will be heard crying out of a window again due to false rumors and scrutiny from netizens|
|Bestie will finally make it as everyone realizes they’re infinitely better than EXID (in both looks and ass shaking).
Red Velvet’s next comeback song will be total shit just so SM can see how much they are able to get away with already. People will eat it up just like they do SNSD, but RV will get good tracks after that anyway.
Rainbow will die for real and Hyunyoung will be forced to live off of donations from her new (and glorious) gym workout livestreaming career.
|Miss A will disband and JYP will declare bankruptcy|
|More kpop girl groups will start having disputes with their label companies, but instead of having their unfortunate circumstances acknowledged, they will some way. somehow be slut-shamed, victim-blamed, and then forgotten about.|
|1000000000 new groups will debut|
|it is going to be just as boring as it is every year|
miss a disband
|THE NUGUS WILL RISEEEEEEEEEE.|
|Vague blind items will be posted and readers will draw silly conclusions.|
|More scandals for idols. More drama for celebrities. More popcorn for me.|
|So that new SNSD song is out. It’s ass. But because it’s them they’ll win super 1st place everywhere. There’s also that Big Bang come back. They already won 1st before actually coming back. Strangely enough 24k just came back and I was just thinking about that ball of failure too. I assumed their company realized the rappers weren’t shitty enough or didn’t have deep enough voices to make fangirls queen in ecstasy. But hey they did come back so maybe Rania has a chance. Fuck Hello Venus.|
|Girl groups will reign supreme! They kicked ass in 2014 so I don’t see the trend stopping. Yay!|
|a sexytime scandal|
|sorry I had to do this survey twice, so gotta repeat my answer from last time. gfriend sex scandal (they been giving out sexual favors to get TV show appearances)|
|T-ara will release a chinese album that will do decently.
Lay will leave EXO
SNSD will effectively disband
BB will disband at the end of the year
GFriend will get a scandal that will make them famous
More rape cases in the entertainment world
|Big Bang will continue with their trolling. Fangirls reportedly turn into zombies and start a revolution. The next hitler will be found in the form of a busty 15yo.|
|a big group will disband|
|more sexy concepts idk|
|Girls day comeback. nothing else.|
|Areum will debut as a solo artist & become kpop queen|
|– YG’s new girl group will debut and will officially replace 2NE1.
– T-ara will score a Top 10 Korean hit.
– f(x) will release their best album yet and Sulli will fuck things up. I sure hope she does.
– Wonder Girls will come back one last time. (this is more of a dream, actually).
– Lay will leave EXO.
– EXID will release the third installment of Up & Down and will cement themselves as the new Girl’s Day.
– Big Bang’s comeback will actually be worth the wait.
– Unnecessary G-Dragon solo.
– JYP’s new girl group will hit the top of the charts with their debut song ala miss A’s Bad Girl Good Girl.
– Sunny will be revealed to be dating. A chaebol preferably.
– A not-so-nugu song will rule Kpopalypse’s 2015 best songs.
– Jessica will release a single. Will flop but would still have the better single than Girls’ Generation.
– At least two more relevant idol dating scandals.
– Jimin will release a solo and would hit number one. Still will remain inferior to Seolhyun.
– Super Junior will release their shittiest title song to date.
– CL’s solo song will finally top Kpopalypse’s worst Kpop songs of the year.
– I need to stop.
|GFriend will make it big with their next comeback to replace the basic Apink.|
|a new girl group will début, if it’s a cute concept, fans would be like, “Ohhhh they copied (insert girlgroup name here that used the cute concept and utterly became famous with it e.g. SNSD, Girl’s Generation, So Nyuh Shi Dae, SoShi, GG)”
if it’s a sexy concept, fans would go, “EEEW SLUTS. this group is better (insert girl group name that used the sexy concept wisely e.g. none actually)”
other comments would include: “Why can’t they be like 2ne1, they have a unique concept tbh.”
Exo-L’s would still make smutty fanfics
GG is still missing a member
F(x) would probably be next to lose a member
SONEs will still be whining about other girlgroups winning in music shows all except for fellow SMEnt groups
|CL succeeds in the US. Sounds pretty bold enough to me.
Ladies’ Code finally come back as a trio, but with a darker image, that’s supposed to mark a tribute to EunB and Rise.
…….yeah that’s pretty much it, actually. I’m not really in a productive mood atm. lol
|I love myself !!|
|Jessica and Ja Rule sex tape.|
|Sulli will release a diss track|
|Suzy will be a fat whore again this year.
CL will teach us what being the baddest is all about.
Suhyun will get plastic surgery.
|Apink’s *insert name* will be caught in a dating controversy – no one will care.
f(x) will promote a total of 23 days.
New SM male group will be called GBoyz
Seohyun will be show more boobs (hopefully)
Beast will comeback – but we will ask “Who?”
Crayon Pop will have a sexy and mature concept.
|I’ll make the easiest of all predictions, and only about interesting shit because I’m a lazy fuck. Here goes:
-An EXO member is leaving before the year reaches December. Tao will cry near windows again, and it will be recorded and released by SM as a repackage album. It will sell like crazy either thanks to brainless EXO-Losers or #TeamSchadenfreude fans, and chart on #1 for about three months.
-Everyone will continue hating T-Ara while still fapping to annoying assholes from popular boy groups because kpop fans are hypocritical as fuck. They will still continue releasing awesome songs and charting decently nonetheless.
-Jessica will continue getting more attractive as the year passes by. People will continue to be pressed. Equally, by the end of the year SM will get rag dolls attached to wires and string to perform for concerts in SNSD’s place, and no one will notice because it will have the same quality as if it was the real deal.
-BigBang will comeback, but it will be in the least expected moment of the year and with little promotion because YG is a dick. Nonetheless it will rake in awards and money ridiculously because of depraved thirsty fangirls. It will actually be decent because TOP and Seungri will not let GD shit all over it. Token weird Taeyang hairstyle. No one will care about Daesung besides Japan, as per usual.
-Dozens of hot girl groups with sexy concepts will debut and perhaps with good music or coreography, but will get tons of hate from butthurt fangirls (except for myself, who will fap regardless) because apparently being attractive is a sin.
-The Red Velvet clone army will take over the world. But no one will care because everyone will gladly accept their new clone overlords. Especially Joy.
|fx may disband or krystal might leave 😦
some nugu girl groups will disband or member leaving 😦
exid will hit it big
aoa may fade
big bang will comeback
gg will comeback and slay
iu will comeback and slay
someone will come out as bi
|Shitty music released by shitty groups for shitty fans|
|some groups will debut and release average songs. a lot will disappear but like three will still exist and maybe have one good hit song and then they will split and go on their separate, chinese-film-making ways.|
|At least one member will leave SNSD after Jess.
Big Bang will retire.
Clara will get pregnant.
|Some shit will happen and people will overreact. Heard it from me first|
|I think Star Empire will notice Keumjo’s talent and make her prettier. She will then proceed to be the Hyuna (4minutes, not the be confused with the fop Hyuna who is also in 9Muses) 9Muses, and lead the group to world domination.
T-ara will keep make amazing songs and getting prettier (and younger in Boram’s case) which will make Kpop fangirls hate them harder.
EXID’s Hani is going to have a nude scandal and I will fap to it (most relevant imo).
|Scandals. Which draw out said self-appointed experts and Kpop Social Justice Wannabes who often appear on Netizenbuzz (nothing wrong in ACTUALLY supporting social justice using calm reasoning and debate). Proclamations and doomsday predictions that something must and will finally be done about the corrupted, circle-jerk-shit-fest of middle-aged CEOs that they think is unique in oppressing their oppars and unnies. They forget about it the moment something else turns up. Rinse and repeat.
Music Releases. Stans gather on one side of the hate-ball court and antis on another. Mystical energy spheres made of prepubescent hormones and uninformed rage commence to fly forth. Everyone else faps.
In other words, same old, same old.
|More crotch shaking will occur in girl group videos.|
|Tal vez gané BTS por primera vez|
|TREN-D comeback. Ladies Code comeback. A new 7 or 8 member co-ed idol group would be nice, too.|
|Somethin bout big bang’s comeback (the only one from that group i give a fuck about is seungri)|
|Another SNSD member gets kicked out, Kwanghee commits seppuku|
|Older groups (SNSD, SuJu) will become more irrelevant as new groups (Girl’s Day, EXO, Infinite, APink, AOA) take over. (Not very bold)
Sex Tape……but it’ll be from some nobody we don’t care about.
More idol couples will come out, and then their fans will write positive comments about their relationship instead of the usual practice of deluding themselves in the fantasies of their Oppars being completely celibate until marriage at age 35.
|Jessica, Kris, Luhan and Sulli will make a kpop company together. They will call it F.U.S.M. The first group they will have under them will be JYJ. Eventually they will buy off the other kpop companies and become one of the “Big Three” kicking out SM with the help of YG. Lay will join the company and keep the studio that SM gave him.|
|Kpop in 2015..Oh jinkies don’t even get me started. DID YOU SEE WHAT HAPPENED IN 2014?? -.-;; *sigh* Back to the topic, I presume BIGBANG will finally have their comeback and new rookie groups will debut. A LOT of Kpop stars or actors..etc. will have to join the military. I hope no one dies or gets into a massive accident. I’m getting the feeling that there’ll be multiple dating scandals, not that they are actual scandals…BLEH.|
|Do more/longer radio shows, fuck.|
|jewelry comes back from the grave AND people actually give a shit|
|Bigbang comes back, fangirls say “they slayyyyed their life”, kpop is over.|
|Krystal leaves FX/SM
Sulli goes on permanent hiatus(Kibum/Suju)
The rest get The Grace treatment
|more girls I can’t tell apart|
|T-ara comeback and Korea doesn’t give a fuck.
|I don’t know, some shit that makes me listen to regular people music for a about a month and then go back to k-pop because I like the imagery or some shit. Maybe Shindong will smuggle some fireworks.|
|Big Bang will come back with similar clothing style that EXO wore in ‘Call Me Baby’, because EXO stole the aesthetic from GD’s outfit on stage at MAMA 2014.
I know i sound fuckin’ delusional, but i noticed it the first time I watched the MV.
|jackson/youngji not dating, actually an elaborate ruse to be each others beards.
Lee Min Ho breaks up with Suzy after like 8 months, you know, like an average relationship. Everyone promptly loses their shit.
Rainbow comes back towards the end of the year, it fails, and they disband some time in 2016.
YG debuts his new girl group next year, but as it turns out it’s not actually a girl group but ANOTHER boy group because he couldn’t find a girl as sweg as CL. MattyB from Youtube is the leader.
|A new girl group will debut in three months.|
|exid will take over the world and kemy will find another realdoll to diss|
|I think people will realise that anything produced by GD is complete trash, and BigBang will flop; turns out they DID wait too long to comeback. Amber joins Super Junior to help keep numbers up. A member of EXO gets a minor cold; consequently 200 young girls commit suicide, another 1000 become addicted to meth.|
|EXO WILL DISBAND AND I’LL DRINK ALL THESE DELICIOUS FANDUMBS TEARS|
|EXO will fuck up again. It’s a perpetual motion machine at this point.|
|Music will be released.|
|feminism will arrive in kpop 😮|
|less crazy than 2014 with better music?|
|Everything will crash and burn gloriously. Also nude photo leaks.|
|Super Junior’s Sungmin will divorce his wife as she has a lesbian lover|
|I’m good with prediction… My prediction for 2015 is EXO will make comeback, and with comeback song is Call me Baby.., (I’m good right?)|
|I feel like there will be even more “sexy concept” to both our delight and disgust. Just wait, Suhyun is next.|
|RIP EXO, more girl groups, more boobs, more nugu, more fugu, more fapdu|
|exo’s sehun, suho and kai will have a sex tape and sm will love it and decided to be a porn company instead.|
|Bigbang will have a trap comeback, BTS will have a trap comeback. 2NE1 will have a trap comeback. SNSD will have a trap comeback. SuJu will have a trap comeback. EXO will have a trap comeback. SHINee will have a trap comeback. Got7 will have a trap comeback. 2PM will have a trap comeback. Wonder Girls will have a trap comeback. Miss A will have a trap comeback. FT Island will have a trap comeback. CNBlue will have a trap comeback. AOA will have a trap comeback. T-Ara will have a trap comeback. After School will have a trap comeback. Orange Caramel will have a trap comeback. Crayon Pop will have a trap comeback. Davichi will have a trap comeback. Everyone will have a trap comeback. TRAPOPALYPSE.|
|-Girls’Generation-SHY (SooYoung, Hyoyeon, Yuri) will debut and everyone will either hate it or love it and AKF will pretend to hate it and secretly love it.
-iKon will debut and flop as a wannabe Big Bang/awkward brother to WINNER
-AOA Jimin will drop a fire solo hip hop/rap album featuring underground rappers like Choi Sam.
-Afterschool comes back and no one really knows what to do.
-AKF will debut as a 7 member boy group talented in singing, dancing, and rapping with debut lineup: AKF, Kpopalypse, Soyeon Friend, Sohyunna, zaku, 아저씨, PTS_Sr. (sulli_fag and HanYeSeulFag were originally members but removed when revealed to be Sulli and Hanyeseul Saesangs)
-Fany Pack will debut as a 6 member girl group talented in singing, dancing, and rapping with debut lineup: Fany Pack, Shinbi, akisame, The Duchess, maknae, WTFisastarship.
-Fany Pack’s music will be 1000x superior to AKF’s singles, but Kpopalypse’s Daddy appeal and zaku’s Seohyun-esque actions win fangirls over and they do better in physical sales but Fany Pack are digital QUEENS
|PSY revealed as “the Korean Bill Cosby”.|
|Super junior will not make a comeback with a shitty theme *crosses fingers* They are grown ass men, they shouldn’t be performing in fucking mariachi suits or whatever|
|1. f(x) will come back with all 5 members
2. All the EXO members will leave SM (fingers crossed)
3. Suzy will return to being a fat whore.
4. NO MORE GIRL GROUP DEBUTS GOTDAM THERE WERE SO MANY LAST YEAR
|Bold predictions? nah…it all gon be the same shit, new shitty debuts, few hits, fap fap, butthurt fans crying over their oppa.. been here for over 5 years and aint shit change bruh|
|Wonder Girls will make comeback and take back the queen throne.
Big Bang’s comeback will be delayed.
|some1 in snsd will get preggers|
|I predict there’s gonna be new fancam stars getting born this year. But there is something I don’t understand, why hasn’t it been done before? I mean why is people like Hyunyoung or Minhee, whose videos got large views, not huge stars now? And Rainbow and Stellar succesful groups? Anyway Raina is kind of ugly, yeah.|
|kpop = too many scandal|
|sulli will be caught sucking off choiza by dispatch|
|T-ARA will kill every girl group that now sells better than them to claim their rightful place as Number 1. Girl Group|
|Tao and lay will leave exo and another girl from snsd will have a dating scandal. Meanwhile sunny will still be single and continue to whine about it whilst using excessive aegyo.|
Most of the music will be awful and generic.
Most of the girls will be hot.
T-ara+f(x) will produce music that isn’t awful.
Sonamoo will comeback but will not be a powerful concept (because kpop seems to dislike sticking to this despite the fact it’s actually great when the girls have the potential to do it).
SNSD will continue to make boring/irrelevant music; look bored while performing it, and still be showered with praise for it.
People will whinge about Jessica being missing and irreplaceable when she clearly hadn’t cared about the music side of being in SNSD for ages. She gave up on dancing about 1 year in, and has never been a great singer.
f(x) will keep me happy by doing some awesome complicated choreo that isn’t just butt wiggles ala Hello “no butts” Venus. (WiggleWiggle has a great beat though…)
Purfles will comeback with a good song and no one will notice.Extraordinarily Optimistic Guess:
Chocolat will comeback is some form
Kpopalypse will acknowledge Sonamoo D.ana as the undisputed cutest idol in the world and stop worshipping at the false alter of Raina.
|Girls Generation will crash and burn without Jessica, then break up with a whimper.
Red velvet will pump out even more garbage tracks that nobody likes and squander all of their potential. They will also all get PS to make themselves look even more like identical injection-molded real dolls.
Hani’s money maker (and nothing else) will take EXID to the top of the charts.
Orange caramel will put out a bunch of cute M/Vs that are way better than their songs.
Crayon Pop will drop a few more tracks don’t come anywhere near their initial releases.
People in korea will spaz out about a bunch of imaginary drama. A lot.
|Money will be made|
|dal shabet will remain irrelevant|
|EXO will comeback as a 4-member band and will sing trot|
|All of snsd will be dating
Cao ni ma will fled off with some big dick grown ass man
Hee chum will prolly open his identity about his… sexyaitu
idk. you tell me.
oh! red velvet will make it BIG
|More crappy ballads|
|Exo’s gonna go down the shitter|
|Girls day will be big as shit. and t-ara will release an even shittier SOOPER EDM BLASTER!!|
|YG will promote himself more than his artist.|
|EXO will disband|
|IF KPOP COMPANIES RUNS THEIR COMPANY THE WAY I WANT THEM TO THEY WOULD BECOME BILLIONAIRES!!!!!|
|Lay will leave One Direction|
|I’ve been struck by lighting, therefore I’ve been blessed with ESP by Mother Nature.
1) Members of K-pop groups will come out as one of the following orientations of the LGBT community, confirming the fantasies that fans (mostly girls) dreamed of in their horribly formulaic fanfictions. This will break some straight fan hearts while gaining some LGBT fans. Likely targets are EXO, 2PM, G-Friend, and 2NE1.
2) No girl group would ever be as successful as Girls’ Generation. 2NE1 will not even become close to that and that’s coming from an ex-Blackjack. f(x) and Red Velvet will be the only groups to gain at most 65% of Girls’ Generation’s success.
3) CL will still try to break into the US music industry and will lose huge numbers of fans. Hopefully she will fade into obscurity. The best she could do is be a one-hit wonder.
4) Girls’ Generation will still do well at everything. They don’t even need to do much and they still make money. Fans like me will still support them because they are the ones that introduced me and got into K-pop.
5) PSY will continue to milk his viral success until an unfortunate accident happens. What kind of accident, you ask? I don’t know; I’m new to this so don’t judge me so harshly! Meanwhile non-K-pop fans will still associate him to be the epitome of K-pop.
|T-ara will get lonelier. And lonelier. I will cry and feel sad about my QBS. Jiyeon will keep on hogging all the attention like the pig she is and stay at 69th place in my T-ara biaslist preceded by the gap between Boram’s incisors.|
|Raina will have a sexy solo debut.|
|THE NUGULAND INCREASES ITS AREA|
|lay oppa will bring back kris luhan and tao !!!|
|Huge hani scandal
Fx won’t make it through a whole promotion again
Exo will become a 8 member group and sm will try to put more people in the group
Block b will do some offensive shit like they do with every comeback
Sm entertainment will crash and burn
Cl will have a mediocre us debut that kpop fans like but no one else gives a crap about
|*Exo will eventually loose the 2 remaining Chinese members and settle as a 8 member group. Exo-L all over the world commit mass suicide.
*F(x) will become a four member group because Sulli only wants to exclusively cao ni ma Choiza’s dick.
*pastel colors are the new black, and the overwhelming amount of cute concepts will give us diabetes.
*One of the members from JYP’s sixteen turns out to have an iljin past.
*CL debut song in the US will raise some curiosity and some will consider it relatively successful, but the following single will flop hard.
*One of the biggest male groups will loose one member. The Oracle is a little confused right know, but it’s one of the following – Infinite, Beast or 2PM.
*Hello Venus will continue delivering nice fap material and Lime will reach the spotlight for some reason.
|all ur favs lose and die|
|TOO MANY DEBUTS
|There’s another Troublemaker comeback?
Actually, I’m calling a Ladies Code comeback as a three-piece for a tribute ballad. Goes #1 and then they are disbanded.
|EXO will continue to lose members, girl groups like AOA and EXID will become more and more popular despite the sones that plug their ears and refuse to believe otherwise. Another SM rookie will be charged with fraud and/or a sex scandal. Big Bang will finally come back and it will be utterly underwhelming to anyone with brain cells.|
|B.E.G. will slay with their new album
Nana will do something amazing
|B.E.G. will slay with their new album
Nana will do something amazing
|I read like the first 4 words of this and gave up|
|Lim/Yubin rap subunit lollll
SHY (snsd) bc why the fuck not
Areum solo?? lol
Irene from JYP?? she gonna do anything shes hot af
Jyp will make a new group, but it’ll be like shitty wondergirls
suzy will leave miss a lol
hana will get more face surgery
another t-ara comeback
sistar comeback in like sept/oct
trouble maker comeback aug
aoa black comeback nov
shitty snsd korean comebac dec, something christmas themed and sad
new shitty group from t-aras company, consisting of fuck dolls and badstars members lol and dani
yoonjo will join after school ahhaha
ara will do some ballad shit
more orange caramal comebacks like 4 moree between now n next march
2pm split up
super junior die
|– the SNSD comeback will suck|
|It’s gonna be boring af with generic songs (i don’t hate it but still…)|
|SNSD will magically dissolve into the abyss of Japan, leaving only Kween Hyoyeon behind, who will liberate CSJH from SM’s dungeon and join T-ara as an honorary members.
f(x) will finally drop a member
EXO-Chen will become a reality
|Original TVXQ line up reunion. Collective fangirl jizz ensues.|
|I already predicted Dal Shabet would breakout but alas this hasn’t happened (yet). I still want a boy group to comeback/debut with a stripper concept though because that would be incredible.|
|It shall be a contest between Red Velvet and EXO at to who can get to OT6 first, while that guy at Kpopalypse struggles as the Red Velvet adds a younger member and he can’t fap to Joy. Honestly more tragic than any thing that happened in 2014.|
|We’ll need more popcorn|
|Some will suck, some will not suck. I will feel more of a creeper as children born in the 2000’s begin to debut.|
|Sulli caos ni ma
SM revealed to have gotten all their idols hooked on amphetamines so that they can keep awake through all their schedules.
Sunny is in charge of the drug empire.
|Do you think Sulli’s mouth is bigger than before?|
|EXO’s gonna disband. And I will be here holding my bag of popcorn. Along with M.Jackson by my side. And that chicken from “I REGRET NOTHING.”|
|KARA and TARA receives love from korea|
|shindong will be caught fucking you with mutual consent|
|Kris is going to comeback to SM to replace Jessica’s position in SNSD while Luhan will be a new member of 2NE1 filling CL’s place when CL goes to America, Tao will replace Nicole’s place in KARA
KARA’s Jiyoung will comeback to Korea and with Jessica and Kiko they will form a new K-pop girlband called ‘Hate me Knetz’
Dara will be forever untalented
Netizenbuzz will release that her blog sucks and close it
All commenters in Netizenbuzz will release that their comments are stupid
My assignments will still haunt me
|couldnt even begin to pretend to know what the fuck im on about|
|K-pop in 2015…will still be for Korean fans, not the international ones.|
|Big bang will sweep off all the charts with their fantastic baby remasterizided 2k15 so eventually nomore boybands would never ever debut or make a comeback.
EXO will be one, when all of them leave one by one except suho who will be fired.
Sunny will get some juicy scandal just because she is bored as hell.
F(x) will go on an forever a ever hiatus.
Shinee will make a comeback as a queer band because is what SM always wanted.
Ikon will debut after their sumbainins, they will be underrrated acording to their own fans.
Winner will be preparing for a comeback that wont ever came.
Sorry for my english and my lack of gilrs predictions. Not sorry.
|One of the Big 3 company heads will die this year.|
|Exo will remain as exo’s suho.
T-ara will keep slaying in China meanwhile pressed kpop fans will cry YASSS
Crayon Pop will make an iljin drama because they are raw hep hop.
Lizzy will be a main lead in a drama and netizens will get pissed.
Nana will win some useless survey again.
Bom will comeback as a solo because she is a “Born hater”
BB will make a comeback with fantastic baby trot version.
Hyeri will be in a drama, more pressed tears, she’s a thug.
Xiumin is the saviour we want but we don’t know we need yet…
|I sense some contract wars in the air, Tao and Lay will only be the beginning of 2015’s slow and painful ability to sap the life out of SM’s reputation and dreams.|
|one day gfriend will go sexy|
|Twenty groups will get into car accidents and twelve actors will attempt suicide. Nine will succeed.|
|Sunny’s mood lately is not due to her having a busy schedule, it is due to her being pregnant with LSM’s inbred baby. She will give birth to the abomination before the end of this year.|
|The songs will be less crappy than last year hopefully.|
|yg will not debut his girl group bacause he never had one and was just imprisoning young females for Seungri.|
|bts will do something scandalous in canada|
|Just to cite a few
1.bigbang will take over kpop this year (unfortunately)
2.exo will keep the entertaining dramas coming (hopefully)
3.snsd korean comeback will flop
4.the rookies girl groups will slowly take over.
5.infinite will flop
6.beast will keep on doing well
7.Yg will debute a new girl group overtaking rv While still making the most boring music to ever grace our ears. Ofc their fans will still praise papa yg for the high quality.
8. woohyun will not have his solo.
9. jon snow will survive this season of games of throne.
And lastly I predict many dating scandals from dispatch (excluding yg artists)
…..I sure hope f(x) will have another album though. all I care about is they are gorgeous and have been releasing good stuff for the past 2 years.
|Bestie will rise, someone else will die, Kara will continue to decline but try to ride on youngji, apink grow closer to being a top tier girl group, more debuting girl groups that ppl will love, a top/pretty popular girl group will disband or an old one will get back together,|
|They will probably up the badass and tone down the cute, as seen from previous comebacks and debuts. Also, SNSD and EXO may completely fall apart. SNSD seem to be the ahjummas of the Kpop world, and in their recent single and appearances, even they seem tired of this shit. 2014 seemed to have quite a few debuts in the Kpop world, so I think many veteran groups may lost public interest, or be a lot less active in the Kpop scene.
Also, I think JYP and YG may get a buttload of hate this year, as well as stress. JYP already sucks at managing his acts, and YG seems to have bitten off more than he can chew, with IKoN, WINNER, Katie Kim, Big Bang, etc. But that’s my opinion.
|2015 will mark the beginning of the end of the idolatry in Kpop. Jessica’s sacking from SNSD was the crack that may have started it. To fire one of the “goddesses” of Kpop and break the magic number nine [three to the power of three, for those who believe in numeracy] members is like opening Pandora’s Box.
Then there is the trending pattern of members of established groups [KARA, Lee Joon’s group, for eg], and some as-yet-to-be-established groups [EXO, Kiss n Cry] not willing to renew their contracts, or even break their contracts. This does not bode well for Kpop.
Furthermore, there’s too freaking many groups now that resembles one another doing the same sheeeety thingy …. and there won’t be enough colours in the spectrum for their individual fan base which might lead to civil [fan] war in South Korea. And if the hundred or so Kpop world-wide fans get involved, it might lead to a World [fan] war…
Further, furthermore, South Korea is also well known for their plasticky surgery thingy and a majority of the members of different groups, same groups, and even some soloists, are beginning to look alike….. Wait, maybe they have succeeded in cloning humans…. It could be the Next Big Thing.
I think therefore I am
|The only boy group I care about is going to army so I’m predicting girls will save kpop in 2015.|
|Shit will go more-down. And I, personally, cannot wait. Bring the lesbian scandals! (Seriously, please do. I’m really gay. I need this.)|
|SM will try to get me to listen to their music. They will fail.|
|Jessica makes her own girl group that only ever get dressed in head to toe in Blanc and Eclare . Hilarity ensues.|
|Tao and Lay will hopefully leave EXO so I can continue to be entertained by the developments of the battle royale photo on AJ.|
|IU Scandal 2.0.|
|World tours will still exclude Europe|
|An idol will come out as transgender.|
|Personally, I believe that waiting until this year to debut Oh My Girl was a good choice on the part of WM entertainment. They could have chosen to debut them much earlier, but they waited for B1A4 to have a more stable fanbase before making another move.|
|-EXID will become more famous (they r good).
-After School/Orange Caramel comeback
-Good things in general will happend 🙂
|i’m no shaman|
|1. Big Bang’s overly hyped up comeback will fail. Every song will sound just like all their other songs. Although there will be 1 song that’s acceptable because the English in it will be more awkward (and thus more hilarious) than “Wow, fantastic baby,” but less idiotic than than Super Junior’s “Close your lips and shut your tongue”
2. Sulli will announce that she is doing a solo album and earn hate from everyone while the rest of f(x) sits in the SM dungeon. But Amber will somehow get gig on a webseries drama.
3. SNSD’s Sunny will be revealed to be dating Lovelyz’s JiSoo.
4. Zico will release another ‘controversial’ song to gain attention & prove his thug lyfe with the phrases “nazi,” “jihad,” and “hard biscuit.” It will be a cringe-worthy mess.
5. Netizenbuzz will crash and be down for 3 days. I-netz will go crazy after 5 minutes and seek refuge in asianjunkie’s comment section.
6. 4minute will finally release the amazing song everyone has been waiting for to get back to their glory days.
7. Tao and Lay will leave EXO and no one but EXO stans will give a fuck.
8. Junsu/Xia will release another overly artistic music video that no one understands.
9. Cheetah’s album will have 4 amazing songs, but the single that will be dropped will be the worst song on the album.
10. Lil Cham will host a reality TV show with San E about underground rappers and their cribs. They won’t realize they are not in on the joke.
|Lots of sexy people will come out. The music will be better than last year’s and the year before but lol that ain’t too hard especially for the year before. I will develop five more man crushes and find three new women I want to be. SM has five scandals towards the end of the year. Big bang’s videos look like they cost several million, because they did. Then they break up even though I don’t want that. Teen top continues not to change their name even as their members leave the teen years. Year 7 class 1 gains lots of traction for being fucking adorable. You write many fan fictions. We all reflect at year’s end that a lot has changed but also nothing has and life is pointless but might as well keep going cause wtf else are we supposed to do. Also someone has a kid. Thank you & good night.|
I hope you enjoyed reading through all of these predictions.
Kpopalypse does a big survey like this every six months. Is this:
The survey frequency isn’t going to change but I just thought I’d get your opinion of it. Most people seem to have the right attitude!
Will Jisoo return to Lovelyz?
Readers were hotly divided on the topic of Jisoo, with no clear consensus of opinion. People couldn’t even agree on how much of a cum in their life she was. Dark times for k-pop.
Which of these character traits is the most important as a life skill?
Calm acceptance and high determination levels were the big winners here, as Kpopalypse readers flexed their life skills knowledge! There’s no point expecting things fondly apparently – too many disappointing high-profile k-pop comebacks lately has probably made the average k-pop fan bitter and cynical.
How do you like your coffee?
Most readers wanted their coffee on ice, perhaps in anticipation of needing to chill their anticipation of CL’s American debut.
This is a picture of Raina from After School/Orange Caramel. It is here to say thank you for doing this survey.
I just also thought this was a nice picture of Raina, who doesn’t usually photograph well despite being my #1 k-pop bias.
Please rate your enjoyment of this survey below, on a scale between 1 and 10, with 10 meaning “meets required standards” (MRS) and 1 meaning “not 1 meaning 10, but 1 meaning 1, you know?”
Most people seemed to enjoy the process, which was nice. Quite a few of you edgy cool kids from “I hate everyone equally”-land gave me a 1 which makes me wonder why you did the survey at all… hopefully you got a chance to get up from the computer and stretch your legs a little and perhaps get some sunshine later on that day.
Thank you for participating in this survey! If there’s anything you’d like to say to Kpopalypse, you can do so in this text box. You can skip it if you wish.
The final question – lots of you had stuff to say. Some selected comments and replies to finish this post off:
Can you do my homework for me? Please? I’ll help you take over the world. – Get in touch for homework rates.
Thank you for putting as much time and effort into this survey as SNSD’s producer put into “Catch Me If You Can” – Oh my, that’s a low blow. My trolls are getting better (if not prettier).
Do more top 30’s so i can read you commenting on more songs. – Expect them fondly.
Hey Kpopalypse. I’m a Cao ni ma. I’ve been reading your blog since I’ve discovered it last year. Nope, I’m not really a kpop fan. But I do listen to some Kpop songs. And I likey likey your blog.- Quite a few of my readers aren’t really k-pop fans which is interesting. Thanks for tolerating my blogging anyway!
Please don’t stop doing what you’re doing. I know you’re a sarcastic mother fucker but honestly I love reading kpopalypse, it brightens my day and puts a smile on my face where nothing much else makes me smile these days. aussies represent – Cheers!
Stop writing fanfictions. They suck. – Here’s a fanfiction: Boram beat you over the head with a dildo. The end.
Thank you, oppa. I have to admit, I was letting other fans’ assessments of what songs/groups are worthy affect me. Like I felt almost silly if I liked a group whose vocals weren’t as blessed as some others. Or this single didn’t sell a lot of copies, it must objectively suck. I got caught up in the silly games netizens play, in which they invest way too much of their lives as soldiers in their bias’s internet army. Reading your blog was like getting a huge reality check: K-pop is just music, and music is a personal experience. Guess what, I’d rather listen to Orange Caramel’s fun and danceable songs than sit through some (as you would say) shithouse ballad album put out by some exalted “vocalist.” Honestly, I really tried! My hands kept on replaying Magic Girl, and I was powerless to stop them. I learned to disregard the opinions of others on what I personally find to be a good song. Their opinions are just as valid as mine, because music is 100% subjective personal taste. I am fine with personally liking fandom-hated songs, such as Mr. Mr. and Wa$$up’s Fire. I feel like I can enjoy music of any genre again without worrying about insignificant details. I just ask myself, is this listenable to MY ears? That’s it. I know I wrote a lot, but I felt that I had to say thanks for the medicinal dose of reality and trufax that you bring to lost and confused k-pop fans such as myself. Keep it up! Plus you introduced me to “Ring Ma Bell” by Two X and that song kicks ass. – This type of effect is part of why I do what I do. Thanks for reading!
Come work for me, love you lots from JYP x0x0x0x0x0x – no way, I saw you staring at that girl’s ass, you creep me out.
this one wasn’t very good. you tried too hard and i just now realized ur material is getting old like eyk. switch it up honey. i know you can do it. – note to self: must recycle same jokes more.
Tony Abbott sits when he pees – trufax
You’ve been doing a good work with your posts, you annoying bastard! – Thanks… I think!
That question about coffee offended me because I gave up coffee and you just gave me cravings – lots of people complained about this. Sorry folks. For the record I hate coffee.
Talk about T-ara more – okay
Thanks to your writing, I successfully convinced one of my friends that K-Pop companies are not a good place to be and she officially quit auditioning and is now applying to grad schools. – I am happy. I probably saved someone’s life here.
Please wait for my postcard!! I’m one of those mystery readers from the third world country listed in your entry about your blog stats. You’re my favorite blogger xoxo – will do! Hopefully it arrives, I know some countries have funny unreliable postal systems but Australia usually is pretty good so we’ll see. Anyone else wants to send postcards, DO IT – Kpopalypse 3D Radio PO BOX 937 Stepney SA 5069 Australia.
If your chubby chaser oriented, how do you stan Raina? – Someone who prefers chocolate ice cream still craves strawberry at times.
I love you, please keep bringing snarky condescending rudeness to kpop. It’s so fucking boring if people take it too seriously. – Will do!
I enjoy reading most of your posts because they are interesting and informative in regards to kpop and music industry. Plus, they have a healthy dose of sarcasm. I find too many kpop sites where fans have sticks up their asses about things and don’t know how to chill out. What’s also admirable is that you don’t just make click bait posts, but you actually put in time and effort into researching and creativity for a post. For instance, your guide to boobs in kpop could have just been stupid pictures, but you went all out and did this rating scale with examples and all. Honestly as a woman, I could fucking care less about various breast sizes in kpop, but you did a good job with it and I actually found myself amused and interested in it. – Thanks! I’m glad some folks actually know the difference between a click-bait post and a proper post.
“What annoys you about Kpopalypse blog the most?” IMAGE MACROS. I just know your next post is going to be nothing but image macros you cunt.